Hate Watching Greenland 2: The Slow Death of Cinema

A sequel can be bigger, darker, and meaner, but it still has to make sense. We take on Greenland: Migration as a natural disaster movie and post-apocalyptic survival thriller that keeps sprinting past its own logic: rations that magically last years, bunker life that feels weirdly comfortable, and character deaths that happen so fast they barely register. We’re not asking for a documentary. We’re asking for cause and effect, stakes that stick, and a world that doesn’t collapse the second you think about fuel, medicine, or basic survival behavior.

We also try to untangle the movie’s endgame, from the “civil war” language to the supposed war zone guarding a fertile crater in France. That’s where we introduce our favorite concept from the show: the “Dan Goodsell line,” the one sentence a script uses to explain away something bizarre so you’ll stop asking questions. When that line works, it’s a cheat we’ll happily accept. When it doesn’t, it becomes the loudest problem in the scene.

After we vent, we pivot to stuff we actually enjoyed, including Brawl in Cellblock 99 as a reminder of what it looks like when a movie sits in a situation and lets tension build. We also hit quick recommendations and TV talk, from Send Help to Jury Duty, and we tee up what we’re watching next. If you’re into movie podcast reviews, disaster movie debates, and screenwriting craft, you’ll have plenty to argue with us about. Subscribe, share the show, and leave a review, then tell us: what’s the worst plot hole you’ll still forgive?

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Tony: @tonydczech

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Transcript

Cold Open Banter And Regret

SPEAKER_03 0:00

Uh hashtag sad.

SPEAKER_01 0:04

Such is life. One big disappointment.

SPEAKER_02 0:08

No, no, no. That's you, Tony.

SPEAKER_01 0:10

Ah, yes. Sorry. I I thought that was more of a universal thing, but maybe it's a more centric thing. Got it. Okay. One big disappointment. Good to know. Good to know. Good to know.

SPEAKER_02 0:34

Welcome to HeWatching with Dan and Tony.

SPEAKER_03 0:38

I'm Dan. I'm Tony. On this show, we we talk about movies, and this week we're talking about a legacy movie.

SPEAKER_01 0:48

I like that you put it in quotes. I like that. That's good. Because it's just a legacy to us, really, not to the world. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_03 0:56

Legacy movies are the movies that we have to do because we've done the first installment, so we do the second installment, or we did the second installment, and then we have to do the third installment because the new Avatar movie just dropped on streaming.

SPEAKER_01 1:11

So I come on, I was like, well, there's three hours. I'm never gonna get back pretty soon. Jesus Cameron.

SPEAKER_03 1:17

And I mean, since this movie is was only an hour 38, do we have to do another legacy movie next week? I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 1:22

That's I mean, that's fair. This one was nice and quick. I'll tell you that like this felt good.

SPEAKER_03 1:28

I won't say it wasn't painful, but it was But it was quick. It was a short night, you know.

SPEAKER_01 1:34

You're like, is this I might I guess we're in the third act? I guess this is the third. Is this the end? I guess so. Hokey Toky.

SPEAKER_03 1:43

Um Tony, why don't you talk about what movie this is?

SPEAKER_01 1:48

Well, this is a movie in one of my favorite genres of all time, which is of course uh natural disaster movies. I love them, I am obsessed with them. Um, I enjoy the first movie. I rewatched it this week. Yeah, um uh it's called Greenland. Yeah, it's uh you know, it's it's interesting because that movie takes the genre and makes it very focused on one family. As opposed to most of these natural disaster movies, it's like, you know, global things are happening, but we don't really care about the rest of the world in these movies. And I appreciate that. We follow one family, fuck everybody else. Good for you. Um, and so this is Greenland 2. Hold on, hold on.

SPEAKER_03 2:29

So if Greenland 1, do they go, do they go to like a big boat and then get on a big boat that survives in the water? Was that a different movie we did? That is a different movie. That's so funny. That is 2012. I was thinking this was the sequel to the boat movie, and I'm like, where's the boat? Did we just we lose the boat?

SPEAKER_01 2:50

So it's not super different. That's why it's so funny to me because they spend that so that's the John Cusack 2012 movie, and they're driving in a limo to get to a boat that survives the flood. And in the and in Greenland, they're driving to a bunker, just a bunker. So they just so it's just like a hangout.

SPEAKER_03 3:11

So the bunker they're in in this movie was the bunker they drove to.

SPEAKER_01 3:14

Oh, okay. What is interesting is at the end of Greenland 1, they opened the bunker and they're like, it's been nine months and there's no sign of radiation. And then birds like fly by and they're like, Life will begin again. And then this movie, they're like, There's so much radiation everywhere. What are we gonna do? And I was like, uh oh. That's not right, guys. You set that up differently, but it's cool.

SPEAKER_03 3:38

So we're doing Greenland 2 migration.

SPEAKER_01 3:40

Sorry, yes.

SPEAKER_03 3:41

Or if you're reading the titles, Greenland coal Green Greenland colon migration. They left the two out in the titles.

SPEAKER_01 3:48

They left the two out. You don't need two, they get it.

unknown 3:50

People get it.

SPEAKER_03 3:51

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 3:52

We know.

SPEAKER_03 3:53

So in this one, they have to leave the bunker and then go to France.

SPEAKER_01 4:00

In 22 hours, I think, give or take. Really quick. They're going really fast. Oh, it's a little longer. It's like three days, I think.

SPEAKER_03 4:08

Are you sure? Oh, maybe four days. I don't know. I mean, the boat trip from Greenland to the UK.

SPEAKER_01 4:14

About 15 minutes, as far as I can tell.

SPEAKER_03 4:17

It's gonna take some time.

SPEAKER_01 4:20

I don't think so, Dan. I don't think so. It was about 30 seconds of movie time, so I don't think it could be that long.

SPEAKER_02 4:27

Now do you have anything to say about this movie?

SPEAKER_01 4:32

I have a ton to say about this movie, but most of it is in conjunction with the first one. How different the two are, in my opinion. Okay. Um, but this this is one of those movies, and I don't remember if you told me this or if I read this somewhere, but there's in writing, you always want to write something that's like this happens because this happens.

SPEAKER_03 4:54

Sure, sure.

SPEAKER_01 4:56

Or this happens so this happens. Yes, so that's what you told me this. Yeah. This is a movie that writes the then. This happens, then this happens, and then this happens, and then maybe this happens. I don't really know or care. It's so disjointed between it's like its scenes, and it's it happens so quickly. We don't live in anything. People die, and we just like, okay, forget that guy. We'll go on to the next guy. Oh, now he's that up. See you later. And I know that movies do that. I know we kill the side characters, but usually there's maybe some sort of emotional weight to people that you've spent time with in the movie. These people don't care about anybody but themselves. And uh, I guess I love that. Good for them.

SPEAKER_03 5:41

Well, it's like when the one, when the final person from the bunker that's with them, the woman, she dies, and you're like, I have no idea what her name is. You know, I I really have no idea what her name is.

SPEAKER_01 5:53

Sure don't. Nope. I don't know anything about her other than she just was tagging along. That's it. She's just, you know, there as a resource that we can kill later for no reason whatsoever. What was that? What was that? Although her death was cool, I will say that. Her death was my favorite death in the movie. Then she just gets shot in the back of the but you but they're just driving, they're playing games in the van, and all of a sudden the window shatters and she slumps. And I was like, damn, that was cool. If I cared about her, even just a little bit, if I knew her name, if I knew why she was a part of this group, if I cared about her whatsoever, that would have been a really hard moment. Instead, I just laughed. But uh, you know, it I think it could have been good if you would have made a better movie. It's a sm it's a fun idea for a scene.

SPEAKER_03 6:45

There's one of these, there's one of these zombie movies. I think it's one of the UK ones, and the the people are there's like they end up kind of going towards this one high-rise building where they see a light up in there, and they're they have to navigate the stairwell, and there's people, you know, and they have to get in, and then they eventually have to leave, and then they have to trek somewhere, and you know, you meet in in a movie like that, you're constantly meeting these truly colorful characters. Yeah. Who you sort of you get thrown in with, and then they die, and you're like, oh shit, I I like that person, or this person dies, or this person, you know, you're like, that's what these movies are supposed to be like.

SPEAKER_01 7:23

Well, I mean, Walking Dead made what eight seasons of that conceit. That one that one tool they've stretched out for 10 years, and people were like, Yeah, this is a good show. I still like it. So you could do it for 90 minutes.

SPEAKER_03 7:39

It's possible. You gotta come up with some characters and situations that you're like, oh, I'm interested to be here. There's there's a conflict in this place as opposed to I arrived here, the person's nice, the person feeds us, the person gives us a vehicle, we leave. That's correct. That movie, that's what happens in this movie three or four times, and that is that is literally the whole movie. There's almost nothing to critique in this movie because there's no conflict in this movie.

The Confusing War Ending Explained

SPEAKER_01 8:05

That is correct. The only thing that I would critique, and maybe you can explain it to me. I don't understand the end of this movie, Dan. Like, full stop, the last 25 minutes is confounding to me. Who's at war?

SPEAKER_03 8:20

Oh, the the the evil, the Ruskies are are coming to take the West's lands.

SPEAKER_04 8:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 8:27

What which lands? Why? Oh what are we talking about?

SPEAKER_01 8:30

So the here's the let me tell you the premise of the movie. Right. Please, please, God, someone explain this to me. Because I'm watching this and I'm like, I who it's why are these people shooting each other? Okay.

SPEAKER_03 8:41

No, it makes it I shouldn't say something crazy like it makes perfect sense.

SPEAKER_01 8:46

But this is the best movie ever written. It makes perfect sense.

SPEAKER_03 8:52

Okay. The concept is Is this five years after the first one?

SPEAKER_01 8:58

Yeah, somehow, yeah. So it's five years. Five years. Don't quite understand.

SPEAKER_03 9:01

Did they have the kid in the first movie? Were they traveling with the kids?

SPEAKER_01 9:04

Yeah, he's a child. Yeah. Oh, dude. You should, yeah, yeah, it's good. He's diabetic and they forget his medicine, and then they don't get to go on the plane because he's diabetic and they're not allowing people with diseases into the bunker because you're just gonna be uh trouble. So they actually get kicked out of the plane that goes to the bunker, which is great because those planes explode anyhow. It's pretty fun. Yeah, it's pretty fun. They actually do some stuff where there is they do some stuff, make a few more choices. That's all I'm gonna say. This is five, six years in real time as well. He had a lot of time to think about like, hey, what could happen? What are some cool things? And instead, we didn't do that. I'm sorry, yeah, explain to me the idea.

SPEAKER_03 9:45

The idea is a comet hit hit the world, and then that upheavaled and caused problems and killed a lot of people, and also screwed up the ecosystem, also caused problems, atmospheric problems, which you know, if you had volcanoes going off, it could put a lot of garbage into the air. It's probably bad. That could, you know, that could exacerbate your asthma and whatnot. Um, the comet didn't just come down and do its thing, the comet also left other bitty comets up there that decide to come down whenever they decide to come down, which is a thing that you'd be able to track probably and pay attention to, maybe who knows.

