Hate Watching Honey Don’t: Pretty Sure Honey Didn't

A Vespa hums into Bakersfield, a church robe hides bondage gear, and a smooth-talking reverend runs a drug ring between sermons about macaroni. We dive into Honey Don’t with a simple litmus test for any detective story: does the protagonist actually want something concrete? When a PI drifts through clues without being hired, breaking in, or deducing much of anything, style and shock have to work overtime. Sometimes they do—there’s a killer dark-comic exchange where the reverend clarifies which “loose end” needs cutting, and a punchy beatdown where Honey demolishes her niece’s abuser and half the set with a stubborn attempt to break a gun. Those moments pop because desire finally drives action.

Most of the time, though, the movie trades plot for “period interest.” Public intimacy scenes and graphic interludes arrive without chemistry or consequence, the police flirtation thread wanders, and tonal flourishes—freeze-frame credits, a lounge pianist narrator, and a congregation chanting “macaroni”—feel like disconnected curios. We contrast that with great shaggy noirs that still hum on character wants. The Big Lebowski may meander, but everyone wants something, and that magnet pulls you through. Here, the late twist that recasts MG as the true monster doesn’t reframe earlier clues so much as overwrite them, draining suspense and turning the finale into a list of facts instead of a reckoning.

We talk craft throughout: how color and quirky detail should feed a throughline; how stakes escalate when choices collide; why romance needs buildup to matter; and how consequence grounds even the wildest genre swings. Bakersfield looks great. Chris Evans chews scenery like a pro. But without a spine of desire and payoff, Honey Don’t plays like a collage—provocative, occasionally funny, and oddly hollow once the noise fades.

If you’re into smart, spirited takedowns of messy movies, queue this one up, then tell us your spiciest take. Subscribe, drop a review, and let us know: did any of it work for you, or are we right to call it a case with no core?

Written lovingly by AI

Be our friend!

Dan: @shakybacon
Tony: @tonydczech

And follow the podcast on IG: @hatewatchingDAT

Transcript

Cold Open: Speedrun Banter

SPEAKER_00 0:20

Welcome to Heat Watching with Dan and Tony. I am Dan. I am Tony. I think we're gonna speedrun this one.

SPEAKER_01 0:27

I love it. I love a speedrun like Mario. That's what people do on the YouTubes. They do speedruns of old video games. You know, here's the thing that bothers me. It makes me feel inferior because I can't even beat the games going at a regular pace. But then there are people that are beating them in like two hours. It's like, how are you doing this? Well, they go through a lot of warps. A lot of cheating. That must be the answer. I feel like I use the warps. I only know the only one I know of is on the first dungeon sewer level, where you jump up on the bricks and then you can go to like one warp. That's the only one I've ever found.

SPEAKER_00 1:07

Um on this show, we watch a movie, then we talk about the movie, and it's just more sound effects.

SPEAKER_02 1:18

Oh, swimming. Swimming, swimming. I know that one.

SPEAKER_00 1:21

Cloud noise.

SPEAKER_02 1:24

That doesn't sound like a cloud that I've ever heard before. I don't know, guys.

SPEAKER_00 1:27

It's gotta work on that. Um, we watch a movie, we talk about the movie. Usually the movie is terrible. In a couple of cases, uh somebody, somebody put me on blast because in their aliens aliens versus predator episode. Okay, I said that Alien came out and then Aliens 2 came out and it was had Danny Glover in it.

SPEAKER_01 1:49

No, Predator 2 has Danny Glover in it. I not catch, I didn't even catch that on the episode, did I? Oh no, but I know the answer. Now I look just as dumb as you do.

SPEAKER_00 2:00

And then I said Aliens 3 came out, and that was directed by David Fincher.

SPEAKER_02 2:04

I don't know. I don't know which one Fincher did.

SPEAKER_00 2:07

That's the one where they got the shaved heads and they're all in the prison or something. I've never seen it.

SPEAKER_02 2:11

Great, great. No one ever saw it.

Setting The Show’s Premise

SPEAKER_01 2:13

Nobody needed it. So someone was like, no, you've got this all wrong, dude.

SPEAKER_00 2:17

I did it like twice, dude. We both were like, no-do.

unknown 2:22

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 2:23

Tony, talk to talk to talk to everyone about what movie we're we watched this week.

SPEAKER_01 2:30

Dear everyone. Um we so we're we we watched the first in a trilogy. Well, not really a trilogy, but like sort of a trilogy. Fingers crossed. Um same actor, at least in the two of them. Uh Ethan Cohen. And uh is Trisha his wife? Is it his wife? Uh-oh. History lesson.

SPEAKER_00 2:52

They're married.

SPEAKER_02 2:54

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 2:54

She's a lesbian.

SPEAKER_02 2:57

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 2:58

And they both have outside of their marriage partners.

SPEAKER_01 3:05

Why? So then listen, not here to judge. You can do whatever you want to do. I don't just don't marry each other then. What is I don't maybe tax benefits? Maybe that's the maybe that's the reason. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 3:17

The only thing I would question is why are you calling yourself a lesbian if you're polyamorous or something? You know, I mean, uh I there's lots of people that talk about this stuff, and it's just it lesbian just sort of has a connotation to me of only being interested in female partners. That's that's my basic understanding.

The Ethan Coen Project And Cast

SPEAKER_01 3:37

Yeah, we we obviously can't go deep into this conversation, too, too idiot voice. We don't know anything. But I I would agree with you, like that's where my head goes, but maybe I don't know anything. Yeah, we got I'm fine with that.

SPEAKER_00 3:49

We got lots of terms for flexibility, and I I would if it was me, I would just say something a little more flexible.

SPEAKER_01 3:55

Sure, sure. Whatever. So, anyhow, anyhow, Ethan and Trisha were like, let's make some movies. So we watched the first one Drive Away Dolls. Yeah, terrible movie, hated it, thought it was awful. So then they made a second one, and I was like, Well, we gotta do all of them. We're gonna have to do all three. So this is uh Honey Don't 20, 25 hour, 20 minutes.

SPEAKER_00 4:19

Was she a detective in that first movie?

SPEAKER_01 4:22

No, it's definitely not the same character, it's just the same actor, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 4:27

Margaret Qually.

SPEAKER_01 4:28

Yeah, I you know, I just don't know, Dan. I don't know about her.

SPEAKER_00 4:35

There are points at which the accent was almost working. Sure. Then you go to other points, and then it would just be like, oh, it's gone now. I don't know if they shut this later or earlier, but it's not working.

SPEAKER_02 4:49

Hard to be sure.

SPEAKER_01 4:50

Right.

SPEAKER_00 4:50

But it's it's working better than the first one.

SPEAKER_01 4:54

That's true. I mean, well, you know, I've with you spend six months shooting the first one, then six months here, like, you know, it better be getting better. Good golly, almighty. Um, yeah, I just don't I just don't know though. She doesn't maybe she's not cool enough for me. Maybe that's what it is in this one, because she's, you know, the private eye. You gotta be kinda cool. Um I don't I don't know. Maybe you don't. Maybe I'm maybe that's me putting something on a character that never wanted to be that. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 5:25

I think in the first movie we liked what's her name, uh the girlfriend uh who's funny. Uh whatever her name is. Um and I don't think I liked anything else about that movie. I don't who was the second who was the second banana in that movie? Because it was two of them in the car.

SPEAKER_01 5:44

Wasn't there two people in the car? Yeah, there was. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 5:48

Margaret Qually and someone else. Uh in this movie, I liked one scene. One scene.

SPEAKER_01 5:55

That's it. Oh, interesting. I do have a favorite scene. There it is, but I feel like I liked a couple of scenes, but they all had one thing in common in my scenes.

SPEAKER_00 6:03

Okay, good. Um so basically, this movie, she's a private detective. She's kind of. I don't know why. Doing an investigation of something just because someone maybe wanted to have hired her, and then she because they're dead.

SPEAKER_01 6:20

So I'm confused.

SPEAKER_00 6:22

She doesn't solve it. It just sort of becomes solved at the end.

SPEAKER_01 6:26

But it doesn't really become solved because the French are gonna keep doing something. What they were doing, I don't totally know.

SPEAKER_00 6:33

They're drinking.

First Impressions: Accent And Tone

SPEAKER_01 6:35

But also, like No, I yeah, sure, but why are they using the church? And then who are they gonna go to now? I really don't know. But my whole thing is like, what is the plot of the movie?

SPEAKER_00 6:46

Uh there is there there's a story, but I don't think that there's a plot. And I don't and I I this was what I was thinking about. I got to got to the end of this movie, and you're like, okay, things happened. But the reason why you we never got engaged in this movie is because no character wants anything.

SPEAKER_01 7:08

Oh, not true. Charlie Day wants Margaret Qually's phone number. So there you go.

SPEAKER_00 7:16

Think about putting Charlie Day in this movie, and the only thing you have him do is hit on her. Which he does. He's fine at it. He's fine at it. Yeah, he's fine. He tries, and you're like, Well, I maybe it'll eventually work. I I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 7:32

Nope. Not gonna spoiler, not gonna work. Yeah. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 7:38

Like he's funny.

SPEAKER_01 7:41

Yeah, well, he is, usually. Um and again, not his fault. Like, he's given absolutely nothing to do. They're just like, hey, do a funny accent and uh hit on her. There you go, there's your character. Come and film three days. Um, but yeah, no, like there is no central quest, the desire. Like, then there's nothing, there's nothing to hold on to and follow throughout the movie. They're just kind of going through this little story of like some bad people doing some bad things, and then they and then they're not anymore because most of them die. And then you're like, okay, well, that was fun.

SPEAKER_00 8:20

Now, do you like the uh the Jeff Bridges drinking the white Russians uh movie?

SPEAKER_01 8:25

You probably hate that movie. No, I hate the Big Lebowski. And my brother and I argue about it every time. He it's one of his favorite movies of all time. He's got the poster on as well, and every time I go there, I'm like, this is the dumbest thing you've ever done. Yeah. Huge mistake. Uh no, I don't I don't enjoy that movie. For similar reasons.

SPEAKER_00 8:43

It's it's a very similar movie, right? It's it's a sort of random sort of quest that that characters sort of fall through, but you have these big crazy characters that do big crazy things.