SPEAKER_01 10:23

Well, you probably could if we had an infrastructure, but that seems like it's gone. So who knows? Well, yes and no.

SPEAKER_03 10:30

So the idea is their their bunker falls apart at a certain point in the movie, and so then they have they the place they want to go to is the initial major impact. And in the five, and so the here we have boom, we have impact, we have a huge crater which has pushed up walls on all sides, and so magically there are tails that inside there the air is still good, so bad air outside, bad air can't get into the into this crater, and then in that crater, in addition to it being safe from that, it's also like a paradise because life has come back to you know, it's sort of churned up the ground, you know, like you plow the ground, and it's this is sort of a perfect area. So which I do all the time in my video games, so I get it. The Western the there's so the West, since it's in France, that counts as Europe slash the West. So they want to control this, you know, it's gonna be like the breadbasket. You know, that was the whole thing like America, is we had the Midwest, and that was the breadbasket where all the wheat was grown and all that, and that was that was the important part of America for a long time. Now technology is supportive, yeah. Now we don't care. Um the idea is that the Ruskies are coming down from the east and they're trying to take it over with their military forces.

SPEAKER_01 11:57

But they're not really. Yeah, they are sort of. You know what I mean? Well, I mean sort of is the right answer because once you're into the valley, there's nothing. Nothing was happening. There's no fighting. Oh, it's green.

SPEAKER_03 12:09

Oh, yeah, no, no, no. Because they they can't because they're protecting it.

SPEAKER_01 12:13

Yeah, I just don't bel I don't buy that. I don't buy that uh at all, it turns out. You're telling me they're they're protecting 360. I I don't think so. And then it also doesn't feel like there's any civilization in there.

SPEAKER_03 12:27

You're looking at logistically. I'm sure there's people living in little houses down there because they're sorry.

SPEAKER_01 12:32

I am looking at it logistically because we walked through, quote, a war zone. And I was like, is the whole thing a war zone? Because once you get into the canyon, there's no war. There's nothing. I just don't buy it.

SPEAKER_03 12:44

Well, it doesn't, it doesn't w war is so different. You'd have to postulate a very different true scenario of war, right?

SPEAKER_00 12:56

Sure.

SPEAKER_03 12:57

You know, because every sort of era of war is is fought in a different way, right? You know, like World War I was trench warfare, very specific places where they they fought over 20 yards of of things for 10 years, like, oh, I moved one foot forward, ah, we got pushed back, you know. So, and that was one of borders and all that. But then, you know, after that, then you had uh V-2 rockets and you had bigger rockets and you had B-52s that could fly very far in the sky and then blow up things, you know. So it's every war, you know, now we're in a war and it's it's the truth, it's all about drones. The drone, you know, the the entire shape of the military in the next 10 years is going to be completely different. It's going to be completely different than what it was 10 years ago. It's like all the all the things that we're like, this is the important thing. It's it no longer is that way if you want to like do it, you know, smaller scale wars, you know. So war's always changing, and they did not really postulate a new way for this war to occur, and it doesn't make any sense. You know, what it should be is that there's you know, fiefdoms. You know, we always do in these things, and every one of these is you have fiefdoms where it's like we we go back the way the way it used to be, where it's like I'm I'm an asshole and I control this amount of space, or I'm a good guy and I built a wall and I'm keeping the assholes out. That is how every post-apocalyptic has ever worked.

SPEAKER_01 14:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 14:30

Because it it because that's what would happen.

SPEAKER_01 14:34

Yeah, we yeah, we like to group together.

SPEAKER_03 14:36

Yeah, and in this movie, um anytime we start talking about um the the use of what uh your material goods, right? Because that's what it is about. In the future, it's like whoever has the food is gonna be in control, whoever has the guns is gonna be in control. They've decided to write Dan Goodsell lines in to completely invalidate that concept.

SPEAKER_01 15:04

And I listen, which is insane. I respect insane. It is insane because I respect the notion of the Dan Goodsell line.

SPEAKER_03 15:12

I can respect it where you're like No no no, the Dan Goods, the Dan Goodsell line still works, but it just doesn't make any sense now.

SPEAKER_01 15:19

Right. So this is my this is what I'm saying. Like, you can write the Dan Goodsell line, and I'll respect it because what the Dan Goodsell, if you're new to the show, by the way, what we're calling the Dan Goodsell line is when something uh strange is occurring and you do one line in your movie to explain it away in a way that doesn't really make sense, but the audience is like, okay, they told me, they told me what it is, and now I have to go along for that ride.

SPEAKER_03 15:42

It's it's it's addressing the thing so that you don't sit there going like, what the fuck?

SPEAKER_01 15:46

What the what is happening? You gotta tell me something. And I respect it, and normally I'm all on board with it. But if when it doesn't make any sense whatsoever, even a line, I'm like, no, I'm sorry, that's not gonna work for me. And I think the part the problem is the first movie, while obviously it is very it's wild, it's ambitious, right? It still feels grounded, and everything in that movie to me makes a a monicum of sense. Okay. This movie, I'm like, what are we talking about? What are you you can't just say that and I'm gonna believe you because this is crazy. Everything that happens is too wild in this movie, it's too much.

Bunker Logic Problems And Fake Stakes

SPEAKER_03 16:30

Well, um and then like no no this movie starts with your classic thing you start the movie with, which is sending your character out into the wasteland to do something, and that something is usually go get food, right? That's what you always do. You send them out, they're going to go look for food, they're going to pick food back up and then bring it back. And that's the proof that that this surviv this thing is surviving. This movie instead has them doing yoga and then saying we had two years of supplies and we just we just stretched them out to five years.

SPEAKER_01 17:08

That's that is what he said. We had two years of of stuff and we've stretched it to five years. That's not how anything works. You can't just say, well, we made it last for five years because fuck you.

SPEAKER_03 17:23

And you got time for yoga, you got time for fucking yoga.

SPEAKER_01 17:27

Everyone's pretty healthy from what I can tell. No one's like malnourished, no one's walking around like they've been starving for three years. They're fine. They're totally fine. Now, if you put that line in and then you executed people, like if you had some sort of lottery where people were just like, sorry, we're we gotta get rid of some rations, pa pow, you're dead. Then I'm like, okay, I believe it. You can't just make two years of rations last five years. That's too long. Maybe two to three, I could believe. Two to five is more than double. That doesn't work. It's crazy.

SPEAKER_03 18:04

And it's and it's unnecessary. You can just say we got we have five years of rations and we're running out.

SPEAKER_01 18:13

Also, or we need to what your bunker collapses. That's your catalyst for people leaving. Why do you also need the food thing? Just say we're doing fine, we're doing great. We have a food source, and then your your thing collapses and you have to leave. Great. It's the same thing they do with Gerard Butler's character where he's dying of radiation poisoning, and then we're just gonna shoot him. So that doesn't matter, anyhow. Why is why do two things have to be happening at the same time? It's very weird to me.

SPEAKER_03 18:44

Oh, because they're they're trying, I mean, they're they're doing your classic thing, they're making up stakes, right? To say that they're running out of food, that means they're stakes, but then those stakes don't don't mean anything to the movie, right? If you correct, if you make stakes and then don't make them part of the movie, you then the stakes just they just evaporate. They're just like, oh, okay.

SPEAKER_01 19:08

Why can't we just be like, well, we're out of food? Shit. We're out of food. We gotta go, guys. We have no food. We have two weeks' rations left. Take it, and we're migrating.

Plot Walkthrough Starts From The Top

SPEAKER_03 19:18

Okay. And that's what you do. That's you know, it's like he w Okay, let's talk about the movie. Um Okay. Greenland 2 Migration, 2026, hour and 30i. We start with somber music, comet hits, 75% of the world is gone. Five years later, fragments still coming back. They're forced to be inside. But there are green areas, life is fighting back. We have a couple of photos of like a melted Eiffel Tower and a couple other things falling apart, and then we have like a little montage of the bunker, and they're doing yoga, and you're just like, Okay.

SPEAKER_01 20:01

Yeah, just just weird stuff, you know, it's fine.

SPEAKER_03 20:04

Um, our boy John, Gerard Butler, is out there on the surface wearing a mask, wearing a thing. The weather's fine, he's going down towards the ocean.

SPEAKER_01 20:14

Real quick, why why is he outside? We never really address this. And I understand that it's probably not a big deal to a lot of people, but to me, this is a big deal because it sets up right away that this movie has no idea what the frick it's doing. He's an engineer, he's a structural engineer. That's why he was chosen to go on to into the bunker because he can build things. Do stuff. Why is he outside?

SPEAKER_03 20:39

Well, I mean, in a in the re in the correct movie, he's there to find some new conveyance because they're gonna have to leave the bunker because they're running out of food.

SPEAKER_01 20:47

That's great, but he's not. So why is he outside, Dan? Can you tell me why he's outside right now? No, you can't.

SPEAKER_03 20:54

Well, if I'm writing the movie You didn't write this movie, so he gets down to the he gets to the ocean and then there's he says there's a few lifeboats, which I I me have they never seen these lifeboats before?

SPEAKER_01 21:07

I'm confused.

SPEAKER_03 21:07

Yeah, I think they're new. I think they've they've they've come in, you know, those the the the tides have brought them in. You know, like like drift driftwood they've got. Sure, the driftwoods. Yeah. And if you're writing the movie where they're where they're trying to escape, he needs to go on to these and set up that there's gas in them.

SPEAKER_01 21:27

They work.

SPEAKER_03 21:27

And they work. So later on in the movie, when they have gas in them and they work, we go, oh. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_01 21:35

Yeah, that makes sense. You you did the thing before, so I believe you.

SPEAKER_03 21:38

He set it up. So when when they when they start driving these things, I was like, wait, what's happening?

SPEAKER_01 21:43

This this water's a great that's a great question. We said the same thing. We're like, I they just know they're gonna turn on this field, they're all running for these boats that they've never tried tested before. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 21:54

And everybody knows to run to the sea where there's light boats are gonna be. Where they're going. Like, I would not necessarily run to the sea. I don't know where I'd run.

SPEAKER_01 22:04

I'd be like, I'd run to these green areas they keep talking about because we don't really ever see those in real persons.

SPEAKER_03 22:11

Well, we kind of do. We see that one forest and no one cares about the forest.

SPEAKER_01 22:15

Which is weird. If you know, you would think that they would care. I don't know. I don't get I don't get a lot of the things of this movie.

SPEAKER_03 22:22

Then he sees a big dis big destroyer that sort of crashed, which he says is was not there before he climbs up the on the destroyer. You're like, well, he should be looking for medicine, food, guns, all the things you look for. What does he look for, Tony?

SPEAKER_01 22:36

A wrench? He's looking for a toolbox, I think. Is that what he's looking for? No, no. All right. What's he looking? A notebook?

SPEAKER_03 22:45

A flower? Notebook. Notebook with a pressed flower that tells them that you know life might be okay, I guess.

SPEAKER_01 22:53

He never reads he never reads from the notebook either, right? He he just That would be an interesting conceit though, Dan. I like that. Like he opens the thing and he's like, oh, it's a flower. Where is this from? Let me read this book. Oh, this place has flowers. Nope, that doesn't happen. What a great idea that would have been, Dan.

SPEAKER_03 23:10

And the and the bodies look like they're mummified or something? I don't know. 100%.

SPEAKER_01 23:14

Yeah, I don't really understand what's going on with that. A couple hundred years maybe they've been dead. I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 23:19

And I mean the hole is breached. So if it the hole was breached out in the middle of the ocean, it would have just been in the bottom of the ocean. So somehow it got to be.

SPEAKER_01 23:32

Don't worry about it.

SPEAKER_03 23:33

So did this thing get hit by the meteors? Did it get hit by the meteors here? We don't know. He doesn't say anything.

SPEAKER_01 23:39

We don't know anything because he doesn't really look around the ship. We don't like to we don't really like to figure things out in this movie.

SPEAKER_03 23:45

He also has like somebody on the comms like talking to him. How are you doing there, John? Never meet that person, never have a relationship with that person.

SPEAKER_01 23:54

Don't know who that person is. No. I wouldn't worry about him too much. Well, to be fair, he's really bad at his job. Which is what we're about to get to right now. No, he's good at his job. Okay. No, he's terrible at his job because the next scene he's like, oh, by the way, you're in a storm. You're dead. You're dead, John. Sorry, bud.

SPEAKER_03 24:12

But the storm comes up. That wasn't supposed to come up. It comes up in 30 seconds. He starts running it. You know, it's like it's like shooting lightning bolts at his ass. Woo woo woo woo-woo woo. They sort of open a door halfway and then they're like, Yeah, you're not gonna make it. Sorry, John. You took a risk. We're not we're not risking you, we're leaving you outside to die.

SPEAKER_01 24:33

Here's my problem. What's your problem? We get to see the storm, he's running almost as fast as the storm.

SPEAKER_04 24:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 24:41

So you're telling me that storm snuck up on you guys? Well it's not that fast of a storm. It moved fast over the water. I I just don't buy it. I just don't buy it. The unpredictable, the guy is if it's even close, you gotta be like, hey, you gotta get back, dude. You gotta get back. You never know with these storms that are unpredictable. I mean it's ridiculous.

SPEAKER_03 25:06

If you were writing the movie to make it tense and interesting, yes, you would do those things.

SPEAKER_01 25:11

You would just have him stay out longer because he found something or is on the trail of something. It's like they're like, John, you gotta go. The storm's coming. He's like, I gotta, I'm almost there. You gotta blah, blah, blah. Wait, hold on. And then he's caught in the storm. Don't be like, oh shit, we don't know what happened. The storm's on top of you. You're dead. You're dead now, John. Sorry, bud.

SPEAKER_03 25:30

It's so dumb. He could have been in the medical office trying to get his son insulin, which the kid needs. Which the kid has somehow had insulin for five years. Diabetes for five years, and it's had no effect. Um, yeah, I did not like that when they when they said he had diabetes, and I was like, I mean, and that's why you give people that's why you give them the asthma, right? Because you're gonna probably survive asthma. Diabetes, I don't know. You know, I probably wouldn't survive.

SPEAKER_01 26:00

It was it's it was really interesting in the first movie because it the forgetting the medicine is what separates them because he needs the medicine to live. And then when she tells the other dudes at the base, she's like, hey, my son, my husband went to get my son's medicine, and they're like, medicine? What medicine? That's not on that's not on the chart. You can't go, and then they kick them out. It's a really nice moment, but then you're like, okay, but now he's been in a bunker for five years. How is he alive? Yeah, I don't understand.

SPEAKER_03 26:30

You gotta set up a thing where it's like, oh, we've got synthetic insulin. You gotta say some words, you gotta give us a couple words. The Dan Good Sound line. Give it to me. I mean, those those are words, yeah. They're like, uh, lucky we have a chemistry lab here where we can make synthetic insulin. Boom. Great. I'm gonna be like, I don't know what that is. I don't know how you do that, but uh maybe you can be making it.

SPEAKER_01 26:50

I believe you, but you're telling me that it's working, so fine. We'll we'll go with it.

Civil War Talk And Therapy Setup

SPEAKER_03 26:54

Yeah, maybe you could take an avocado and squeeze it and insulin squirts out. I don't know. I don't know these things. It's science. Um it's science. So we have the we have the big meeting of the the big people. Um, they're out of supplies, everyone is grim, there's radiation, Dr. Emira.

SPEAKER_01 27:10

I guess. How were how is she the big people? She's nobody. She didn't even get invited into the thick into the bunker. She's only there because she's his family. He got invited because he's a builder, and you just get to bring your family. That's it. She leaves. She's not important. There's army people in there in the bunker. It's so weird. None of this makes any sense.

SPEAKER_03 27:33

And once again, we have we we also do not set up any bunker dynamics. So we don't have we don't have the army guy that's like, well, that's just happening, god damn it. And then we have the civilians that are like, shut up, army guy. You just always want to tell everybody what to do.

SPEAKER_01 27:46

We don't we don't have any of the any of that. I love in this scene though, she gets the line. We put it to the vote like we always do. I was like, what are you talking about? Who's voting? Who decided that you get to vote? None of this makes any sense. Oh, we have well, I think that's later. We haven't there yet. I'm not there yet. I'm jumping all over that. I told you I have a lot to say. I have a lot to say to say about this movie. I didn't like this movie very much. It was very frustrating to me.

SPEAKER_03 28:11

I found it inoffensive.

SPEAKER_01 28:15

Um that's totally fine. That's 100%. It's it's a completely mediocre movie. You know what I mean? But it should have been better. I think there's some setups here that are really nice. It's like, but you didn't care enough to write out a real movie.

SPEAKER_03 28:31

There were never any good setups because this movie.

unknown 28:35

No.

SPEAKER_03 28:35

Okay, so they're like, we gotta get to there's a the one place we could go is the crater in France. It's a safe zone. And she then she's like, but I think there's a civil war in Europe. Well, first of all, they have radios, so they're talking to everybody. So they're you're gonna know exactly what's happening everywhere. But more importantly, everyone should know. Tony, explain to me a civil war.

SPEAKER_01 28:56

Well, uh well, damn, don't put me on the spot with real definitions of things. Civil war is when uh within your country multiple factions are fighting each other. So something like that.

SPEAKER_03 29:08

Civil war superheroes, it's all the superheroes fighting, and civil war America. Great movie. Uh North versus South, good versus evil. Um and that's a civil war. This is not a you can't have a global civil war. That's the whole idea. If it's East versus West, that's just a war.

SPEAKER_01 29:25

It's just a war. Yeah, it's just war. We're just having a war. Don't worry about it.

SPEAKER_02 29:29

And that that means civil war is such a specific thing. You can't say civil war. It's like dumb.

SPEAKER_03 29:37

And and and the point is, every time you say something dumb like that, you're losing people. You're losing people. 100%. And that's the whole idea of a movie, a comedy, any anything.

SPEAKER_01 29:48

Yeah, once you've lost everyone. You're not getting any of us back, and we're just slowly dropping like flies throughout the movie. There's no one left at the end of this movie. Guaranteed. I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_03 29:58

I don't think so. Um, okay. Uh John goes and talks to his therapist.

SPEAKER_01 30:05

I thought this was an interesting line that we don't even care to delve into. Is uh the therapist gets says, Why do you think so many more therapists are here than doctors or whatever? And it's like, because everyone is gonna be going through some shit. Nobody seems like they're going through much trauma, if I'm being completely honest. They all seem really fine, they seem really good. But I I thought the idea of everyone needing a therapist, even the therapists need therapists, because everyone's going through some fucking shit right now. We're locked in a bunker for five years. I thought that was interesting. We didn't deal with it. We don't really care.

SPEAKER_03 30:47

Um if you have a therapist, then you have to have a guy going wacko that opens the door, does something wrong. You gotta have somebody doing something dumb. I gotta get out of here. And he opens leaves the door open, and that's what causes the person, and that's what causes the storm gets in, you know, right? Their whole their whole the the lightning shoots in, it cut you kind of you you you're setting stuff up, but then you're never you're never thinking about it.

SPEAKER_01 31:13

That's what I'm saying. There are ideas in here, Dan, that I think would make a very interesting movie, but we don't do those ideas. Instead, it's an earthquake, shatters our entire bunker, our underground bunker that we built specifically to outlast the biggest meteor storm in the world. It's great stuff.

SPEAKER_03 31:32

There's an earthquake. Uh so so we find out that there's people in caves like 50 miles away, and this is when we sort of decide what we should do, and they're like, we gotta go save them.

SPEAKER_02 31:45

Wrong. What? No.

SPEAKER_03 31:47

No already wrong. That's wrong. And why actually why is it why is it wrong for for for the characters and for the movie? Both things it's wrong for.

SPEAKER_01 32:00

Well, I'll start with uh just in my general view why it's wrong, because you're you've you've stretched your two-year rations to five years, which one is impossible. So now you're adding 50 plus more mouths. That's insane behavior. That doesn't make any sense. This bunker was built for X amount of people. And I know because I saw the first movie, you're already overbooked because a bunch of people came and at the end of that movie they let everybody in because the meteors were coming and they're like, fuck it, everyone come inside. There wasn't enough room for everybody to begin with. We don't get to see this, but this should not be a comfortable experience for anybody. This should be people are sleeping on the ground already. Not everyone should have a bed or a domicile. Like, it should be terrible conditions. More people is bad. One, two, we don't know these people. There are bad people all over the place. What those people should do is come in and fuck shit up. We should vote yes, and they should come in and start killing people and stealing our stuff. That's what should really happen. It doesn't. Um, and then the characters should be more worried about themselves. And I know that that's a stupid, that's people don't want to hear that. People are probably on board with people voting to bring other people in. Oh, they're being good people. Fuck that. This is the post-apocalyptic world. You gotta be careful. You got a 12, 15-year-old son. I actually don't can't do the math. I think he's probably mid-teens now. You know, he can't have strangers coming in and threatening your way of life. Like, we are good. I don't know. That's how I feel. I'm a bad person. That kid's totally getting raped. Yeah, he maybe he's into it. I don't know. But it's bad. It's bad. It's all bad. Why do you why do you think that it's bad?

SPEAKER_03 33:45

Well, well, because it doesn't set up any conflict, right? Oh, well, that's when you when you all vote and you're all like, oh, just let him in. Uh, okay. And then what? If if you're gonna let him in, yes, then there has to be there has to be consequences for things that happen. There aren't consequences. The the the meteor storm just does something and and things continue.

SPEAKER_01 34:06

And this is this happens several times throughout the movie where there's something that you could set up, but instead you're just like, and then meteors hit. And it's like, I get that you said that that's happening, but maybe just make this movie more about the people and what they're going through, as opposed to, and now meteors hit, and that changes the course of everything.