SPEAKER_01 8:57

And you have actors can just like giving it their all for these characters. You know, like Goodman, come on. That guy's going 10 out of 10 in that movie.

SPEAKER_00 9:08

There's there's nothing negative you can say about any of the acting or characterization in the Big Lebowski.

SPEAKER_02 9:16

Nope. Absolutely.

What’s The Plot, Exactly?

SPEAKER_00 9:17

It's one of the greatest movies for acting and characterization there has ever been. But there's once again, the plot is just this sort of rant, it's just sort of rant happenstance.

unknown 9:27

Yep.

SPEAKER_01 9:27

And that's you know, if that's your thing, that's fine. Uh, it's not my thing. I'll tell you that right now. Don't enjoy it because I have no reason to watch that movie. And I watch it, I'm like, why am I watching this movie? Yeah, these people are funny, they're doing funny things. I don't I could watch that in a real movie where things actually happen and I care and I give a shit. You know? Um this movie, all I've got is Chris Evans. That's not very good.

SPEAKER_00 9:50

I'm gonna make it, I'm gonna posit something.

SPEAKER_02 9:54

I'm listening.

SPEAKER_00 9:56

This movie was made so that for the period interest of the people making the movie.

SPEAKER_02 10:06

Yeah, yeah, sure. Sure. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 10:09

That's it. That's the only the only reason this movie exists is so that we can watch Margaret Quali and Aubrey Plaza simulate sex, we can watch Chris Evans and random church people sex. Uh does Margaret Qually have sex with someone else? Or what's his name? Hot French lady have sex with Chris Evans again. It it feels like strangely exploitative that someone has kind of come up with some scenarios in their mind and they're using a Hollywood-ish movie to have these characters sort of do this dance.

SPEAKER_01 10:48

Yeah. It's like, well, alright, and now in this scene you have sex with this other person. It's like, what uh why? Just do it. Just do it. Don't don't ask questions, just do it.

SPEAKER_00 10:57

When the French lady's in the in the river naked, you're like, what the fuck? And then when the And that's two minutes into the movie, and you're like, why is why? What is the point of that? And then when the French lady has sex with Chris Evans, you're like, why why is she having sex with him? Why why is I don't understand that.

SPEAKER_01 11:14

No reason whatsoever. She would just kill him. She'd just kill him.

SPEAKER_00 11:18

This movie also sort of posits that sex is all that anybody thinks about or cares about, or yeah.

SPEAKER_01 11:27

Yeah. I would agree with that. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 11:32

Maybe that's the way the world is. I I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 11:34

Maybe that's well, the one guy cared about his grandma. So there you go. Wrong again, Dan. The one guy didn't care.

SPEAKER_00 11:41

Oh, there was there was another funny thing. Okay, there's a couple funny things. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 11:45

Um was there? Oh. Something with the grandma was funny?

SPEAKER_00 11:49

Yeah. Okay. You want to start? Shall we? Shall we start, Tony? Shall we start talking about the hard?

SPEAKER_01 11:53

I just can't wait to get to I love hearing all the things you think are funny. Spoilers ahead. Big time spoilers. All the spoilers.

SPEAKER_02 12:01

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 12:02

Um, we start with the lady in the leopard pants, who's the French lady whose name is Cher. Cher Cherry. No, not Cherry, not Cherry. Cher. Sherry? No. Not Sherry. Hold on, Cherry. Cher. Yep. Cher.

SPEAKER_01 12:17

Like the singer.

Lebowski Comparisons And Aimless Plots

SPEAKER_00 12:18

She is in the desert. She reaches a crash car. She goes to the crash car. The person in the crash car, who I thought was a man. She takes a ring off of their finger. Yeah. Doesn't offer them any kind of aid. And then goes and swims naked in a river.

SPEAKER_01 12:38

And then puts her clothes, the same clothes back on, dripping wet. Who would ever that's that is crazy behavior, Dan. You would never strip, just swim in your clothes, then, right? If you're just gonna get them all wet anyhow, just swim in your clothes. She took the time to take her clothes off and then gets right out and puts them on, which is still all wet. Nobody does that.

SPEAKER_00 13:01

Could you imagine wet underwear under your wet clothes?

SPEAKER_01 13:05

I can imagine it. It's terrible. That sounds like my nightmare. That sounds horrible. Awful stuff. Only a psychopath would do that. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 13:16

Then she gets on her Vespa and heads into Bakersfield.

SPEAKER_01 13:20

It's a sweet Vespa. There are two really cool things in this movie. The Vespa is really cool, and her car is so cool.

SPEAKER_00 13:29

Oh, really? Yeah, it is pretty cool. I mean, I think so. Yeah, old car. It's an old car.

SPEAKER_02 13:34

Yeah, yeah, beautiful. Beautiful. Nice, nice blue. Ooh, yeah, come on.

SPEAKER_00 13:38

Uh, we have some really nice titles. Whoever did the titles, titles are that's so interesting. I hate them.

SPEAKER_01 13:45

I hate the titles. It's why are we freeze frame? We like do these shaky real-world cams and we freeze frame. I was just like, this is so hokey. I don't like it. So there's some of them that just blend into the shot, and the shot is still live. But then they're like a bunch of them, they're driving by and they freeze on it. Why are you freeze? It's making me sick. It's making me physically nauseous to watch this.

SPEAKER_00 14:07

I don't like them. I just like the the shots of Bakersfield and the how they sort of integrated things. I I didn't notice any of the freeze frames or I didn't notice any of that.

SPEAKER_01 14:16

Well, they happen, Dan, and they're jarring, okay? Make me sick. Wow. Uh we just it's the first note that I wrote, Dan. I said, I just so strongly hate these credits with these awful freeze frames. That's it. That's one of four notes that I wrote of the whole movie.

SPEAKER_00 14:35

We get to a hotel room, there's clothes on the floor, we're post-sex, there's a red desk, there's a red dress on the floor. There's a red dress. What I wrote, dead woman, not a client, was a client. Who was having sex? Who's the who's the hotel room? Who had sex in the hotel room?

SPEAKER_01 14:55

I think it was just like a random hookup for Margaret Qually, right?

SPEAKER_00 15:00

Oh, was it with a woman?

SPEAKER_01 15:03

I want to say yes, yeah. Because she's like, Oh, that was great.

SPEAKER_00 15:07

And then she's like, get out. Okay. So she leaves. Oh, she gets a call, she goes to the crash site, we find out that it's a dead woman. Uh, Charlie, what's his name? Is the detective Day?

SPEAKER_01 15:20

Charlie Day.

SPEAKER_00 15:21

Charlie Day. Uh his name is Marty. He's the detective, she's honey. And then we started to do this whole she's a client, she's not a client. I don't know why he would have called her.

SPEAKER_01 15:32

I don't know either. Unless I don't know either. Yep.

The “Period Interest” Theory

SPEAKER_00 15:37

Yeah. And also we're gonna find out that the Vespa woman caused the car crash somehow. I think they sort of have some weird explanation.

SPEAKER_01 15:47

Because I'm actually not crystal clear about this because it almost felt like uh spoiler alert, Aubrey Plaza was almost like taking credit for it at one point. And I was like, What?

SPEAKER_00 16:02

Sort of. Right. So I Aubrey Plaza cut her up and then she drove away, and then this woman like. Sabotaged her car so she crashed and died because they didn't want it. Maybe, maybe she knew that she was dying maybe the French woman knew she was dying from the cuts, so she sabotaged her car so that she would die and they wouldn't find the body, and she was able to get the ring that ties back to Chris Evans's. Doesn't make any sense to me. Why are you handing out rings that tie back to your church?

SPEAKER_01 16:43

Well, especially if it's a dirty church, you know what I mean? Yeah. Uh if it was a clean church, I'd understand because there's no reason for that to come back and bite you. I have no idea. Also, like, did everyone have a ring? I that's the only one we ever saw, right? Yeah. As far as I know?

SPEAKER_03 16:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 16:59

I got nothing. Don't make any sense.

SPEAKER_00 17:01

So that's that's some of the mystery of this.

SPEAKER_01 17:06

And so is it a mystery or is it just kind of poorly written? Oh, it's terribly written. Hard to be sure. Hard to be sure.

SPEAKER_00 17:13

Terribly written.

SPEAKER_01 17:13

Yeah. Well, yeah, you're right about that.

SPEAKER_00 17:15

Because you gotta you gotta have the person hire the private eye for the private eye to be private eyeing. Like, why is that?

SPEAKER_01 17:22

Well, because otherwise the private eye that they get paid to investigate, it's what they do. They don't just investigate willy-nilly. Yeah. That's that's a silly way to run your business. Yeah. That's like us doing this podcast for free for no reason. Silly. Silly way to do business.

SPEAKER_00 17:39

Boom, she's in the office. Um, the most annoying character in the whole movie is her secretary, assistant.

SPEAKER_02 17:49

Yes, I don't know. One of those, both of those, a mixture of both.

SPEAKER_00 17:53

Of a movie that we don't understand the characters, her character. We don't even begin to there's there's there's not she just says, We don't even really try. She just says stuff that's like, uh, you don't like coffee, but I can make you coffee. I don't have you make me coffee because there's a guy downstairs that needs to make a living making coffee. But I is she is the assistant constantly wanting to have sex with her or hitting on her, or I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 18:21

Yeah, maybe I don't know. Nope, you sure don't.

SPEAKER_00 18:25

You know, what was the what was that one movie? Oh, there's that great Chris Kristen Stewart made that great holiday lesbian rom com. Did you watch that one?

SPEAKER_01 18:39

Yeah, is that what is that, the best holida best Christmas ever or something? Something something weird. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know what you're talking about.

SPEAKER_00 18:46

Great movie. It was a rom-com, and they were lesbians, and whatever. This movie is like whatever. We have to make all lesbians care about is sex or something. I I it just wants to say some weird message.

SPEAKER_01 19:05

I guess. In the movie, not in real, I just mean in the movie, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 19:09

It's just it just seems weird. Like It is weird. Why don't you just make these characters if they have sex at some point? Well, that's fine, but No, that's not as much fun though, Dan.