SPEAKER_03 34:29

Uh we do a bunker I know. We do a bunker life montage, they listen to Michael McDonald, he fixes the water we want to do.

SPEAKER_01 34:38

Just FYI. They're all thrilled to be there.

SPEAKER_03 34:40

We do more yoga. The family hangs out at the bunker cafe, you know, there's room for a cafe. It seems pretty cool. There's a dance. Like, I mean, there was a dance, wasn't there? Um, we find out that the kid has been sneaking outside. That's insane. You can't sneak outside. There's no way to sneak outside.

SPEAKER_01 35:01

There's like there's it's not like there's just a door or a window you can crawl out of. It's not a thing.

SPEAKER_03 35:08

And if he's sneaking outside, well then he has to have a secret way out, and then they're gonna have to use that secret way out. And that's great. And it's the reason why the reason why we do these things, these some of them are tropes, but if you set something up, you gotta tell the joke. You can't just have a stand-up set that's all set up. And then just walk out the door. It'd be very funny.

SPEAKER_01 35:32

But I was just gonna say Dan. If you could do that just one time, I think that would that would go down in history as one of the best sets ever. People would be serious, but in the way that it's like, fuck you, I respect it, but I hate you.

SPEAKER_03 35:47

What the fuck?

SPEAKER_01 35:48

I think you should work on that, dude.

SPEAKER_03 35:49

True anti-comedian. Um but yeah, you know, you because you're setting up a thing, you're putting an expectation in our minds. It's like he's going out, why is he going out? What does that mean? And then why is he going out? Yeah. Uh, because we don't think they can. We think the only way in is through this big, this big metal thing that has to come out.

SPEAKER_01 36:09

I know that he can't go out because they have to let Gerard Butler in through this giant door that's opening and closing. We've said they're saying there's not just a way to get in and out. It's not a thing. And if there is, you're right. You have to use it because otherwise it's crazy. And right now I'm on the crazy camp. I don't understand it. So, my in my head, he's got some sort of army friends that are like letting him out. You know, they're like, Yeah, go for a walk, kid. We love you, blah, blah, blah. And then that's someone's gonna get killed that way. I'm yeah. Um, we all 50 people should take the kid hostage when he's out for a moon walk. You know what I mean? Bullshit.

SPEAKER_03 36:45

Um, and we we also set up that he's sort of in love with this one girl who we then never see again, and we never have to resolve her death.

SPEAKER_01 36:52

She's super dead. I wouldn't worry about it. Um there's absolutely no reason for that to happen because he doesn't seem to care, and then he gets a new French girlfriend, so it's fine.

SPEAKER_03 37:01

Yeah. Nathan, the kid, is into the stars. He multiple multiple times talks about the stars. We never use the stars for navigation or anything. His star knowledge is worthless.

SPEAKER_01 37:12

No, it's about to get him laid. Oh. When he's talking with the French girl and he's like, look at these stars, and she's like, Wee, you're loving the stars, you know, that's that's working. But you're right, it's absolutely useless knowledge. I don't I don't get it. I don't know. John has a cough. That was pretty good. You and Gerard are equal. Equal acting.

Escape, Lifeboats, And The Ocean Drift

SPEAKER_03 37:36

Boom, it's the day that they're going to be receiving the migrants, they call them. The migrants. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 37:43

That's it's such a weirdly loaded word. Yes, it is. Yes, it is. As if they're trying to make a statement about the world, but they can't, because they're not smart enough.

SPEAKER_03 37:53

Boom! They start shaking. Boom! He's able to navigate the entire bunker, find his wife and his kid, and get them to pack bags. And yes, did you get your insulin? Okay.

SPEAKER_01 38:07

Gotta uh although it doesn't really come into play this this movie like it did in the first movie.

SPEAKER_03 38:13

Yeah. Uh they crawl out some other secret exit that Gerard just knows where it is. They get to the beach, everybody's at the beach. Uh we sort of almost lost the kid, but we didn't. They lose, they get their masks stolen, they lose their masks, and now we have the two lifeboats. The one lifeboat people are sort of fighting over, they're also going to the second lifeboat. They somehow get to the second lifeboat, all get inside, and then that lifeboat is able to just sort of putt-putt away with very much it's pretty easy. One-fifth of the amount of people you could have gotten in that lifeboat.

SPEAKER_01 38:53

Yep. Oh, easy. Yeah, yeah. I mean, they all had seats, like they're all sitting comfortable. They didn't want to be uncomfortable for the journey. It's like how I feel in an airplane. I would, if I could, I would buy out an entire row. Because I'm just, I don't want people in my space. So I feel the same way. I would five, six people on that boat, I would have shut the door. I'd be like, no, we're good. I gotta be able to put my feet up, people. We got a long way to France. I need to put my feet up here.

SPEAKER_03 39:20

It's ridiculous. It just doesn't make any sense. And we do we do that, we do that again on the bus, that they didn't want to let him on the bus at the end. Once again, there's one army guy standing up, everybody else seated. It's like yeah, you can't you can't stand in the aisle.

SPEAKER_01 39:34

Are you kidding me?

SPEAKER_03 39:36

If you've got in the old days, when I in the olden times, when I went to South America, I traveled by bus when you're there. And when when you get on a South American bus, they've throw everything on the top, and it's it's it's insane. It's pandemonium. I mean, not in a bad way, but you know, this just people will just like get on, ride for six miles, standing up there talking to the driver, then they'll get off. It's like it's a giant process. It's not like this stuff, you're just like, this does not feel real.

SPEAKER_01 40:08

No, no, it's ridiculous. It's absolutely ridiculous.

SPEAKER_03 40:12

Okay, so I love it. Um they hit a big wave. Oh, big wave goes and kills everybody on the beach, so you don't have to worry about them. They're all dead.

SPEAKER_01 40:24

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't worry about those people. Now, is that the first time a big wave has ever hit, you think? Because this is the biggest earthquake they've had. I'm just curious.

SPEAKER_03 40:34

Um, they have to face a couple of giant sea waves. See, it should have been people hanging on to the boat. Then they should have hit these sea waves and the same thing.

SPEAKER_01 40:43

Because there were people hanging on the boat and then they just got off. Are you kidding me? No, you hang on to that boat until you're washed off. You don't just jump off, you're like, I guess I'll just wait for the next boat. Nope, there are no boats. You either get on or you're dead.

SPEAKER_03 40:58

Um, Alfred Hitchcock made a film called Life Boat, where the Nazis come, they sink a Western ship, and then the Western people get on the boat, and then they, you know, they're they they have limited rations, and you know, they people go crazy, people get old, and and sure, because of the space on the boat, for some reason some of the people have to hang off the boat in the water. And it's it's FNA. It's it's fucked up. It is like you're like, I would not want to have to be one of the people in the water, I would want to be on the boat. And you know, like the there's like the they pick up, I think they pick up a German, one of the Germ, a German guy, and then he he like has a hidden candy bar, and they almost kill him because he has a candy bar that he's you know this is this is what you do in a movie. You go, you know, if you're like, I've set up that there's these lifeboats, okay, go watch the Hitchcock movie Lifeboat and steal something from that.

SPEAKER_01 41:55

Or we'll just spend four, five minutes on a lifeboat, and then we'll move on.

SPEAKER_03 42:00

So they're going, they're going, they're going. The the engines break down, John fixes it, then they run out of gas. And Tony, what do they do when they run out of gas? They just float.

SPEAKER_01 42:12

They're just like, okay, cool.

SPEAKER_03 42:13

And then eventually they float to Liverpool, and what do they do?

SPEAKER_01 42:17

How far do you think this? I don't know, no, I don't know the world map. I'm just gonna tell you right now, how far are they going right now? A thousand miles maybe. Where are they going to the bathroom, you think? I was wondering this. Once they started floating and they're like, well, now it's gonna be days. What do you think you think they're just like in the ocean? Yeah, you probably just go on. Lean out over and you know, just wonderful.

SPEAKER_03 42:39

You're gonna stop going to the bathroom pretty quick because you don't got anything. You don't have anything in you, that's true. They have food on the boat, by the way. Somehow. Somehow. Somehow there's food on the boat. Somebody, I guess maybe he packed food when they packed their. Okay. So they get to Liverpool. Liverpool's underwater, like too way too deep. And what is the what is the thing that they pull out to push off of Liverpool? Some magical oars. Oars. Tony.

SPEAKER_01 43:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 43:10

What do you use oars for? Uh in my canoe. And what's that called?

SPEAKER_01 43:18

Paddling.

SPEAKER_03 43:19

Rowing. Is that right? Rowing. Tony. You're in a boat far from land. You have oars. What should you be doing with those oars?

SPEAKER_01 43:33

Nothing. You want to float. So this is a lot of people get confused about boats, Dan. Um essentially they float to where they need to be. Is that what you're gonna tell us? Exactly.

SPEAKER_03 43:43

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 43:44

You're given enough time, the current will take you wherever you need to go. Exactly where you want to go, not where the wind is going. It's exactly where you want to go because you will it. It's a willpower thing. That's what people don't understand about boats. They think people are in control, weather's in control, it's willpower. It's willpower. Damn. So funny. I actually, it's weird because that never even crossed my mind. When they pulled those oars out, not even for a second when I was like by far the angriest part of the movie for me.

SPEAKER_03 44:10

I was just like, okay, you know, pull something out, but don't pull out an oar. And I think they call it an oar, don't they?

SPEAKER_01 44:18

Grab the oars. There's two of them. There's one on each side. It's it's literally built for what the situation they were in, and they never used them. I didn't even think about that. This is this is blowing my mind now. In retrospect, that's the craziest thing that's happened in this movie.

SPEAKER_03 44:34

It's the crazy thing that happens in the whole movie, in my opinion. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 44:38

Come on.

SPEAKER_03 44:38

Come on, guys. We have oars. Have a couple of. But just wait it out. Just wait it out, everybody. It's not like they couldn't, you know, and the and the other whole thing is like they reached Liverpool and they're all like, oh my god, we're it's in amongst buildings. You're like, so wait a second. So you're floating freely, not and you're just paying no attention? I mean not, no one's looking anywhere. There's gonna be one person that's you know, like, I'm gonna be up there like, where the fuck you take shifts.

SPEAKER_01 45:04

You have to take shifts and looking for stuff. What if someone comes and kills you? What if a different boat comes and like robs your food? You got it, someone's gotta be watching where you're going. They're just so surprised.

UK Bunker Gate And London Detour

SPEAKER_03 45:15

Wow, I guess good luck happened to us. Okay, so here we go. They they um they they get out and they so Liverpool's underwater, but then it's not underwater, and so they start walking through the the the UK that's not underwater, and they immediately they're like, Oh, wasn't there another one of these bunkers like within minutes walking distance from here? And they're like, Yes. So they go there and they start finding people. Here's people. They get to this fence, and the people are are ready to storm the fence, but there's guys with guns, and then they're like, only people that get into the bunker are people with badges, and they're like, We have badges, we have badges. And then we have a then they run up there and they're letting people in that have badges. I can't tell which of our characters have badges and don't have badges, which of our three main characters get in or don't get in. I thought we were splitting, I thought we were getting split. I think this was I thought this was a split.