SPEAKER_01 19:20

You you know what I'm saying? Is that what it is? Is it supposed to be fun when all these things happen? I don't know, because I didn't have very much fun watching this movie, tell you that. But what it did allow me to do is get back into Pokemon TCG pocket. I'd kind of fallen out, but I was watching this and I was like, I should just play a video game. So it's nice.

SPEAKER_00 19:40

So the assistant is just weird, comes in, says weird stuff, leaves. Uh there's no reason for her to be there. You you have a hard time believing she's being paid by honey. Yeah, I none of it makes any sense. But then we get introduced to Billy Eichner's character.

SPEAKER_01 19:56

Ah, Billy. Poor sweet Billy.

SPEAKER_00 20:00

Uh he's by far the worst actor in this movie.

SPEAKER_01 20:03

Is he a bad actor? Or is this just like a bad? Because I mean, yes. Let me just let me preface whatever I'm gonna say by yes, he was really, really bad in this role slash movie. It was weird, it was awkward, it was bad. But like I like him in Noelle. He's very funny in Noel. Did you see Noel? I didn't see Noel. In Noelle, he plays the the weird cousin who's like very, very into so it's that movie's about like Santa and and Noelle becoming Santa. Bill Hader is Santa. And the the cut Bill Hader goes missing, so they're like looking for another Santa, and they hire uh Eichner's character, and he's very into like making it smart, and he's like, Well, this many kids can't be good. So the naughty list has to be way bigger because it's just not pot like he's very pragmatic and he's very funny. Yeah. So I just I have to I have to believe he's not this bad, you know. So I guess I blame Ethan. I think that's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_00 21:11

Okay, yeah. So you've you've seen, I mean, uh he has his show with Julie Klausner, terrible people.

SPEAKER_01 21:18

I haven't watched that, so I don't I can't compare that.

SPEAKER_00 21:21

Super fun. He's playing a heightened version of himself.

SPEAKER_02 21:26

Sure, great, you know, and it's great, super fun, great show, great.

SPEAKER_00 21:32

So, but I but he wasn't acting in that. So I was like, well, here he has to act.

SPEAKER_01 21:38

I get what you're saying, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:39

And I don't yeah, like you, you know, it's like on the day, is this the director not understanding what he needs to get out of him?

SPEAKER_01 21:46

I don't know. You know, maybe very, very possible. I think so. I'm gonna say yes. That's I'm just gonna go ahead and say yes. He's a clean freak bit. I'm calling it right now, everybody.

SPEAKER_00 21:56

Actually, he has a good uh he has a clean freak bit where he has to wipe down the chair. That was good. It's a good bit.

SPEAKER_01 22:02

That's a funny bit. It's before he starts talking. That's why it's it's still good. And then it and then it all falls apart. He does a COVID joke.

SPEAKER_00 22:09

It was a funny COVID joke. Yeah. Um, he's being cheated on, and then she gives him this sort of thing where it's like, if you think you're being cheated on, you're being cheated on. You shouldn't hire me. He's like, I have to know I'm hiring you.

unknown 22:22

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 22:23

It's a weird speech to give because that's gotta be like 90% of her business, right? Would be cheating spouses.

SPEAKER_00 22:30

Well, you need to then follow that up, which is like, yeah, I know uh I I give everyone the speech, no one ever listens to the speech. That's that's great. Yeah, yeah. There's a nice qualifying yeah, you need to qualify for sure. And she's like, you know, I I don't know why I give this speech. I've given the speech hundreds of times, and no one has ever listened to me. Yeah. So I I get it, you know, but she doesn't even she doesn't even connect with him, really.

SPEAKER_01 22:58

No, not at all.

Titles, Freeze Frames, And Style Gripes

SPEAKER_00 22:59

Not at all. Uh she goes to visit her sister at the trailer park, big family, sister has all these weird kids.

SPEAKER_01 23:08

Lots of this is my least favorite scene in the movie.

SPEAKER_00 23:10

Overlapping dialogue with introduction of kids. We d we and yet not.

SPEAKER_01 23:16

Oh, sorry, you finish your thought. I'm sorry. I just have I yeah.

SPEAKER_00 23:19

The idea of a scene is to set us up for the future. This one, we're just like, here's a bunch of information thrown at you so quickly, you're gonna have no idea what you're supposed to take away from this scene.

SPEAKER_01 23:33

Yes, yeah, here's what I'll say the dialogue didn't overlap, and that's my problem. The dialogue itself doesn't follow uh a line. What's that called? You know what I'm saying? A straight line. Nope. Um and there's a lot of competing lines, but there's not over there, it's so choreographed. Uh-oh. Like it's so she'll say one line talking to the her sister, and then a kid will come in and bring up something totally different. Someone will remark on that, someone so like we have a bunch of cross talk, but none of it is overlapping. It's all very, very choreographed where it doesn't feel real to me at all. So even like the little kid who's like, hey, are you menstruating? Like, it's I mean, sure. I that one sticks out because what the hell is happening? Um, but it's that kid would be talking more than just like, okay, now it's my turn. And now it's my turn. And now it's my turn. That's not the way the world works, right? Like they would each be throwing their ideas out quickly and like overlapping each other. And people would be like, What is we would we should be we should get a little whiplash in this scene. And we don't get whiplash, we just walk away being like, What just happened? That was nonsense. I don't know. I this was my least favorite scene in the whole movie. In a movie that I did not enjoy very much, this was the bottom of the barrel.

SPEAKER_00 25:06

Got it. She brought great fruit. We we do I don't know, never never referenced again. You know, it's like nope. Everything in a movie is is a you know, you should be putting something into this scene that pays off much. Yeah, I uh our but our buddy Todd just wrote a movie, and I was saying that. I was like, he he's got the he's got the plot, plot's great, and now you gotta figure out all those little things that get all the little pieces of color, all the little bursts of color that like why does it make it?

Honey’s Setup: Office, Assistant, Client

SPEAKER_01 25:39

Color is is a good way of saying it. Yeah, like and when you say pay it off later, it doesn't have to be a big thing. It's not like a plot has to a plot point has to be about it. It just has to say something about this character that is true now and also true at the end of the movie. Yeah, like those that's the kind of thing we're saying. Like the through line has to be there. It doesn't have to be a big moment, it should just be like, yes, this makes sense for this character. I see this as this character the all the way through, right? Like, so let me know that this is her in some way, shape, or form throughout the movie. This is just something that someone thought was funny, I think.

SPEAKER_00 26:14

Yeah, you know, like I don't I don't know what that means. Because that's the thing, is if you put the color in there and then you don't let it be anything, then I then I'm confused. I'm like, uh what's happening? It's because I'll think back and I'm like I'm looking at this, I'm like, why was there grapefruits? As opposed to at the two-thirds of the way through the movie, she's in a supermarket and she buys more grapefruits. I'm like, oh yeah, this sort of thing.

SPEAKER_01 26:38

She loves grapefruits. She loves grapefruits. Right. That's awesome. I've never had a grapefruit. Just a random side note that I'm I've never had a grapefruit before. You big grapefruit guy. Top three fruits. Top three? Wait, that's a crazy statement. What do you top three? What? Fruit? Food?

SPEAKER_00 27:04

Fruit. All food? No food.

SPEAKER_01 27:06

All food.

SPEAKER_00 27:07

All food? No, that's so fruit. Top three fruit? Problem is I take a I take a statin, which is a pill. You can't that's the one thing you can't eat when you take a statin pill. It's just grapefruit. Your top three fruit of all time.

SPEAKER_01 27:23

You can't have that's a bummer. Oh, that's I love grapefruit. Oh, it's so yeah. If you didn't believe in a god before, that's gotta affirm your belief right there. But you can eat oranges.

SPEAKER_00 27:32

Oranges, very similar, and I eat or I eat an orange every day because I like oranges, but they're just they're just there's just something in the grapefruit?

SPEAKER_01 27:40

Yeah. Wow. Yeah, huh. Well, I'm sorry, Dan. That's a bummer. Top three fruits is pretty high.

SPEAKER_00 27:48

Probably number two. Strawberries, I think, probably not strawberries, probably strawberry, cherries, grapefruit. Those are the three. Big three.

SPEAKER_01 27:54

Oh, with cherry, like pitted cherries, like real cherries, not like maraschino cherries.

SPEAKER_00 27:58

No, maraschino cherries.

SPEAKER_01 28:00

Oh, really? You like just little Sunday cherries?

SPEAKER_00 28:02

I don't know. I love marasino cherries as a kid. Now I'm like, they're okay, but they're weird. Yeah, I mean they're fine.

SPEAKER_01 28:07

They're just very sweet and like fresh cherry.

SPEAKER_00 28:10

Yeah, probably strawberries, fresh cherries, grapefruit.

SPEAKER_01 28:12

I think strawberries are overrated, guys. I'm just gonna throw that out there. All right, we can go back to this movie. I was just curious if you had grapefruit. Turns out you you love it, and I'm sorry that brought it up.

SPEAKER_00 28:21

Tony's favorite fruit, uh, tricks, cereal.

SPEAKER_01 28:25

Uh, first tricks, fruit loops, fruity pebbles, boom. Three three sources of fruit from me.

SPEAKER_00 28:32

Okay, so I don't know what this scene is about. We meet the sister. The sister's about nothing. Oh, we we meet the her niece, who's like a punk rocker, goes out with a bad boy. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 28:44

Who beats her. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 28:46

Never never seen that blunt before.

SPEAKER_01 28:48

Yeah, no, definitely not.

SPEAKER_00 28:50

Yeah, we'll talk about all that stuff. There's a lot to talk about in this terrible movie. Okay, now we meet Chris Evans, he's Reverend Drew, he's fucking the congregation, fucking his way through the congregation.

SPEAKER_02 29:01

All of them. Yeah, yeah, all of them.

SPEAKER_00 29:03

She's trying to hold a mirror so he can look at himself or look at her boobs.

Church, Drugs, And The Reverend

SPEAKER_01 29:08

No, no, no, no. He wants he well, he it's going back. So, yeah, at first a little bit of himself and then tilt it down to see her bosom as he's as he's doing her. Um, what a weird, what a weird thing to think of. I never seen anything like this before in my life. Uh, I was shocked. I did laugh, I'll be honest. I was like, what is happening? This is crazy. So kudos. Kudos to that, I guess.

SPEAKER_00 29:34

There it is. Uh uh second of command comes in, he's like, someone's dead. Uh he's like, why did you interrupt me? Because if someone's dead, why are you interrupting me?

SPEAKER_01 29:44

Yeah, what is the running bit about people walking in on him having sex?

SPEAKER_00 29:49

I didn't understand the bit I think the implication is that he runs a loose ship, I think. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 30:02

I I guess I could see that. And then, you know, the French are upset because of the same reason, really. Loose ship. Okay, yeah. I guess I'll buy it. I'll buy it. It's weird. I don't like it, but I'll buy it.

SPEAKER_00 30:14

I would not walk in on my boss if he was if he was a reverend having sex with somebody.

SPEAKER_01 30:18

I just wouldn't do that. I don't think I would walk in on my boss if his door was closed. You knock on a closed door. I don't understand who these people are, they're just walking into rooms willy-nilly where the doors are shut.

SPEAKER_00 30:31

Oh, we do a we do a big Joey, little Joey, and it's an OD, and then he gets mad at this guy for using. So we're setting up that uh they deal drugs. Yeah. And he gets mad at the second in command because he doesn't want him using uh using drugs. We do a shakeweight joke. We slip in a shakeweight joke that that just crashes and burn. I mean, it doesn't crash and burn because it's in 1997. I like I don't understand. It's it's so dead on arrival, it doesn't even crash and burn. It just is like wah wah.

SPEAKER_01 31:09

Yeah, it doesn't even get to the starting line, in my opinion.

SPEAKER_00 31:12

It doesn't even be like that.

SPEAKER_01 31:16

No, it twists its ankle walking out to the starting line. Uh yeah, what a weird joke. And then it's followed up by a joke that I really like, which is an unfortunate one-two punch because it really lessens the second joke. Uh, because I'm like, what are you talking about? But he's dragging the body away of his dead son or whatever, and he's going like out the gate, and then he's like, Where the hell is he going? It's like, well, he parked at Walmart or something like that. And I was like, that's funny. That's funny.

SPEAKER_00 31:45

Yeah, that was funny. Okay, we cut the honey's at a dive bar, and there's this weird piano lady that's playing the part of like, I don't know, like, I'm I'm narrating while I'm playing the piano. It's just so it's so weird. It's not great.

SPEAKER_02 32:00

And it's not great.

SPEAKER_00 32:02

And it's like, I think it's only in this scene, and you're just like, what is happening? Um, and we find out from the bartender that the Miranda, the dead girl, had only worked here for a little while. Uh and she's got uh parents, so you can go talk to them, but they won't talk to anybody or something. Oh, maybe she hasn't learned that yet.

SPEAKER_01 32:25

Something. You learned something though.

SPEAKER_00 32:27

We cut to the pool. Here is uh here is uh the reverend. We're making the money exchange to the French connection. So the French connection girl, we find out that she took care of the woman, he gives the money, and we find out that there's too many dead people, and you know, that's gonna if there's too many dead people, people are gonna start paying some attention and problems can ensue. Okay. Sure.

SPEAKER_01 32:52

Which, you know, logic makes sense to me.

SPEAKER_00 32:55

Honey's at the police station to get the address of the dead woman's parents. Very good. Charlie Day just hits on her again.

Bar Leads And French Connection

SPEAKER_01 33:04

For the second time. Yeah, all he does is every time he's on screen, just hits on her. And then she says, I'm into women. He's like, You say that every time. And it's like, well, yeah, she is. She's into women. This is a weird, I don't know. I don't get it. Uh, but then she goes downstairs. You want to talk about that? I was I was just setting it up for you. You know what I mean? Well, I wasn't setting it up for you to talk about Aubrey Plaza.

SPEAKER_00 33:27

Yeah, how's Aubrey Plaza do?

SPEAKER_01 33:30

She's not great. I I wasn't I wasn't into it. Does she got in her defense? So like the the line is super weird. Honey's walking away, and she says, I love the click clack of your heels. That's not that's not verbiage a normal person would use.

SPEAKER_00 33:48

It's kind of kind of weird. It's kind of noir movie-esque.

SPEAKER_01 33:52

It's kind of so I kind I got noir vibe several times, but not in a like a good way.

SPEAKER_03 33:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 33:58

In a way where I was like, this movie might think that it's noir, but it's not.

SPEAKER_00 34:03

If you watch the Hudsucker Proxy, which is another. Yeah, I mean just watched that.

SPEAKER_01 34:10

That was like one of the ones I enjoyed. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 34:12

Hudsucker proxy is like, hey, you wanna talk like this? What's going on? Uh meet head, you know, it's they they try and do that dialogue.

SPEAKER_01 34:20

Charlie Day is doing a little. A little. Yeah. Yeah. Um anyhow. Awful. Has she have they met each other before? It doesn't seem like it because she says honey, right? As a question. Yeah. But she calls her MG, which makes me think that she does know her. I d I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 34:44

You need to either make this like a long-term thing, or uh first. It's like it sort of dances in between, and you're just like, I don't know what the I don't understand what these characters are.

SPEAKER_01 34:55

It's just kind of weird because you know that Charlie Day and her have been doing this dance forever. Forever. Yeah. So I'm just, I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 35:05

Yeah, you know, they they want it to be a meeting, but they also don't want it to be a meeting. It's like, well, you gotta you gotta pick one or the other, otherwise, uh, you know, I don't know. We're confused. Yeah, we're confused. We don't know if you know each other, who they are, what's going on. Because they kind of act like they both have this is the first time they've realized that they're in the presence of another lesbian.

SPEAKER_02 35:24

Sure.

SPEAKER_00 35:25

And you're like, well, that doesn't make any sense.

SPEAKER_01 35:29

Because neither of them are hiding it all that well. I'll say that. No, you know what I mean.

SPEAKER_00 35:33

I mean, she's honey's like saying it out loud. I prefer girls. She's just yelling, she's yelling it across the cop station.

SPEAKER_01 35:40

So she, yeah, she's telling everybody.

SPEAKER_00 35:42

There's no uh yeah. Okay, um oh here we go. So we go to this high-end bar, there's this guy waiting for a date, and then a drug dealer comes that works for the Rev, and he's got his money, he's got the drugs, but he won't give him the drugs, so they go outside.

SPEAKER_01 36:07

Yeah, well, because the other guy hasn't paid. The guy hasn't paid. He's like a payment behind.

SPEAKER_00 36:11

Payment behind, and he's all like, okay, I'll just suck your dick. This guy punches him uh in the p face, and then he ends up getting in his car and then hitting the guy with his car and then dragging him like out the lot.

SPEAKER_01 36:27

Which is very funny visually.

The Parking Lot Drag Gag

SPEAKER_00 36:30

It was fun. I've just remembered that was funny.

SPEAKER_01 36:32

It's not as funny as Taylor Swift. Is it was it Taylor Swift? What movie was it that Amsterdam, where they like knocked out Taylor Swift or whatever, and then gets run over by the car. Three times.

SPEAKER_00 36:47

Well, yes, because it's not Taylor Swift.

SPEAKER_01 36:49

If this guy had been somebody, you you might have watched it three times because it would have been funny. That's true, you're right about that. Because it visually was pretty funny, but very confusing. Oh, think about it. Amsterdam was so good. That was such a weird movie. What a movie, yeah. And now I'm gonna ask you. Okay, yeah. Oh, you know, but ask me a question, yeah. Who is this character? Yeah, see, so I don't know who he is. I don't know what he's got to do with anything. He's Billy Eichner's boyfriend, right?

SPEAKER_00 37:18

I did not realize that until the movie.

SPEAKER_01 37:22

Oh, after the movie. I didn't realize it until we go back to Billy, and she was like, Well, he was meeting a date, but didn't meet a date. He's dead, I'm sorry, goodbye. And I was like, that was the guy? Very confusing.

SPEAKER_00 37:35

I I had no idea what she was talking about, and I just watched that, you know, I'd be like, wow.

SPEAKER_01 37:39

But what's confusing to me is like, why is he on drugs? Like, what is that? Why didn't Billy know he was on drugs? It's to tie it all together. It's uh but it doesn't tie it together, it just makes it looser, in my opinion. Yes, I don't like it. Yeah, and I and then he was just like offering blowjobs to uh random strangers, then basically. That's kind of cool. And it's like he was supposed to be Billy's boyfriend? Like, that's not boyfriend material, right? It's not something I don't I'm very confused. He's a cheater. Well, there's a difference between cheating and just like blowing strangers on the street, you know what I mean? Like the way that Billy Eichner's character is talking, it's like we're in a serious relationship and he's cheating on me with someone, not everyone. He's not sleeping with everyone we've ever known before. I just I don't know. I was just very confused.

SPEAKER_00 38:28

It was weird. Uh, okay. Uh how do you sees the Vespa lady at random? Okay, don't know what that means.

SPEAKER_02 38:36

Sure, sure.

SPEAKER_00 38:37

Uh motel, mom, your daughter lets her in. Oh, okay. She goes to the mom of the girl's house, the mom of the dead girl, and then we have just this weird sort of Coheny brothers thing where she finds the church robe and then she finds some bondage gear.

SPEAKER_01 39:01

In the church robe, right? Like they were together.

SPEAKER_00 39:04

Like anyone would store them that way together. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 39:09

You know, I like to hang my outfits that go together as well, Dan. All right. So I have layers upon layers. I stuff it, fold it, stuff it, fold it. It's like a Russian nesting doll of my clothes. Uh yeah, I don't. This is And it's such a weird scene with the dad in the other room. He don't know. Blah. Right? Yeah, she doesn't know. Yeah, I told you she didn't know.

Family Trailer Park Detour

SPEAKER_00 39:34

Why why? What I think it is, is they've written this weird movie, and then they're like, okay, let's put some weird Cohen Brothers characters. Here's a Cohen Brothers character. Everyone will be like, ah, Cohen Brothers character. But when the movie doesn't work, weird Cohen Brothers characters just makes it even weirder and worse.

SPEAKER_01 39:52

It's weird. Yeah, it's just weird and out of place in a weird movie. So it's not great. It's not great.

SPEAKER_00 39:59

Uh Okay, the reverend's preaching. And then he does this whole oh God. He's preaching to the people, and then he does the whole macaroni uh the macaroni.