SPEAKER_01 46:16

That's what you should have done because that's what they do in the first movie all the time is they keep splitting up the characters that have to find each other, but whatever, it's fine. Um, I as far as I could tell, the only person that had a badge was Morena, whatever her name is. Yeah. The mom. I as far as I can tell, nobody else had badges. She's the only one that got through the gate, and then she decided to go back out because she, you know, didn't want to be split up, I guess. It was very weird. I didn't I didn't understand what was happening, and then they just shot people, and then uh there you go. And then we leave.

SPEAKER_03 46:49

Yeah, we she doesn't go in, then they leave. Um, okay. So they so they shoot. Here's my question, right? So they have the obnoxious guy. There's an obnoxious guy.

SPEAKER_01 47:01

Yeah, the the weasley dude. They shoot him, and no one's sad about it. They're just they just leave him. So we we have a bunker. Our our friends had a bunker for five years. Yes. And I guess it's because the land is fucked up, and that's why there's nobody that's lives around there now. But then London or this place is fine, and so there's people outside? I didn't understand the whole conceit. I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 47:25

It may the comet didn't kill everybody, so there's a lot of people kicking around still.

SPEAKER_01 47:31

Right, but so like, why are we so upset? Like, if these people are living outside. Oh, but they're all gonna die from from breathing the stuff. Yeah, but they they're doing better than John is, as far as I can tell. Yeah, John's just John's, yeah. John's John's fucked. Let's just call it as it is.

SPEAKER_03 47:50

John's got he's got days to live because of this week.

SPEAKER_01 47:53

He said weeks. Weeks, okay.

SPEAKER_03 47:54

He said weeks to live. That's so these people are doing better than him. Hold on a second. What are weeks made up of? Um, hours. And what in between that?

SPEAKER_01 48:04

Minutes.

SPEAKER_03 48:06

No, no. In between hours. Not days.

SPEAKER_01 48:08

You're saying days, but it's like everyone has days to live. That's a big number. I've got at least 20. 25.

SPEAKER_03 48:18

Okay. So so they run they run away from the situation, and we're like, okay, I don't I don't know what's happening. They run into a dude with a van, and they're all like, if you could drive us to London, we'll give you our watches, and he's like, done. Cool. Cool, cool, cool. And once again, you're like, this is five years after this guy has gasoline.

SPEAKER_01 48:42

So much of it, too.

SPEAKER_03 48:44

He's not worried about it at all. I mean, if he had like a car that had like solar panels on the top, and you know, and and looked like some sort of Mad Max situation. Nope, nope, nope, nope. Just a gas-powered vehicle that somehow has gas after five years of there not being any gas made because gas is, you know, gas just.

SPEAKER_01 49:05

I mean it doesn't make any sense. The movie doesn't make any sense.

SPEAKER_03 49:10

And like, you know, he saw like, oh, of course, uh the couple of watches. You know, you know how many watches there would be? There'd be a million watches. You know how much clothes there would be? Million clothes. You gotta give him something, you gotta have something real to give him real? Yeah. Like like packs of cigarettes. You know, if he pulled out six packs of cigarettes, that dude would be like, that's fucking six packs of cigarettes. Cigarettes cigarettes would be money.

SPEAKER_01 49:35

Would be real, real money. It doesn't seem like it. Those also seem they're doing fine. Heroin, lots of cigarettes.

SPEAKER_03 49:41

Tabs of acid. This is stuff people need. Heroin. Right? Insulin. We're gonna give you our kids insulin. He's gonna die, but we're gonna and you're gonna be rich.

SPEAKER_01 49:52

No, watches. I I get no sense of what the new currency is. Oh, because they haven't made it. It can't just be money, right? Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 50:01

So they drive them to her their friend's house in London. His name is Obi. Um, they talk about dinosaurs, and uh he's been here 12 years. He says France is dangerous, they stop by a bunch of trees for an unknown reason, and then here come these meteors that travel right above your head. Yeah, except when they don't, they hold on to trees, the van gets boomed, and yeah.

SPEAKER_01 50:31

Well, you have to hold on to trees. You can't you can't be running because when you're running, they hone in on you. That's how meteors work. Exactly. They chase movement. So if you're on a tree, you're fine.

SPEAKER_03 50:42

Yeah, just like uh unmoving tree, not gonna hit that. I'll move out of the way. So the van gets hit, he gets blown up, they go back, van still works, gets his watch back. And yeah, didn't he get his watch back kind of vindictively?

SPEAKER_01 50:58

It's he felt excited, you know, like haha. Fuck you, Obi. Gotcha. Got him, and then he grabs his little booties. That's great. Oh no, it's boxing gloves.

Alzheimer’s Home And Terminal Reveal

SPEAKER_03 51:11

Oh, is that when they were boxing gloves? Okay, so they go to London, they go see their friend, they knock on the door, the friend is running, and Alzheimer's care home has electricity, and the government delivers her food for Alzheimer's patients. Now I respect that she's trying to care for people in the sure no.

SPEAKER_01 51:46

This is the dumbest thing ever. First, there's a line in there where she says something like some of them don't even know that the meteor hit. I was like, what? What are you talking about? Yeah, because they have Alzheimer's. Yeah, okay. I mean, I get it. I get it. Like they're like the literary one. Yeah, they're like, oh, they're lucky ones. No, I think they're the unlucky ones because then every day they have to relearn that the meteor came. So every day is the worst day of their lives. Um, this in a in a movie full of strange decisions. This is the weirdest thing that's happened. I don't understand. And if if you do have food and electricity, people are coming for you. And end of. Like you're not you're done. You can't fight back. You got 10 old people that can't remember their names. You're done. You're beat. We don't want to joking about Alzheimer's, but I'm sorry. I'm not I'm not I'm not saying that they are the the it just it wouldn't work.

SPEAKER_03 52:52

In the in the post-apocalyptic future, the the the the points of compassion have to be very small because uh everything is so harsh. That's the whole idea. You can't have people making giant compassionate moves because this world will crush them. And and to have them making these giant compassionate moves, you have to say something insane like, well, the government just brings us food. You're like, what the fuck are you talking about? What? What government? The people are trying to break into the government area and they're getting shot to death.

SPEAKER_01 53:25

They're not into it. So they don't have to be able to do that. They're bringing sense.

SPEAKER_03 53:29

They're bringing food to people that you know whose prognosis is not positive.

SPEAKER_01 53:34

Right. That was a very gentle way of saying that. I apologize if I offended anybody, but it's it's not city. I'm sorry. It's bananas.

SPEAKER_02 53:43

It just doesn't and and it's and it's for no purpose. If there was a purpose for it.

SPEAKER_01 53:50

To be that sh, hey, she's a good person. That's it. That's gotta be the only reason for this open. If you opened her door, she's a good person.

SPEAKER_03 53:58

That's it. That's a good point. Um, yeah, and what are they drinking? They're drinking wine. They have bottles of wine. Five years after there is no more wine. No.

SPEAKER_01 54:11

No, people are coming in, they're stealing that shit. That's a hot item.

SPEAKER_03 54:15

It's like in children of men, they they get the what's his name's House in the Forest, and he has like, I think he might have pulled out a bottle of wine, and he's just like, you know, you you we don't have a lot of these left.

SPEAKER_01 54:27

That's right. Wild stuff.

SPEAKER_03 54:32

Okay. Uh they're having good times with good friends, and then we cut to John coughing up blood in a sink. And what does John decide to do? Tell his wife that he has six weeks to live. Or cool. Uh 42 days.

SPEAKER_01 54:52

Look at you doing day math. Look at you. That's quick. That's quick. I can't even double check it because I don't know how to do math. Um I just this this whole John's dying thing, I think, is such a stupid move for two reasons. One, who cares? It's ridiculous. Um, it doesn't have any bearing on the story. You know what I mean? Because you're just gonna kill him. You kill him with a gunshot.

SPEAKER_03 55:21

And and now we we know they're but you see, we know they're gonna kill him. They know that now we're set up for a third act problem.

SPEAKER_01 55:30

That's my problem. So it's it's bad on two fronts. One, it's stupid because it doesn't have any impact on your story, and you're gonna kill him anyhow, right? In a different way. So this whole storyline means nothing. But also, you're setting up the audience to be like, well, he's gonna die at the end of this movie. Oh, that's gonna be sad. And then you kill him, and we're like, Yep, he died. You know what's sad is when you're like, oh shit, they're almost to freedom. Now he's dead. I had no idea he was dying. Now I'm sad. You can't just be like, he's gonna die, he's gonna die, he's gonna die, he's gonna die. Hey, he died. Don't give a shit. I do not care. There's no emotional weight to that whatsoever. The terminal guy terrible decision.

SPEAKER_03 56:12

Can't jump on the grenade. We know, we know. He's just like, eh, it's going a little earlier.

SPEAKER_01 56:17

Right? It's like, yeah, that's the right decision because you're dying anyhow. So I guess go out saving everybody. Thanks. What's more heroic is the guy that just made it to paradise with his family, and he's like, I gotta get them over that one last hump. I will sacrifice my life for them. The a life that I am planning to live for 30 to 40 more years, not four days. Ridiculous. Terrible decision, awful writing. It was great.

SPEAKER_03 56:44

It was great. And she's like, Why didn't you tell me? And you're like, Okay, I just didn't tell you. And then he's like, I don't want to die. We came all this way to die here. And then they're like, We have to get Nathan to the crater. What would have been funnier if they'd have killed the wife first, and then he's like coughing. And then he dies. He has to tell the kid. And then he then he he dies of his cough on the edge of the crater.

SPEAKER_01 57:09

You're like, and it's just the kid's. Now that's emotional. Wait, it's all he's got left. And then it's even funnier when the crater is empty. And the kid's there, and he's just like, well, now I'm dead, and they're all dead. Sorry. Greenland 3.

SPEAKER_03 57:24

Um uh amazingly, this woman has a car that works with gas, and she's like, eh, just everybody has cars, Tan.

SPEAKER_01 57:32

All right, you just have to get your head around that cars, not rare, they're super common. Everyone, there's 50 cars at the mountain that they get to. There's cars everywhere.

Dover Attack And Burning Calories

SPEAKER_03 57:42

Well, and then someone attacks you to steal your car. You're like, well, it just might happen. Only some gas. Okay, so they're gonna drive two hours to Dover. While they're there, they play I spy, the window gets shot out, they get attacked by a couple of marauders, they call them.