SPEAKER_01 40:14

I mean, this is the worst church in the world. I don't believe that people would go to a church like that and be into it. Because they're doing a call and answer with macaroni. That's bananas. All right. It's too weird to be re like, you know, like, come on. Macaroni. He's macaroni. What are you talking about? This doesn't belong in a church. Even a sex church. Which, by the way, I would belong to.

SPEAKER_00 40:50

There it is.

SPEAKER_01 40:50

Sex church.

SPEAKER_00 40:51

Uh, the second uh once again, we're back in his his secret room, not his secret room, but his his private room. And the guy's just a regular room, right? The dude comes in there and he tells him the story about how the the dude got killed by their guy, and so then Chris Evans character is like, oh, we gotta kill him. And the guy's like, oh.

SPEAKER_01 41:12

This is my favorite scene. Oh, okay. Well, you talking about it. I like this scene. Do you like did you like this scene? It's a it's a it's it could be a good scene in a good movie. Sure, oh sure. Of course, of course. I just, you know, I love Chris Evans. He's good, it turns out. I honestly didn't know that I loved Chris Evans until recently. Okay. And now, even when I see him in bad movies, like when we watched that stupid Christmas action movie with him in The Rock. Is that Red One? Red Notice? No. Red Red One. Red One, thank you. Red One. I still like him. I liked him. Terrible movie. Didn't like the movie, still thought he was funny. So similar thing here. Turns out I really like him. Um, except for when he's Captain America, it's trash. Um I'm kidding. I know you I know. I was just kidding.

SPEAKER_00 42:00

You mean the greatest movie, the greatest superhero movie ever, Winter Soldier?

SPEAKER_01 42:04

Sure, the the second the sequel, sure. The first one. What a dullard.

SPEAKER_00 42:09

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 42:10

Uh I don't understand. No, you don't understand. If you make a perfect movie, it's a perfect movie.

SPEAKER_00 42:16

It doesn't matter. Oh, yeah. Tell me about how great Iron Man 3 is.

SPEAKER_01 42:21

Uh first of all, Iron Man Three is a great film because it's a Christmas film. You know what I mean? Uh Shane Black, dude. Oh, listen, he can't do wrong. He can't do any wrong. He did. He really did. Uh we gotta watch this new movie pretty soon, by the way.

SPEAKER_00 42:39

What's it called?

Cop Shop Flirtation And MG

SPEAKER_01 42:40

What's it called? Uh I don't remember. But it's got Mark Wahlberg in it. Oh, piece of trash. It's on Amazon Prime. Okay. Anyhow, we'll we'll talk about it probably next week. Um, what was I talking about? Uh the the the Oh, I like this scene. Yeah, yeah, I like this scene. It's fun, it's a fun uh, you know, reversal. Like uh we're talking about two different things. Yeah. There there was a witness that saw the the bartender saw the kid run over the guy, told the cops. Chris Evans, like, we gotta kill him. The guy thinks he's talking about the witness, the bartender, and Chris Evans gets the line, why the fuck would we kill the bartender? Which just made me laugh very.

SPEAKER_00 43:25

He's already talked to the police.

SPEAKER_01 43:27

That was like, because he's- He's already talked, yeah, he's that ship has sailed. I thought he was talking about killing the bartender. That's what I really thought. That's what yeah, that's why it's funny. It's because you're you're on that side, and then he gets to call us all idiots because we've all done it wrong. We're all bad criminals. That's what's great about it. Uh yeah, he was like, no, that ship has sailed. We gotta kill the kid because the kid's the loose end now. Great stuff. Anyway, I thought it was a funny scene. I enjoyed it. Good scene.

SPEAKER_00 43:52

It was a good scene. You're correct. So there's two good scenes in this movie.

SPEAKER_01 43:54

Um did we already talk about your good scene? I can't remember. I'll say it. Okay, good. Save it. No, I won't save it. I'll talk about it when we get to it. Save it till the end. Skip it during the initial thing, then come back to it at the end.

SPEAKER_00 44:07

Okay, we now we go to the the kids, the guy goes there to kill him, and we have a he's he cuts the throat of the mom, which is really weird.

SPEAKER_01 44:17

So it's weird because it's not like a mistake. No, it's gonna kill everybody, he just does it. Yeah, and then the kid finds the grandma dead on the floor, and he says, Hey, you kill my grandma, and the Australian guy just says, It's not it's just business or whatever, it's not personal, whatever he says. I was like, But why did you you didn't have to kill that woman?

SPEAKER_00 44:40

Did you like when he saw the reflection of the guy coming up behind him in her eye? No, because it didn't look real at all.

SPEAKER_01 44:46

That's not what he would have seen. He would see himself at least in the shot. That was just a silhouette of the whole human. That's not how anything works. He would he would at least see it over his shoulder or something. It was so terrible. That's ridiculous.

SPEAKER_00 45:01

It was so terrible. And then they fight, and I guess the one guy lives. I guess the kid lives. I thought I thought they both died.

SPEAKER_01 45:10

He gets did he get stabbed or shot? I can't remember.

SPEAKER_00 45:14

The other guy got shot.

SPEAKER_01 45:15

Yeah. So then he runs away already bleeding to death. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 45:20

Uh Honey meets with Billy Eichner and says that his guy is dead. Alright.

SPEAKER_01 45:27

Yeah. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 45:29

She goes to her Rolodex, and then the assistant comes in and is like, why do you use that Rolodex? I'll make you a computers talk. You know, like I I can comment on Tony's clothes every time we do this podcast.

SPEAKER_01 45:46

Try it. Try it. This is look at this shit. This is Entourage drawn in the style of the cart a cartoon. I can't remember which cartoon this is. Which cartoon is this? I think it's Stranger Things, isn't it? It's the um where he's got a he's got a tiger for a friend. What's that called? Calvin and Hobbs. I think it's Calvin and Hobbes style. Oh, Jesus. Yeah, it looks like it. Oh my god, I got a hole in this shirt. You're right. You could comment on this stuff.

SPEAKER_00 46:14

I don't comment on it because every everyone can see it with the.

SPEAKER_01 46:17

Well, you did this time. One of 270. So you talk a big game, damn good stuff.

SPEAKER_00 46:24

So you know, it's like, I don't know, man. It's like, you know, when what do they say in improv? Don't just comment on everything, right?

Best Scene: Kill The Kid, Not The Witness

SPEAKER_01 46:32

They I oh boy, I used to get that note all the time. All the time, because everyone was so stupid. Everyone was doing a bad scene, so the bet the only way I could have fun was just to call it out and make you look like a fool. Apparently, that's not good teamwork.

SPEAKER_00 46:48

Okay. Um, cut to its night, we go to the cop bar, honey goes in there to see uh MG, and then we have the fingering scene.

SPEAKER_01 47:00

In public, I don't I don't understand, Dan. Why is this happening?

SPEAKER_00 47:07

I don't get I don't get it. Because the people that made this movie wanna imagine the two of them fingering each other.

SPEAKER_01 47:15

That's it. I listen, I'm not the most not attentive. I don't notice things. I don't there's a word for that that I was trying to say.

SPEAKER_00 47:24

Yeah, I know what you're saying. Yeah, me too. My wife's like, you're clueless. And I'm like, I'm fairly clueless, but no.

SPEAKER_01 47:31

I am. But if I was at a bar, I'm pretty sure I could clock two ladies' finger in each other. I'm sorry. That's not something that's very easily hidden. I'd be like, hey, why is her arm going up the other one's dressed? That's just ridiculous. It was just weird. Don't get it. It's just weird. Super weird. And then they're having like a conversation about something totally different that wasn't sexually that didn't build any sexual tension at all. Knitting and crochet, knitting and crochet are different. Right, like like they're different things. No, they're the same thing. Hey, you're inside me. What's happening? I don't understand this movie sometimes.

SPEAKER_00 48:10

And then it's like if this was like a I don't know, if this actually meant something, but then we just go back to the room for graphic sex.

SPEAKER_01 48:19

Yeah, yeah, they just go do it. Yeah, they do it.

SPEAKER_00 48:23

Yep. We end the graphic sex, and then we have her washing sex toys in the sink.

SPEAKER_01 48:31

Which is, first of all, responsible. So good for them for showing that you should clean up.

SPEAKER_00 48:37

I guess. It's just it just once again, it's like it's just weird? It's just weird for being just like, I don't know. It's just like weird for being weird.

SPEAKER_01 48:50

Weird for weird's sake. That's kind of their thing.

SPEAKER_00 48:53

You know, like show these, show these things, show these people as characters, right? Like if if that was like if Billy Eichner's character did something like this, where we set it up with him cleaning off a chair. If she did something like that, she's all like, okay, this this is this person. Then they had graphic six, and then they clean. I'm like, okay, that's this, that's this lady. Sure. I want to know this lady. It doesn't tell me anything about the character by showing me this.

SPEAKER_01 49:20

Yeah. It shows it's like just teaches you a good lesson. Pay attention, kids.

SPEAKER_00 49:26

And boom, here comes the niece. She's crying, she's been beat up. We throw in a Tom of Finland joke.

SPEAKER_01 49:35

Which I I still, even now that you said it, I still don't know what that is. Now, did you clock that there was a Tom of Finland joke? No, I clocked it. There was a bunch of stuff that people were saying that I didn't understand. And I was like, what are we talking about?

Home Invasion And Grandma

SPEAKER_00 49:48

Tom of Finland is this very graphic uh gay sex artist. He did a lot of gay sex drawings of these, you know, big beefy biker men. Anyone who knows who Tom of Finland is knows who Tom of Finland is, but it's like sure, it is a it is an obscure You think Shakewait's an obscure joke. Tom of Finland is a very deep cut. And if you tell a good joke, and we've talked about this before, and I still completely believe it, I can watch people make jokes about politicians I've never heard of. Yeah, I will laugh because they know how to make a joke that tells you the essence of who this person is. If I just That's the difference between a reference and a joke. That's the difference between a reference, and they just reference Tom of Finland as if it's funny.

SPEAKER_01 50:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 50:37

And it's not funny. You didn't laugh.

SPEAKER_01 50:38

You were like, I you were like because I didn't understand what it meant. Yeah, I have no idea. I've never heard Tom uh is it Tom of Finland? Or what are you saying? Tom of Finland.

SPEAKER_00 50:48

Okay, yeah. That's that's like that's like his art artistic name, uh artist name, you know, if it's art by Tom of Finland. I don't know if he was from there or whatever, but very, very, very graphic stuff, very specific stuff, and I love it. Probably also not a thing that uh lesbian would probably be joking about or care about.

SPEAKER_01 51:07

Sure.

SPEAKER_00 51:07

Yeah, there you go. It's more of a male gay joke, which like okay, sure, I don't understand.

SPEAKER_01 51:14

Well, baby joke.

SPEAKER_00 51:17

And then the the niece is like, don't tell my mother, don't tell my mother, and so she's like, I won't tell your mother.

SPEAKER_01 51:24

How how first unrelated to the move just as a human, you have to tell the mother. That's you can't not tell the mother.

SPEAKER_00 51:32

We can talk about let's talk about we'll talk about that when we get to it. Okay, all right. Because there's an interesting thing that happens that I don't understand in this movie.

SPEAKER_01 51:42

Oh, okay, just one.

SPEAKER_00 51:44

Uh yeah. Um the robe, she figures out that the robe is the reverend. Boom, now we're at the we're at the reverends. He's having sex with two girls now in bondage gear.

SPEAKER_02 51:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 51:59

Hector comes in with a gun to kid, and he kills he kills the kid, right? Yeah, he kills the kid.

SPEAKER_01 52:06

Yeah, so what's his name? Hector. Hector comes in, and there's a big scene where he's yelling at Chris Evans, and then Chris is like, Hey, I'm having sex. And five minutes into this scene is the first time Hector realizes there's two naked ladies on top of him, which is a very weird sequence of events. And then he closes his eyes and starts shooting, and somehow all three of them have disappeared, and then uh he appears behind them, clocks them, and then shoots him in the head.

SPEAKER_00 52:37

You can't be kidding he's a reverend murdering a guy in cold blood with two women female parishioners. They're gonna be running in the streets. It's it's it's it's over.

SPEAKER_01 52:49

He's it's over. Or he's just gotta kill all three of them. Or I mean that's what he's gotta do.

SPEAKER_00 52:54

Or pack it up, or whatever. No, yeah. I thought I thought we were gonna see them both dead on the ground. Sure. And then him like, oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 53:04

Oh, you killed him.

SPEAKER_00 53:07

And then he's the girls are crying, and he says, Big help you were to them.

SPEAKER_02 53:14

Right. So weird. So, so, so weird.

SPEAKER_00 53:18

Uh, we go to the weeder heaven where the niece works. Were you sure that that was the niece?

SPEAKER_01 53:26

No, I wasn't. Okay, but also I was just like really distracted by whatever's happening in this scene. This guy at the drive-in who doesn't know what he wants. This is the weirdest scene in the world to me. Yeah. Like, I get not knowing you know, and you sometimes you go up there and you're just not sure. But he's just like, uh, um, can I get uh uh wiener? Well, they're all wieners. Uh can I get uh oh boy, what is it called? Like, what's happen- what what's happening?

Public Bar Romance Escalates

SPEAKER_00 53:59

There's a whole chart that tells you exactly what you can get out of fast food place. That's we've all done it a million times. Although I will uh I will say one thing. I don't know if we talked about this last week, but have you ever noticed there's always people in the grocery store that do not know how to check out on the self-checkout?

SPEAKER_01 54:20

Oh, yeah, absolutely. It's it's as if self-checkout is always brand new. To some people, it's very confusing. It's been around for a while now. We should all pretty much know how to do it. Super weird. There's always a person that's just like, I'm losing my mind.

SPEAKER_00 54:40

What's happening? See, so if this was happening at the grocery store and that was happening, we'd all be like, yep, yep, yep, yep. Sure, get it. Yeah, totally get it. There's like this old guy, and he's uh watching her. Uh did you realize who he was instantaneously?

SPEAKER_01 54:56

Oh, I did not. No. I figured it out pretty quick. Did you figure it out pretty quick? I didn't even understand it, even after when he talks to Honey, and she's like, You're my dad. I was like, Wait, are you sure? So that's her granddaughter. I don't know if I believe it. That's the granddaughter. I get it. Yeah, I got it now later. But at first I was very confused because she's like, I love you. What?

SPEAKER_00 55:19

Yeah, what's happening? And I was like, Oh, okay, I know what this is. Because we referenced the dad at one point, so I was like, here he comes, he's coming back in. Great.

SPEAKER_01 55:28

Just what we know. I mean, that makes sense. In hindsight, it makes sense, and I should have assumed it, but I I I was I was taking aback.

SPEAKER_00 55:35

Uh okay, the reverence in his thing. We didn't deal with there's dead bodies, there's people we don't deal with any of that. That just magically floats out of the.

SPEAKER_01 55:44

I assume they just have an incinerator out back and they're just cooking them up. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 55:49

Honey's card, he yells at his new second. Uh boom, she comes in there. Wait, did I did I miss the one scene I liked?

SPEAKER_02 56:00

Uh oh, what scene?

SPEAKER_00 56:09

We'll find out. Yeah, whatever. Hold on, let me go back up here. No. Okay. She is now And we we he tries to find out she honey's trying to find out what happened with the girl.

SPEAKER_02 56:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 56:37

They talk and the you know, he basically hits on honey.

SPEAKER_01 56:43

As they all do, yeah. Yeah. And he's um I don't know, even you know, he's sleazy, obviously, but he does still have a charm to him that I just feel like she doesn't have. And I think that's my problem. You know, with her in general, I think. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 57:03

It's weird. Yeah. I mean it's it's an okay scene, but once again, it doesn't go anywhere. They just sort of verbally sort of spar, and then it ain't. Uh we cut back to the wiener place, the the daughter leaves, and oh no, it's the end of the day, and the old guy's gone. Boom. We go back. Uh MG and Honey are having sex again. We have a smoke break, we talk about how they broke some what MG broke up with a girlfriend because after they'd have sex she would weep.

SPEAKER_01 57:43

Yeah, I don't know. Seems pretty rude.

SPEAKER_00 57:45

And then they bond over having terrible fathers.

SPEAKER_02 57:51

Yeah, as we as we all do, huh?

SPEAKER_00 57:54

We got back to the wiener thing, the girl is leaving, there's the old guy, his bus shows up, she wants to take the bus, can't take the bus because the old guy's by the bus, and she runs away.

SPEAKER_02 58:04

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 58:07

Next day, back at the office, the weird assistants being weird. Uh Sister spills the beans for you. Oh, the sister shows up. And honey tells inorganically tells the sister that the boyfriend is beating on the daughter.

SPEAKER_02 58:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 58:32

What did you think about how inorganic that scene was?

SPEAKER_01 58:35

Yeah, it was really dumb. I mean, I don't know what else to say. Like it was it it was an awkward conversation. The way information came out was very forced and very weird. And then she kind of yells at her on the phone and then she hangs up.

SPEAKER_00 58:51

And then Honey goes to the trailer where the kid that beat up the niece is, and she beats the shit out of him. And that was my favorite part of the movie.

SPEAKER_01 59:03

Sure, sure, I get that. But I have to, I'm a little confused. Yes. So she hits the gun on the table. I can't break it and then gets mad. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 59:13

So okay, so she's trying to break the gun so the gun can't be used. She can't break it on the table, so she has to go outside and beats it on the cinder blocks.

SPEAKER_01 59:22

I love that. And I was like, why is she hitting everything? But yeah, okay. I I thought that that's what was going on, but I just wasn't sure.

SPEAKER_00 59:29

She should have just had a dialogue with the gun. She's like, why the fuck won't you break it? You know, it's it's like you have a location where you have an actress and you have a joke that you want to get across, right? And just have her I because Margaret Quali I know can be funny. Sure. Happy Gilmore too, huh? So he has like a MAGA sticker that doesn't look like a MAGA sticker on his truck, and she slaps him with some lesbian sticker or something.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:00

I honestly didn't even understand what his was at first.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:03

I think it was a I think I said MAGA. Um I believe you. I hate hated that more than I hated that. I just hated it's just stupid. Sure.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:12

Just really stupid. Well, you know, we gotta put politics in there. It's okay.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:16

Okay. Boom.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:17

They gotta do what they gotta do.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:19

She's back at her place, and boom, the old man shows up, and when we find out that that is her dad, he's come there to apologize for beating her, and he's been, he says, I've been working on myself.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:32

My favorite line is she I don't remember exactly what he said, but she was like, Oh, you you beat me, and he's like, Well, I didn't want to beat you, and I thought that was very dark and funny.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:44

And she's like, You'll feel bad when I'm dead, and then she's like, No, I won't. No, I won't. Yep.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:50

I was like, Makes sense, you know, I get it. Yeah, that's fine.

The Niece, Abuse, And Vigilante Beatdown

SPEAKER_00 1:00:55

Um, and then she says, But then it's just kind of it, right? That gets pretty dark because she's like, You're already dead, which is Oh, that's right. Yeah, I should say that's pretty hard. It's one thing to say, you know, I'm not going, no, I'm not going to. Yeah, you know, you blew it. It's over. Yeah, you gone, boy. But then saying that he's dead, that's that's really rubbing it in.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:17

And it's just all of it feels pretty unnecessary, but that's okay.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:21

Um, she's driving around looking for Corinne, the the niece. There's a song playing. It sounds like it's sung by Margaret Qually.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:28

I think it definitely is. Oh, it is. It's it has to be. It's definitely her voice. I because that that's one of the other one of my four notes as well. I was like, did she do the soundtrack? Because I'm I feel like this is the second time I heard her voice on the soundtrack. Oh, okay. So I can't prove it, but I feel pretty strongly that she is singing some of the songs. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:51

I like the song. I liked her singing. Oh no, for sure. That's really nice.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:54

Yeah, yeah, no, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:55

She's got talent, you know. Uh she sees a bunch of bests, she sits on the bus bench, she sees an ad for the rev, and okay.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:06

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:07

She goes to the goes to the uh see Charlie Day, they go to the morgue, they find out that she had extra lacerations.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:18

What does that mean?