SPEAKER_01 57:58

Marauders. Just three, as far as I could tell. That's not much of a marauders group. I thought it was like one or two. I thought it was one or two. It might have just been two. I I thought maybe three, but it that's not that's not how marauders work. Um, also, here's a question. It's a two-hour drive. Yeah. Why are you driving at night? Why don't you just wait till the next morning? What the hell's wrong with you? Because then you don't have to do it. I don't even like driving at night in LA because I'm like, what if a critter runs in front of the road and I don't stop in time because it's dark? Just drive in the daytime. It's ridiculous.

SPEAKER_03 58:33

You afraid to drive at night, Tony.

SPEAKER_01 58:35

I I'm not afraid, I just don't like it. All right, there's a difference. Don't be afraid. You have headlights, don't you, in your car? I mean, I have headlights, but I don't have good eyes. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_03 58:47

You fade. Um, so they fight, they have a gun battle. Uh, Brainer backgrounds, Alice in character has to kill one of them.

SPEAKER_01 58:56

And she's a crack shot, one shot right to the head. Unbelievable.

SPEAKER_03 58:59

But the science lady died in the back, so we wait till the next morning and we spend our time and energy burying her. Tony, how many how many calories do you think it takes to bury someone?

SPEAKER_01 59:12

I don't know what words you just said. Calories. So I don't know You know what calories? Like calories. Okay. I thought you were saying some sort of fancy term. I didn't understand.

SPEAKER_03 59:25

The whole idea is in the future, it's a lot. In the apocalyptic future, we're all a bunch of fucking skeletons. And that's why in that one movie, The Road, for sure. They're eating people. Because they need whatever they can get. So you need to end up at the point where you're eating the peoples.

SPEAKER_01 59:41

Um but you you do have that would not last long in that future. Well, you know, you'd last quite a while. No, they'd be eating me up all day, man. I'm like a lunch for six weeks. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_03 59:52

You are the fetid calf. Um but you know, when people in these situations use use useless, you know, spend their calories on something that is useless.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:05

And time. Time consuming. They were just attacked. What are you talking about? Okay, well, now we're just gonna stay in the same spot for hours as we bury this woman? That's crazy. With what? Shovel? Just your hands. They're just they're just digging like dogs.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:22

Have you ever tried to dig in the soil with your hands?

SPEAKER_01 1:00:26

No, not with my hands. But we used to dig ditches all the time. We used to have to replace like water lines and stuff in my dad's park. So I digging sucks.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:34

Oh, tell us a funny story about you having to go over the and do work.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:38

That must sound funny. It's not really funny. I just, you know, we've I've dug holes, and digging holes is a terrible job. So now did you it's not fun. You had to dig dig out sewage lines and cool things like that. Yeah, sewage line, yeah, water lines, yeah, all sorts of stuff. Look at all these real, real man skills you have, Tony. It's great. No, no, no. So I barely did anything. You weren't talking, my brother does it, still does it. He sent me um, they had to dig up one, yes, two days, two days ago. Yeah. Because it was busted, and he was sending me pictures of the mud, and it's it's gross. It's gross mud. You mean it's like it's a sewage line. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, and he's like, I'm digging through this today. What are you doing? I was like, I'm just I'm just sitting at home playing Pokemon. I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:23

What is Tony doing? He's playing video games and working at a thing, you know, to a show that talks about sports.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:31

You're damn right I am. It's it's tough, it's a hard knock life for us. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:36

He's saying behind the scenes, making it so that that worthless people could talk about worthless sports that literally mean nothing.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:44

All right, they're sweet people. All right. We only hire good people, they're very nice. Uh yeah, my life, my life is not, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:53

They say anyhow, so it sucks. They say a prayer for the dead, and then I think they have to explain what prayers are to their child.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:01

Yeah, so he asks why people say prayers when people die. And I'm starting to think that maybe he's never seen a dead person. So has everyone that made it to the bunker, have they lived all five of those years? Nobody died?

SPEAKER_03 1:02:16

Maybe they maybe they didn't set tell him that anyone died and they were just eating them.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:22

That's all they lived five years. You eat your dead.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:25

Yeah. Amen. Well, Frankie, Frankie went to the other bunker in England.

Dry Channel And Chasm Crossing

SPEAKER_01 1:02:29

He's sent him off to the farm. Yeah, yeah, he's doing great. Here's a picture. Uh, very strange. I don't know. And the kid says he doesn't believe in heaven or something. So then later, when he says a prayer for his dad, it's supposed to be emotional. I don't know, man.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:45

So they get to the English Channel, and instead of there being a being a bunch of water there, it's dry because that doesn't make any sense. Um so they drive across the English Channel and they see a Spanish galleon, and I believe there was a giant whale corpse, a whale skeleton.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:06

I so I mistakenly thought it was dinosaur bones, and my wife had to tell me that nope, it was probably a whale.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:14

Yeah, Tony, there's still still extant dinosaur bones sitting on the bottom of the moose chain. That makes a lot of sense. That's just one that's where my head went. Dinosaur. Your wife's just like, who did I marry?

SPEAKER_01 1:03:27

What the fuck? What are you talking about, you idiot? Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:29

I don't spend enough time feeling sorry for your wife. Um I do.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:34

I feel sorry for her every day. Does that help?

SPEAKER_03 1:03:37

There's a bunch of cars stop, they get out, and lo and behold, there's a chasm, and they have to get across the chasm. Tony, do you want to talk about them getting across the chasm?

SPEAKER_01 1:03:47

Yeah, I guess I don't totally understand. We've tied ropes to each side from what I can tell, and then we've also laid out ladders. Yes, a what? On part of it.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:57

We drive we ro we go down one, I don't know, maybe a 12-foot ladder to where there's a rope bridge that they built. They rope bridge across, and then there's another uh then there's a little thing sticking out of the ground, and then they're two ladders going across, and one ladder's going across one way, and the one ladder's going the other way, and then of course all hell breaks loose while this you know they're they get Because I guess there's wind. Well there was there was wind, but then then then it all just decides to fall apart. You know, you do the wind first, you're like, oh okay, that could be the danger, but no, that's not enough danger. We're we're also gonna make the whole thing collapse.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:38

Right, because then there's another earthquake, sort of type thing. Right? So is this the first one that's happened since they built these bridges? This is the final one. Oh, okay, because it's the biggest one.

SPEAKER_03 1:04:50

You gotta always show up at the final moment of anything, right?

SPEAKER_01 1:04:54

It's just so weird. It's just so silly.

SPEAKER_03 1:04:57

You're always there when you know Carthage falls, or you know, you're always there on the right day. You're like, you look up, there go the Twin Towers. Not a good day to be in New York City. You know, that's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:07

Have you ever seen that Robert Pattinson movie? Speaking of that, I've seen a number of Pattinson movies. I don't think so. It's so it's I don't remember exactly what it's about, but it's you know, him and his dad have a strained relationship. Yeah and then at the very end of the movie, he goes to see his dad at work and then it zooms out and it's the twin, it's the tower. So you're like, what the fuck are you talking about? That's not what this movie was about at all. It is the most angry I've ever been in a movie in the history of movies. The movie itself, I think, was fine because it's just like a drama, but then the twist ending is oh, by the way, he's gonna die in the what insane behavior. That person should never write again.

SPEAKER_03 1:05:47

I remember I heard about that movie and I heard about that twist, and I was like, Yep, not watching that.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:52

Don't watch it because it doesn't, it comes out of nowhere. It has nothing to do with the movie, other than that's you know, that's it. They just were like, and anyone could have been in that. Towers. Look at this. Ridiculous.

SPEAKER_03 1:06:03

Uh they get it. Sorry. They get across. Nathan almost falls. Uh they find another crater, but that one's barren. And then they're going to the crater, and then they okay. This was like my favorite part. Here they are. They fence one crater, and then they run across this random guy that points a gun at them. And they're all like, hey, we're going to the good crater. And then he's like, Oh, you should probably come to my house and we'll be friends, and I'll trust my daughter with you because I'm in the I'm forever. Because I'm in the middle of nowhere for no reason.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:40

Correct.

SPEAKER_03 1:06:41

Was he was he delivering mail?

SPEAKER_01 1:06:44

No, no, he's not at he just moved into the mail center. He's not delivering mail. Um, he just he apparently can't go anywhere because his wife can't travel, you know.

SPEAKER_03 1:06:54

What what's he doing out here, Tony? In the middle of nowhere?

SPEAKER_01 1:06:57

Well, his wife can't travel, you see.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:00

He's so that's like this is his thing? He likes to go camping?

SPEAKER_01 1:07:03

Yeah. He loves he loves camping. And uh, you know, once you get out there, you can't go back.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:09

So it's his wife's a mute in a wheelchair, so he's all like, honey, I'm I'm leaving. If you don't want me to go, tell me. Can't hear you. No, okay, I'll see you later.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:21

That's dark, Dan. Good for you.

Mail Center Haven And New Companion

SPEAKER_03 1:07:23

So he drives them back to his Paz de Calais. He lives in a male sorting center, and I it he has he has solar power there, he has a super hot daughter, wife can't speak because of radiation.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:37

All true.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:38

I believe Jared Butler's character says, This is all yours.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:43

Yep, that's what he says.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:44

Like he's got a mail sorting center. I mean, if 75% of the population got it.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:50

He's got electricity and he's done it all himself. But he made it sound like this is all you you've got this whole mail sorting center.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:58

Everything the light touches. Everyone wants. I mean, doesn't everyone want to steal your mail sorting center from you?

SPEAKER_01 1:08:06

That's the dream, you know? Oh lovely. It's a lovely moment for everybody. Um uh the sons and then there's Gerard's like, hasn't people tried to take it from you? And the French guy's like, well, they tried. What? How? You're one guy, you're just one dude. You're gonna tell me that someone came and you fought them all off? I don't think so.

SPEAKER_03 1:08:30

The wife probably has a machine gun wheelchair. Yeah, probably cool. Uh Nathan shows the girl his star charts, and they're like, she's all like, I'm in love with you now.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:44

Hell yeah. Good for you, Nate.

SPEAKER_03 1:08:47

Uh in the in the morning, the dude like shows him a map of where they need to go. He also knows the commander, and he also is command the commander of the the Western forces is his buddy, and he gives him a photo and says, if you show him this photo, he'll do anything for you. Anything for you. And then he's like, That's weird. You gotta take my daughter, and then he says, Because you're the first person that I've met that I can trust. Now, how long has he known this guy? Less than 24 hours. Eight hours.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:20

Right? I mean that's wild. He doesn't really care about his daughter that much.

SPEAKER_03 1:09:25

I don't know. I'm sorry. Talk about the level of of emotion as the daughter leaves.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:33

Oh, I'd say on a scale of zero to ten, it's a 1.5. There it is. 1.5 in the. The mom is very sad. But she can't talk. The mom is crying. She can't talk, but she's got tears. Oh, okay, good. The daughter is thinking, I'm so glad I don't have to deal with this anymore. So she's getting the F out of there. And then the dad's just like, okay, bye-bye, sweetie. And that's it.

SPEAKER_03 1:09:57

So they drive a little while, and then what do they what do they do with after they drive a little while? Picnic? They think they need a picnic time. And what do they what do they talk about on their picnic?