SPEAKER_00 1:02:20

That means she was stabbed a bunch.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:23

I know what it means, but what does it mean? I'm just doing, I'm reenacting the movie now, Dan. Oh. Because that's what Margot Qually says. She's like, what does that mean? And he says almost exactly what you said, which is like it means she was stabbed before the car accident. She's like, no, I know what it means, but what does it mean? I was like, that's it's funny.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:41

Uh the Rev has sex with the French girl. He says that that was the best sex he'd ever had.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:48

Did it did it seem like that? Did did you get that vibe?

SPEAKER_00 1:02:54

I didn't I didn't I didn't understand. No, I just I don't he's I don't think there's anything to understand. I mean, if she like had tied him up.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:04

Sure, but no, she just wants it missionary, which was a funny joke where she's like, do it stupid American style. And he's like, stupid American, just like missionary? Like, that's funny. You can you actually depressed sex is ever at?

SPEAKER_00 1:03:18

You're doing pretty good Chris Evans.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:20

Hey, thank you. Oh my god, that's so sweet of you. You're I'm Captain America, just like that. Your delivery was exactly like he said it. Wow. Well, look, there you go. Chris Evans, watch it back.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:32

You could do it. You could do Chris Evans. That'll be your your big uh one you do.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:36

Fat YouTube. Fat Chris Evans, you know, that's what everybody wants. That's what the people have been needing.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:42

And then she shoots him because that they're hit her boss is not happy with him. Right.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:47

So what happens to him?

SPEAKER_00 1:03:49

What happens to the church?

SPEAKER_01 1:03:52

This movie doesn't really answer any questions.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:54

Well, I mean it's just gonna go away. I mean, you know, he's dead. Yeah. Yeah, but like he's dead. And he's like a prominent figure. Yeah. I don't know. It just seems weird. Well, I mean, it leaves us going like, was that the end of the third act? We're like, what's what's act three? We're all left with we're left with the okay, you've done all this stuff. There's nothing we can see. Now what's the state? There's nothing we care about. Where was it all the movie?

SPEAKER_01 1:04:19

Yep. Where was it all headed? That's what I'm looking for right now. Like, okay, I see all these storylines. Now bring them all together. And they don't. They don't want to. They didn't feel like it was necessary.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:30

The French girl we do not care about. We said we have zero investment in her. Not at all. We have zero investment in MG and Honey's relationship.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:40

Of course. What relationship?

SPEAKER_00 1:04:42

We we we don't really care about the French girl getting in trouble for killing Chris Evans' character.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:49

Nope.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:49

So we really we get to this point where nothing has really happened that we cared about, and now there's literally nothing we care about.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:58

That's correct.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:58

We're not even the plot is even we feel like the plot is resolved.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:04

Right. What little plot there was to begin with, yeah.

Dead Ends At The Church

SPEAKER_00 1:05:09

Uh honey arrives and is knocking on the on the church door. She sees the French girl leave and doesn't give chase, doesn't do anything, just like goes, okay. Doesn't care. Uh goes to the precinct. Um catches her in a the payphone. Oh, uh Charlie Day catches her. She said something about I only use a payphone, I don't have a cell phone, I can't give you a cell number. He catches her in that lie, and then she once again just says, I only sleep with girls.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:42

Right. So it doesn't really matter that he caught her in the lie at all. So she's not funny.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:48

So the plot point now is that she's gonna go to MG's to what? Get help on what? Getting in to see if the Rev is alive or dead.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:03

Okay. I yeah. Oh yeah. Go to anyone. Why does she need to go to I mean she says the line, the day I could sell line, she's the only cop I feel will help me. Well why? How? How? Why? Why would everyone would help you? Like you're just trying to get into the church, right? Like that seems pretty easy. I mean I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:25

Let me ask you this question, Tony. How many detective stories have you seen where the detective breaks into the place they're not supposed to break into? All of them. Except for this one. Every other one does that. Except for this one. How many of the windows did she check? Zero. Did she walk around the perimeter? I feel like did she walk around the perimeter of the building?

SPEAKER_01 1:06:48

Check a back door, maybe? I don't know. I feel like there's probably a lot of ways inside the church.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:53

Climb through a window, blah, blah, blah, whatever. So she goes to MG's. Her house is a little old. There's a plant that just been watered. I guess. I mean, I just a little old. Just a little old. Um, she she checks the door, it's open, she goes in. There's a parrot in there somewhere.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:15

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:16

Do we ever see that parrot?

SPEAKER_01 1:07:18

It does, it does that when they're talking at some point in their like big final conversation, we do a cutaway to the bird at one point for no reason.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:27

So we do see the bird.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:28

We do one, yeah. I remember seeing one cutaway of the bird.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:31

She looks at her dad pictures, kid pics, she looks at a yearbook. She then MG shows up, Aubrey Plaza, she's changed her face.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:45

Yeah. Angry. Instantly angry.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:50

Yeah. She's just cranky.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:52

Cranky. Um and then just all this information comes out.

The Dad Returns: A Dark Reunion

SPEAKER_01 1:08:00

Which is weird because this isn't what the movie was about. It is now. Right? It is now. I I mean I get that, but at what point did it all of a sudden become like, oh wait, Aubrey Plaza's the bad person?

SPEAKER_00 1:08:14

Wait, we ran out of bad people, so we got to make the well sure.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:17

That's right. We're just kind of killing them off for no reason whatsoever. I it just was very strange. I I just I mean, I didn't see it coming, so kudos to that, but I didn't see it coming because it doesn't make any sense, and I don't care that much. Tough, tough stuff.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:34

Yeah. If she was like looking for a serial killer, but we find out that Aubrey Plaza killed her dad, killed like two prostitutes, couple of hookers, yeah, killed the church girl for random.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:49

Which is confusing because also not really.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:52

And not quite sure how you kill someone, but then let them leave, and then they drive to their death. I uh it doesn't make any sense.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:59

Very nope, sure doesn't.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:00

Very confusing.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:01

I think they maybe said some Dan Goodsell words in there that kind of explained it, but I but even at some point I feel like even the Dan Goodsell line doesn't make enough sense, you know? And we do only do so much.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:13

We do pussy remorse, we do too much bakersfield a couple times, yeah. And then they fight, and Mark Rick Crawley gets stabbed, she does kettle to the face, uh, and then eventually shoots her with her own gun. And we find out that Corin's in the basement tied up to be murdered, also, because I guess somehow sh MG drives home past where she works, and so she's the one that kidnapped her.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:46

I guess that's what they're telling me. Seems pretty loosey-goosey.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:51

Pretty fin. Uh she's there bleeding out. This little bird flies around in the thing, and then she wakes up and she's in the hospital. See who? I don't know. And it's like Don't ask me.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:04

I didn't write this movie.

SPEAKER_00 1:10:05

It's kind of reminiscent of uh the ending of uh uh Science of the Lambs. Oh, sure. That was a tense, horrifying thing.

SPEAKER_02 1:10:17

This was like sure was. This was not.

SPEAKER_00 1:10:20

What?

SPEAKER_02 1:10:21

This was just totally out of left field.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:24

Uh she wakes up, Marty. In fact, it did away with all suspense because you had no idea that any of that was happening, and then they were just like, oh, by the way, this has been happening the whole time. So instead of suspense, we get the opposite.

SPEAKER_00 1:10:37

You're paying attention to the wrong movie. You're right, yeah. Like, what are we talking about right now? Uh she wakes up, Marty's clapping, and then he explains all the people she killed.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:50

Yeah. Okay. Uh also he seems pretty cool about it since it was his co-worker. Very strange. I feel like cops usually don't. I don't know, like a cop murderer would be like a big deal.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:04

You mean they'd probably try and blame Margaret Qually's character as opposed to like saying the cop did anything terrible.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:10

Cops cover for their own, pretty sure. The blue shield, they call it. It's great show. Ums is a show. So blue bloods is a show.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:21

So then later, I guess she gets out, she's driving home, there's the girl on those the Vespa. They like smile at each other.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:28

Who she has seen several times now, but doesn't seem to acknowledge that, right? Am I crazy? I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:36

And they look at each other, I don't know, either they're gonna go have sex.

Forensics Clues That Don’t Add Up

SPEAKER_01 1:11:40

For sure. Yeah, before she takes her airplane, airplane to France again, I guess. I don't know. That's the movie. There you go. What a treat. Great job, everybody. Who reads the script and is like, you need money? I don't think anyone read the script. I think they were I think they pitched it as like a fun lesbian romp trilogy, and someone was just gave them all their money. Take all my money.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:08

The thing about it is the lesbian doesn't even mean anything.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:12

No, sure doesn't. No.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:14

It's like we've moved into this time period where people they don't people don't like sex in movies for the most part.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:22

And so this movie. Except I don't know, man. It's just I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:27

Yeah. It's weird. It's just a weird movie. Go watch it, everybody. You're gonna love it.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:35

Anything else to say about this movie, Tony?

SPEAKER_01 1:12:38

I really I don't. I don't. We covered all four of my notes, you know?

SPEAKER_00 1:12:42

Yeah. I only like when she beat up that guy and when the body guy body got dragged by a car. Thought that was funny. That was funny.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:50

That was like a good little gag. I enjoyed it.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:53

You know, and Chris Evans having to get rid of a body. I want to see that. I want to see this character have to get rid of a body.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:00

Yeah. You know, one of the Oh, I enjoyed it when he called someone pork chop later in the late towards the end of the movie. I don't remember exactly what happened, but I did laugh at that.

SPEAKER_00 1:13:08

Oh, I don't remember that. Okay. Now we're talking about something we want, we liked. I started the movie Clows, K-L-A-U-S, animated movie from about 10 years ago about the history of about the beginning of Santa Claus. Uh ten out of ten.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:29

Wow, really?

SPEAKER_00 1:13:30

Joke, joke, joke, joke, joke, all these jokes. Really? I like what is this? I couldn't believe my because I read a bunch of things where people are all like, they don't make good holiday movies anymore, and then everyone was like, Klaus, watch Klaus. Hey, don't be dumb, watch Klaus.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:47

I've never seen it, I'm gonna have to watch it.

SPEAKER_00 1:13:49

Just watch, watch, you know, you don't have to I didn't watch the whole thing. I haven't had time, I haven't finished watching it yet, but just watch the first 10 minutes, and if you don't say this thing is filled with jokes, filled with animated movie jokes. I'm I'm like, what is happening? This the all right. It makes you you know, like when you see a movie and you're like, oh, people can do it. It's just you know, it's like this movie.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:16

People can do it.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:17

You're like, Where where's the plot? Where's the jokes?

SPEAKER_01 1:14:22

Some people can't do it. Let's let's be clear. Some people can, some people cannot.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:28

It's hard, but when somebody does it right, you're just like, this is it's magic. You're just like, this is magic.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:36

They call it movie magic. It is movie magic. That's a thing.

The Reverend’s Endgame And Collapse

SPEAKER_00 1:14:39

And this is the whole thing, AI people. It's never gonna happen. It might happen, it just won't be good. Let's be fair. I mean, it'll happen. The AI movies will happen. You always watch I watch this one. This guy's like, Oh, it's my proof of concept for something something. And what was it? It was, oh, it's like it's like this is a pig, you know, it's this really gross pig, and and the pig, the pig is like, oh, they're gonna eat me. And there's like the rich guys that are gonna eat the pig person, right?

SPEAKER_02 1:15:14

Sure.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:15

And then we find out that there was evolution where the guys became the pigs, and that, but they're still the guys, and you're like, at one point, he's like, the pig is talking about how he evolved from them, but he's also saying that he is them. And you're just like, what the fuck are you talking about? You have to you have to you have to pick your point of view, and the the point it was a very classic AI thing, is the point of view just diverged. So he was talking about one thing and then he became the other thing, talking about the other, and you're just like, you can't do that in a movie.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:54

What are you talking about? No, I mean for sure not.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:57

If you do, then Aubrey Plaza's character turns out to be the bad guy with no clues that set us up for that at all. Very confusing. Yep. Not good at all. Tony, what uh what did you enjoy this week?

SPEAKER_01 1:16:09

Well, this is I think this is uh Christmas tradition, I think now. Uh I'm just gonna talk about the most underrated Christmas movie of all time. It's called Surviving Christmas. People hate this movie. Ben Affleck, uh Gandalfini. I think you talked about this last week. Uh no, I well, maybe I did. Maybe I did, maybe I didn't. I'll I'll talk about it till I'm blue in the face. Um it's wonderful. I love this movie. We watch it every year on Christmas night. It's our tradition. Christmas Eve or the night of Christmas Day. Christmas night. So the end of the end of Christmas when everyone's like, well, we're tired. We gotta go. It's the last thing we do for the Christmas season. Christina Applegates, and it's it's great. It's funny, it's weird, it's quirky. I love it. People hate this movie. People hate it. Why do they hate this movie? Um, I think because they think it's bad, but it's not as great. It's a great movie. It's very funny. Why do people make a hundred percent sense? No, not really. But it's delightful.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:14

Why do people hate the movie because it's bad?

SPEAKER_01 1:17:17

Yeah, but those people are silly. Those are silly gooses. I love this movie. Ben Affleck himself doesn't like this movie, from I believe he said that in an interview, but uh I love it. You're like, I don't care. Gonna like your movie. He doesn't know. He doesn't get it. I'm gonna like your terrible Christmas movie. It's a Christmas movie, so you know. I'm ready for his new the new trailer for the Rip. That looks pretty good. The rip, I haven't seen that. Very excited. Oh, you haven't seen a trailer for it? It looks good.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:42

Did you watch the trailer for uh uh The Odyssey? No, I haven't.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:48

Does it look good?

SPEAKER_00 1:17:50

It looks terrible I mean it's fat Damon playing like an old-timey guy, and we did that with the Great Wall, and it did not go well.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:57

It didn't go great, that's true.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:59

And and you I guess time will tell. Maybe we'll do it for this show. You and I have a tendency not to enjoy Christopher Nolan's movies, so Oh, yeah, so true.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:08

So true. We haven't seen uh Bomb, Bomb Man, whatever that movie's called.

SPEAKER_00 1:18:14

I mean, I'm sure it's fine. I'm sure it's fine.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:17

I'm not sure it's fine.

Twist Reveal: MG As The Killer

SPEAKER_00 1:18:18

I've said it a million times. I hate biographies, so sure, sure.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:22

Off to a bad start. Okay. All right, Dan. What are we watching next week that is not two hours, you say?

SPEAKER_00 1:18:28

Well, I had a movie that was two and a half hours that we're gonna do at some point, but I just not not not now.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:32

Yeah, that's tough. It's that's hard to start the year with, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 1:18:36

I found a couple of good horror movies that we're gonna have to do.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:39

Oh, love that.

SPEAKER_00 1:18:41

Tarot and Imaginary.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:44

Oh, imaginary, yeah. That was on the list, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:18:47

So we'll do those at some point, you know, maybe in a month or two. But you know, those ones I was like thinking about. And then I found I was doing like the search, you know, worst movies of 2025. Then I found a great search. I I hope this movie's available. I think it is. We'll find out. Oh, I I looked at it. It is, it is available. Um what's his name? Uh who's the guy on TV that plays the big guy that's giant and beefy and that like doesn't have a place that he lives and he's a military guy and he beats people up. Alan.

SPEAKER_02 1:19:18

That was a lot of that was a lot of information.

SPEAKER_00 1:19:20

Richens, Rich, Richie, Richens. Oh Alan Richens, Rich, what's his name?

SPEAKER_01 1:19:26

Rich Richeson. Alan Rich Richeson, Richinson, whatever his weird name is. Uh, I did not, yeah. You described the show perfectly, technically, but I don't know if it was the order you said things in or what, but I was like, what are you talking with Richer? You're talking about Richard. Alan Richison. Richardson. He's great. He's one of the this is him and uh Tubbs, right? Their buddy buddy action. Oh, great. I'm ready for this. Play date on us.

SPEAKER_00 1:19:54

Play date, it's called Play date. I've never heard of I've never heard of this movie.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:00

I I did it I did hear about this and I I don't remember what I think my brother watched it and it was like dude this is the dumbest thing I've ever saw I'm I'm ready let's do this so it's gotta be great is that what you're saying because he loves uh I think it's gonna be really good. I love him. He's great. He's great. Oh yeah Kevin James. Let's see what they can do with that. Kevin James is not great. He's fine though. You know what I mean? He's fine.

SPEAKER_00 1:20:27

The one movie where he plays like the football coach that gets thrown off the New Orleans Saints and has to go to the show. Oh, the Saints, yeah. Whoa!

SPEAKER_01 1:20:34

I don't remember what that was. And then the Saints, the real guy shows up at the end of the movie and is like, good job, me. What a piece of shit movie that was. So we're gonna Oh, the things people do.

SPEAKER_00 1:20:46

We're gonna talk about Play Data movie that came out, and I guess no, no one is a 90s movie that came out.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:52

Pretty under the radar. Yeah. Pretty under the radar. That's great, though. I'm ready for this.

SPEAKER_00 1:20:56

I mean, you used to be able to put movies like this out, and they'd make$70 million,$80 million on a$12 million budget, and everyone's like, Hollywood, Hollywood. Great stuff.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:06

Let's do a sequel. Play date two.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:09

Hollywood can't do can't do this kind of movie anymore.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:12

They did it to themselves. Netflix did it to itself, and now they're buying. I don't I don't know what's gonna happen in the next 10 years, man. It's gonna be weird.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:23

What it's somebody said, what's gonna happen is we gotta we gotta pay for Amazon and then we still get commercials. We're paying to get commercials, and eventually the the stars are gonna make us pay extra to see the movies just because they're in the movies.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:39

Probably, yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:42

How excited are you?

SPEAKER_01 1:21:43

We're dumb enough to do it.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:44

How excited are you for Marty Supreme?

SPEAKER_01 1:21:49

Oh, zero. That's that's the Timothy Chalamet movie, right? Yeah, yeah. No, that's a that's a full zero for me. Um you think it looks good?

SPEAKER_00 1:22:00

No, but okay, I'll just check it. I was telling Shannon about it. She's all like, it's about a ping pong player, yeah. No.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:08

But not even in a cool way, from what I can tell. You know, yeah, forest skump at least was cool.

SPEAKER_00 1:22:14

Got uh playing by himself or whatever. She wouldn't admit that for scump's about a ping pong player.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:21

I mean, I guess it's not about him playing ping pong necessarily, but he definitely is a ping pong player in it, and pretty good one. That's what I said. I love you, Jenny. So I'm waiting, I'm waiting for Marty Supreme lining it up. I'm ready. Yeah, you think that's definitely one for the show. Definitely one for the show. We got a couple of good ones coming out. It's gonna be a good year, 2026, baby.

SPEAKER_00 1:22:48

A few ones, a few good ones left over from 2025 that are cheap enough just yet, but they'll get there.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:53

Not yet, but they will be soon. They will be soon. Luckily, play date streaming for free.

SPEAKER_00 1:22:58

So it's streaming for free on Amazon or someplace, yeah. Yeah, so doing the play date. Okay. I love it. Uh, if you like what we do, uh leave us a thumbs up, subscribe, or leave a comment and tell tell me how how I screwed everything up because I'm Yeah, tell Dan how he screwed up.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:14

Don't tell me.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:15

I'm getting older. I'm getting older.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:17

I'm not gonna learn.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:18

I'm elderly now. Tony's getting to be middle-aged, and I'm elderly.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:21

So I think I'm what is middle age? I think I'm well past middle-aged. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:26

Middle aged is 30, uh, like four 40 is middle-aged.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:29

Well, then I am middle-aged. Yeah, absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:31

How old are you, Tony?

SPEAKER_01 1:23:33

I'm 40. Oh, you're 40. I'll be 41 in May. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:36

So I'm 20 years older than you, Tony.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:39

Senior. We call that 20 years senior. Senior discount.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:43

If you'd had a you getting that discount? No, I think you get it at 64.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:48

6 okay. You're almost there.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:50

I turned 61 in March.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:53

Woo! March is a big year, everybody. March is a big year. Is that what I just said? That's what you just said. March is a big year. March is a big year. 2026 is a good month.

SPEAKER_00 1:24:08

Okay, thanks, everybody. Uh, we'll be back next time talking about Play Day. Play Day. Goodbye, everybody.