SPEAKER_01 1:10:08

They're doing the uh one of their car games that they're talking about. After the last time they played a car game, someone was murdered in front of them. They were they were thinking, let's do another one, see what happens. Um, they're playing, what is it, uh Would You Rather? Yeah, and what is a fun game.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:24

And what are the would you rathers that they do, Tony?

SPEAKER_01 1:10:27

Uh one of them is of would you rather fight a chicken-sized horse or 50 horse-sized chickens? Is that what it is? I think that's one of them. Something, I don't know. I don't or a horse, I don't know. Something weird. Uh they were all weird. I don't know. Would you rather have a big feet or small hands, which doesn't even that's not even a good one. I don't care.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:54

And would you rather have invisibility or be able to read people's minds? Ah, neither.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:59

I pick neither of those. I want to be able to either fly or uh Wolverine's regeneration. Those are the only two superpowers worth having. No, there's only one superpower worth having. I just told you the two, but what's yours, Dan? Teleportation. Teleportation would be cool. I don't I don't totally understand how it works. Do I have to know the place to teleport to it? Because then it's like, I'm not really going anywhere new. That's not that exciting. Haven't you ever seen Jumper? Uh is that Christian Hayden Christensen? Or is that Looper? Which one am I thinking of?

SPEAKER_03 1:11:34

Looper's the one Looper's the one with uh uh Bruce Willis and uh uh uh that little mousey dude who rode a bike. He played a bike messenger in that one movie.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:47

Oh, yeah, yeah. I can't think of his name.

SPEAKER_03 1:11:50

Oh, Gordon Levitt Jr.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:53

Yeah, Joseph Gordon Levitt. Yeah, he's from Third Rock from the Sun.

SPEAKER_03 1:11:55

He was not on Third Rock from the Sun.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:56

That was Yes, he is! Are you crazy? He plays the young guy on that show. I didn't play. He's the young boy. Yeah. Oh, wow. JGL. Good stuff. He's had a long career. Good for him. No, Jumper's He was almost Robin. So that's cool.

SPEAKER_03 1:12:11

Jumpers the Chris Evans movie.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:14

Okay. I don't remember. That's a good movie. That's a good movie. Do they have so that they didn't answer my question because I don't remember the movie. Did they have to know?

SPEAKER_03 1:12:24

No, there's actually two of them, aren't there? There's there's the one where they all have soup different superpowers, and then there's the one where everyone just push. There's push and then there's jumper.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:35

Push and a jumper. Okay. I remember I feel like I remember push. I don't know. Push is really good.

SPEAKER_03 1:12:39

Push is the good one.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:40

Jumper's okay.

unknown 1:12:41

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:41

Push is great. Push is the one with Chris Evans, right? Chris Evans is push, yeah. Yeah, okay. I think yeah, I remember that movie. But does he teleport in push? I thought he just got this power. I don't remember. We should watch it again. Maybe he's a jumper too.

Trenches, Bus Ambush, And Sacrifice

SPEAKER_03 1:12:56

He might be a jumper too. Maybe he's in everything. He's good. He's a right. I like him. He he never says no, that bro. Okay. No, good for him. Boom. Military guys show up. They're like, this is a war zone. And they're all like, you know what we'll do.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:11

But it's kind of not, right? Because they're the only people we've seen. I don't know, man. They're like, this is a war zone. I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:18

They're like, we gotta go see this commander, and they're like, we'll take you.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:22

Right. No, you guys got things to do. If if you're at war, you got stuff to do. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:27

They take them. He's all like they go through the pass and then boom, so he's like, move as I move, stay low, stop, down. Ooh, let's go. Go.

SPEAKER_02 1:13:36

Don't go.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:36

Why are they going through the trenches and just people are getting shot all the time? So many people die in this trench in 20 minutes. That if this is how if this is the average day in that trench, uh, there's probably 500 people dying a day. And this has been going on for five years? Just doesn't make any sense, Dan. In the good, the bad, and the ugly. Okay. Have you ever seen the good, the bad, and the ugly? I don't know if uh I haven't seen a ton of Eastwood, if I'm just being honest.

SPEAKER_03 1:14:07

So they're looking for gold, and it's in this cemetery. They get to the they get to the front lines of the Civil War. The real Civil War. They're on one side, and the other, you know, the where they're going is on the yeah, they need to go to the other side. Of course. And so they what they have to do is they have to go down and blow up the bridge that they're fighting over, right? Oh. And the whole idea is the commander can't send his guys down there to blow it up because that would be a dereliction of duty, but they can have these idiots go do it. So they go and they they they go down there, they blow up the bridge, and then they, you know, they go back and then they fall asleep and they wake up the next morning, the entire war is gone from this location. Oh my god. And it's super cool because you're all like, that's you know, that's the war goes where it needs to be warring. And as soon as the war moves, you know, everyone's like, oh, the bridge is gone. Okay, go do this. And then they're all like, Well, we did the thing. You know, this one they're just like uh the front lines, we we just help you get across them. Yeah, what they get to the camp where the thing is, turns out the Commodore is dead, and so the other guy's like, get out of the tent. I don't need you here. You know, they're like, but we need the bus to get into the crater, and he's like, No, no, no. And then he's like, Gerard Butler, talk about how Gerard Butler convinces them. What what what immense bargaining power he has to let them very quietly lets him know that he's dying.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:40

No, he doesn't. Did he say that? He says that. He literally says, I'm dying, and I promised my family I'd get them to the crater. Yeah. What do you say now? And he's like, Okay, if you promised him, if you hadn't promised, I would say no. But if you promised, uh I can't break the promise, so I guess you can go on the bus, which by the way, had plenty of room to begin with. So it's fine. So weird little bus shows weird stuff.

SPEAKER_03 1:16:10

Here goes the bus, boop, b-b-bup bus. They get stopped by three armed guys. Armed guys are like, everybody off the bus after shooting the driver and maybe one other person. And then Gerard Butler takes one for the team, gets shot, and kills all the bad guys.

SPEAKER_01 1:16:26

And he dies. Well, he's dying. They walk. They walk. Or Morena drives the bus. She's like, I'll drive, and then they can't go up a hill. So then they're like, let's walk. And then they all walk together and they get over the hill and they see uh paradise. Sorry, yeah, paradise. And then he dies. And then he dies, yeah. That's correct. Um think of the life you can build here. Couldn't they have just walked it? Couldn't they have just walked this? It seems like it did seem like it was that far. Yeah, for sure. You know, then you'd get then you'd get shot by guys without a bus. So that's worse, pretty sure.

SPEAKER_03 1:17:11

And then we have a coda where he like talks about life. I remember life and living. Is he the one talking?

SPEAKER_01 1:17:18

He's dead. I don't like this. I don't like when you give this, because this is now breaking the fourth wall, right? This character's dead. Who's he talking to? He's saying this about his is he in heaven? Is that what's happening right now? I don't like it. Have him leave a note for the sun or something, and then the note can be your coda. That's fine. It's you know, it's a way to get around.

SPEAKER_03 1:17:43

Oh, yeah, you could have given him a note, and then notes like Sun, make babies with this hot French girl, become an astronomer, live your dreams. I approve. I'm gone, but you know, I'll be in the ground.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:57

Live on the world will live on, repopulate, repopulate, repopulate. Um, but instead, it's Charard Butler giving a weird speech after his character's dead about how the world's going on. I it's it's I just don't like it.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:10

Put acorns in my chest cavity and then bury me, and trees will split make sure it's an apple truce that you can eat.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:20

You can eat the seeds of me. Um every time you eat it, you're gonna be eating a piece of me. Um it's beautiful. It's great.

unknown 1:18:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:27

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:28

Yeah, he didn't do that.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:29

Um I don't know how we talked about it.

Better Storytelling In Brawl In Cellblock 99

SPEAKER_01 1:18:31

I told you there was a lot to talk about, Dan. I this this movie does a lot of things wrong. Not in a way that I'm so mad that it's the worst movie I've ever seen, just in a way that I just really wanted this to be a better movie than it is. And you could have done it with just a little bit of effort. This could have been a pretty fun movie, I think. Yeah. Um, but it wasn't. They didn't do it. No. They want to but if you like the first one, you know, you know, give it a shot. Don't want to cash in on all that Greenland money. That couldn't, that can't be it. Because this was it's six years ago. Like nobody cares. I don't know. This is weird. Okay, now we talk about something we liked.

SPEAKER_03 1:19:14

I watched these yes sir. I watched this movie called Brawl in Cellblock 99. Never heard of it. From the director that also did Bone Tomahawk, which I tried to watch and I did not care for. He also did this movie called Dragged Across Concrete with Concrete, yeah. With uh Mel Gibson and Mel Gibson, yeah, I remember that one.

SPEAKER_01 1:19:34

And Vince Vaughn. You saw that one? Vince Vaughn. Yeah, you saw that one. I didn't see it, I just remember the trailer. That's it. So I'm not allowed to watch Mel Gibson movies, so he's super it is what it is. Because he's a super crazy Christian? He's a bad guy. He's a bad guy, and I'm not allowed to support it. Well, he plays a bad guy in that movie.

SPEAKER_03 1:19:54

But Brawl and Sellblock 99, uh, basically Vince Vaughn plays, I guess, an Xboxer, and things things go wrong.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:07

And there's a surprise.

SPEAKER_03 1:20:09

It's like this movie will sit in a situation. It will be like, I'm not gonna tell you what's gonna hap you know, the movie's like, I'm not gonna tell you what's gonna happen because terrible things could happen or who knows what. And and after what I guess Mercy was a movie that never sat in anything that it did. This neither does this movie. This will be never two in a row. You know, it's like you gotta give us some scenes, and and there are just some brutal scenes in this movie, and there's there's you know, there's a scene with with his him and his wife when things are not going well in their relationship, and you're like, I I have no idea where this scene is going to end. I do not know what's going to happen. And and that is refreshing. You know, like this movie, sure. You're like, oh, they're gonna go there, there may be some conflict, and then they're gonna be in just heading in a new direction, you know, when when we're done with this situation. And yeah, I guess none of it matters. I don't I don't care. Oh, uh, what's his name? Uh Miami Vice. Who's the Miami Vice guy? Don Johnson. Don Johnson's in both of these movies, too. I love Don Johnson. Don Johnson's great. Don Johnson is super great now. He he he's in stuff that you're like, oh, this I want to see him in this. You know, he's he's in the Watchman TV series where he was incredible. Right, yeah, yeah. And both of these movies, super fun, super play the character. You know, he's like, ah bring me in, I'll play a character, I'll I'll play the shittiest person on the planet if you want. Yeah, he'll play whatever you know. That's the thing. He does not care. He's like, I'll play whatever you want. And that's the thing about that's the thing about this this director guy is he has his people that he uses. And he's like, Oh, sure, I like these people, I'm gonna put them in different, completely different roles. If you trust them, yeah. And and they're going to get the there's the I think it's the woman from the Dexter series is in both of these movies. I think she plays the wife in the first one.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:06

Dexter sister, I can't remember her name.

SPEAKER_03 1:22:08

Yeah. Um, okay. And then the second one, she plays this small role, and it is a role that I will think about the rest of my life. Because it was super it, and it was like not integral to the plot. It was just like this sort of little bit bit that they shoehorned in there, and you're just like, wow, I will think about that character the rest of my life, and and what it says about storytelling is that you don't need, you know, it it doesn't have to be important, but if you have something you want to say, put that in your movie, and and that's why you watch Greenland 2 and you're just like there no one had anything to say ever.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:44

They sure didn't. Sure didn't.

SPEAKER_03 1:22:47

And they didn't have anything visual to say. That's the other thing about like this and mercy. These movies have nothing visual to say.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:22:55

And when you're going to make the thumbnails to put them up on YouTube, you go through the photos and you're just like, there's just there's nothing here. It's not the fucking one. There's just, you know, it's like, what was this?

SPEAKER_01 1:23:08

Oh, that's that's brutal.

SPEAKER_03 1:23:09

The Kate McGinnon one with the you're just like, think about the think about the cavemen in 2001, and you're just like, eh, well, there you go, the cavemen in 2001, and you're having them. I don't know what's happening. Tony!

Send Help Review And Sam Raimi Vibes

SPEAKER_01 1:23:25

Yes, I'll tell you something about something like that. This is long overdue. Uh wanted to see it when it was in theaters last year, but we finally got to see Send Help uh with Dylan O'Brien and Mean Girls. Why can't I think of Mean Girls' name? Oh, I feel so bad. My wife would kill me. Uh Amy Paul. Hold on. No, no, no. The main the main girl. She's in the notebook. Why can't I think of her name? Sydney Sweeney. No, not Sydney Sweeney. That's terrible. Rachel McAdams. I had to Google that, you guys. That's how that's how bad my brain is. Rachel McAdams.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:02

Is Rachel McAdams the one in in Eurovision? Yes.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:07

Oh, she's so funny. I guess I should have said that because then you would have known it right away. She's so funny. Anyhow. She's so funny. She's great. And her and so it's like her and Dylan O'Brien trapped on a deserted island. Dylan O'Brien. One of my favorite actors of the moment. Uh, he was in the Maze Runner series, which isn't why I like it, but he's a good one.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:27

Is he the big kid in Maze Runner? Because I saw all those.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:30

Yes. And then he did Love and Monsters. Remember that movie? Which is phenomenal. He's the guy in Love and Monsters. Yeah. So he's I love him. He's done a lot of great stuff. Anyhow, this is like two powerhouses of acting just going at it for 90 minutes on a deserted island. It's a tree. It's crazy. It's Sam Raimi directing. So it is it is weird. It's kooky. It's creepy. It's good. I had a great time. It's not something I'll ever watch again, I don't think. Because it's it's a lot. Black comedy, right? Yeah, yeah. Black comedy. It's a lot to handle, but it was it was a ride. So I would recommend it one time.

SPEAKER_03 1:25:08

I'll give it a shot. Um, give it a shot. Have fun. Because I sometimes I can't handle black comedies, but sometimes I enjoy them. Well, it's it's pretty dark. Because I read I read something about it, and I was like, oh, this this is gonna be a thing. I don't I don't know if I could take it.

SPEAKER_01 1:25:22

It's a lot. I'm not gonna lie, it's a lot. It's a lot, but it was it was fun. I had a good time.

Netflix Series Complaints And Script Voice

SPEAKER_03 1:25:27

We also watched that it's like a new eight-part series on on Netflix. Something terrible is going to happen. Oh, the new the Stranger Things guys, right?

SPEAKER_01 1:25:38

Yeah. Yeah, the Duffer brothers.

SPEAKER_03 1:25:39

Uh, they need they need to be stopped. It's it's it's I mean, we we we sat through the whole thing. Shannon kind of liked it, I think.

SPEAKER_01 1:25:48

I I was just like I'm not even sure I'm gonna give it a shot, to be honest.

SPEAKER_03 1:25:52

I just sat there criticizing it the whole time. I'm like, what? Yeah, she's a what? We we're we're finding out what you know, like you know, like when you find out some what somebody who somebody is, you know, the main character there you find out what it is that she's going to college for, you're like, wait, what? That's who this character is? Uh no, no clue of any of this before this scene. Okay, we're going in that direction.

SPEAKER_01 1:26:16

Interesting. You know, and you get to the end and you're like, now I want to watch it. Now you're convincing me to watch it, and I love it.

SPEAKER_03 1:26:23

You gotta start it, and then uh you can read the synopsis and then uh just skip to the last episode.

SPEAKER_01 1:26:30

Yeah, it'll be great.

SPEAKER_03 1:26:31

You know, it's like sure, it's like a thing that's like it implicates that there's gonna be surprises, and then you're like, Yeah, oh there's not really sometimes the dot character dialogue is so bad, and then the third episode you're like, wow, all these characters that weren't sounding like human beings are now sounding like human beings. So that's the worrisome thing.

SPEAKER_01 1:26:57

It's like interesting.

SPEAKER_03 1:26:59

What you want in a when you run a show, you're supposed to have a voice because they ran the show. I mean, it was a different person, you know, that it was their show, but they were the executive producers, but you have to have somebody that goes in there and kicks the scripts in the teeth until so that it doesn't seem like it's you know three or four different shows. And this one totally felt like different shows constantly. That's bad. Yeah, that's bad. Very bad. Yeah. Yeah, because it's about this woman and they're they're getting married, and they go to the parents' cabin, and the cabin is palatial, and at no time do they explain why these people are infinitely wealthy. And you're like, you gotta you gotta give us a couple of lines. You got eight episodes. He should be explaining. You got a long time.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:52

You got a long time to let us know.

SPEAKER_03 1:27:54

You know, there's like a family portrait, you know, in the thing, and then they paint her into the portrait at a certain point. And you're like, when you have painters on staff, this is just call up Ralph, get him to retouch it. Yes, this is not this is not your standard family that has painters on on call.

SPEAKER_01 1:28:13

No. Yeah. Yeah. You know, it's like really weird. Uh yeah. Now yeah, I definitely now I feel like I have to watch it. So thank you for that, Dan.

Jury Duty Praise And James Marsden

SPEAKER_03 1:28:22

We gotta finish jury duty too. Or uh Company Retreat.

SPEAKER_01 1:28:26

I got yeah, I've finished Company Retreat. I I have to start jury duty, still haven't watched it. And I have to watch Jury Duty because James Marsden is now hosting the reunion of Company Retreat. So I want to I want to make sure I have jury duty.

SPEAKER_03 1:28:40

I told you about this on the show. I know. And James Marsden in Jury Duty is amazing, right? He is beyond a treat. You were just like every line he says, you're just like, oh, it's so good. So I love him so much. He's so funny. And I think he plays a dick, if I remember correctly. Yeah, that's well, he's playing a version of himself, right? So he plays a self, yeah. He is he is the actor James Martin, but he plays a self-absorbed dick version of himself, and you're just like, oh, I love this, you know, because that that understanding what the trope is and then embodying it, but not embodying it, you know, in just enough of a heightened way. You're just like, okay, 10 10 out of 10, he was incredible.

SPEAKER_01 1:29:24

We're gonna have to read that one. I think he's great.

Next Week Avatar And Final Thoughts

SPEAKER_03 1:29:26

Yeah, and yeah. Good, good, good places for improvisers to go and uh do their thing. Which is beautiful. Okay, Tony. Uh, so you have the choice. We could you if you want to call the Audible and we do whatchamacallit, we could do what you m call it.

SPEAKER_01 1:29:43

If you let's just do let's just do avatar, Dan. Let's do avatar, and then we'll get back to regular scheduled programming. We gotta get out of the way, you know? I I I don't care either way.

SPEAKER_03 1:29:54

I I don't want to watch it. I know you don't. That's why we have to. See, this is why you you want to do it because of the sexy one that's in there. You knew that there's the sexy one.

SPEAKER_01 1:30:04

Is there sexy one?

SPEAKER_03 1:30:04

I think is she in the trailer?

SPEAKER_01 1:30:06

There's a super sexy one that people are all like, oh yeah. She's like mean sexy. Yeah, oh, that's my favorite kind. Oh, Dan. I think I'm gonna like this one. This is gonna be the first avatar that I enjoy. What a treat. My only question is did we do the first avatar or did we just skip right to the second? I can't remember. I know we did the second. Oh, yeah. I feel like we've done I think we've done them both. I don't know. I think we did one and two. I'm pretty sure. We might have done two first and then gone back and did the first one after we did the second one.

SPEAKER_03 1:30:38

I don't think I don't think we did the first because I don't I don't feel like I've ever re-watched it.

SPEAKER_01 1:30:44

Now's the perfect time. You you got nine hours to kill this week, right? You can watch all three of them. You're gonna rewatch two? God, no, I refuse to re-watch the second one.

SPEAKER_03 1:30:55

Refuse. I mean, yeah, sucking the brains out of whales. That was just weird. That's just, I mean, you know, I'm all I'm all for environmentalism, but you know, don't make it terrible, you know.

SPEAKER_01 1:31:08

Yeah. I'm excited. Yeah, all right. Let's do so. What is this one called? Do you remember? Hot Fire? Fire and Ash. Fire and Ash. Avatar. Oh, that's hey, that's there's your title. Yeah. There's your thumbnail title.

Thumbs Up, Subscribe, And Goodbye

SPEAKER_03 1:31:25

Fire and ass. Okay, Tony. Uh beautiful. Hey everybody, if you like what you see, give us a thumbs up. Um subscribe, leave a comment. One collectible guy deal with uh Steven, he just said, Oh yeah, I love your guy's show. I've been watching it. I'm like, wow. Oh, shout out, Stephen.

SPEAKER_01 1:31:45

Steven probably didn't make it this deep in the show, but shout out to you, sir. We appreciate you. He's like what a sweet guy.

SPEAKER_03 1:31:50

I I watched some of it. You know, enough's enough. Yeah, that's fine. 15, 20 minutes, and then I then I tap out.

SPEAKER_01 1:31:56

But that's actually pretty good. You know, I'll I respect it.

SPEAKER_03 1:31:59

But you know, yeah, so it's you know, we're we're slowly, you know, we got Todd out there, we got our our buddy in Australia, we got Steven. We're we're slowly like that. We're getting a handful of fans here, people. This is this is exciting stuff. But thank you all for anybody that that's survives uh us, you know. We appreciate it. We appreciate you.

SPEAKER_01 1:32:21

Respect, nothing but respect. Reach out, reach out. We're just we're we're lonely. Come hang out with us. Or don't. Or don't because we don't we don't need you.

SPEAKER_03 1:32:30

Oh, sorry. Spoke the quiet part out loud. We do need you, we do need you.

SPEAKER_01 1:32:35

We do, we need it. We need it, we need the love, and uh maybe we'll see you next week. Goodbye, everybody.