Hate Watching with Dan and Tony
Hate Watching with Dan and Tony
Hate Watching Snow White: We Would Rather Eat the Poison Apple
When Disney unveiled its 2025 live-action reimagining of Snow White, audiences expected a thoughtful update of the beloved classic. Instead, we discovered a bewildering misstep that fails at the fundamental elements of storytelling, character development, and musical composition.
Diving deep into this adaptation, we meticulously compare the original animated masterpiece with its modern counterpart, revealing how the remake abandons the narrative clarity and emotional resonance that made the 1937 version timeless. From its opening scene featuring a bloodless childbirth in a pristine carriage to its inexplicable costume changes and nonsensical plot developments, this film consistently makes baffling creative choices.
The musical elements prove particularly disappointing. Unlike successful modern musicals that understand how songs should advance plot and reveal character, Snow White's soundtrack relies on simplistic rhyming without memorable melodies or meaningful lyrics. Even talented vocalists can't elevate material that fundamentally misunderstands what makes movie musicals work. We highlight how the film's approach to color (garish primary hues instead of nuanced fairy tale aesthetics), characterization (telling us Snow White is empowered without showing it), and world-building (inconsistent magic rules) creates a frustrating viewing experience for audiences of any age.
Perhaps most revealing is our analysis of how the film attempts to modernize its message while inadvertently undermining it—Snow White lacks agency despite being described as inspirational, the dwarves are rendered as unsympathetic CGI creations, and the Robin Hood-inspired love interest fails to develop any chemistry or purpose. The original's simple elegance is replaced with complexity that doesn't serve the story or characters.
Have you experienced the disappointment of a cherished classic being poorly reimagined? Share your thoughts in the comments, and join us next week when we tackle Mean Girls: The Musical—hopefully with better results!
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Did you look up who wrote any of these songs?
Speaker 2:No, did you no? I didn't, Because I did write. I did a quick Google search for why does the music suck in Snow White? And there wasn't really a definitive answer, but it was just. The AI was like yes, it's generally regarded as bad. Okay, cool, that makes sense. Ai is so helpful now. It's really nice.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's bad. You're right, human.
Speaker 2:You nailed it.
Speaker 1:There's a consistency among the humans to say, yeah, it's bad. Hey, watch it With Dan and Tony.
Speaker 2:Hey, watch it With Dan and Tony.
Speaker 1:It's like watching. Yeah, Welcome to Hate. Watch what Welcome to no nothing go, welcome. Welcome to Hate Watching with Dan and Tony. I'm Dan, I'm Tony. This is the show where we dare To look at the occasional children's entertainment and tear it to shreds. Dan was so mad when at the occasional children's entertainment and tear it to shreds.
Speaker 2:Dan was so mad when I picked a children's movie. It's against his rules. Dan has three rules, and that's one of them. I have a lot of rules, that's true. I just don't write them all down, so I only got three memorized.
Speaker 1:We don't do a lot of kids' movies just because you know we are adults and adults putting themselves in the kids space and demanding the kids space. Entertainment is for them it's becoming a problematic thing.
Speaker 2:That's true, that is true, I mean, but then you get movies like Blank Check and it's perfect. So I don't know.
Speaker 1:There it is, you know. So this week Tony picked a movie to piss me off.
Speaker 2:Almost specifically. Yeah, because I brought it. When it came out in theaters, you were like we're never doing that movie. And then, as soon as it came out, I was like we're going to do the movie, I don't care. Dan.
Speaker 1:And I have to say I take it back, man. This was a very good kids-ish movie to look at to see what goes on.
Speaker 2:What's wrong with the generation of kids? Because if they enjoyed this?
Speaker 1:they got problems. I can't imagine a child enjoying anything about this movie. Oh no, I don't think so.
Speaker 2:No, this is a horrifying movie. What is the movie Tony? Oh yes, this is 2025, horrifying, horrifying movie. What is the movie Tony? Oh yes, this is 2025's Snow White Classic reinvented, and it's a new classic.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so it's live action version of Snow White.
Speaker 2:I think it was a development For a lot of it.
Speaker 1:It was a development hell for a long time. I think right.
Speaker 2:Sure, yes, yeah, yeah. Did you do any homework? I didn't do any homework.
Speaker 1:Well, my homework was. I watched most of the original Snow White this morning, oh wow.
Speaker 2:That's actually great, because I had a lot of questions, because I have not seen that movie since I was a child and I kept thinking to myself I don't think this is what it was about. No, it's not Okay. I kept thinking to myself I don't think this is what it was about. No, it's not Okay.
Speaker 1:Can you?
Speaker 2:break it down for us.
Speaker 1:Let me bullet point the real Snow White yeah let's do the cliff notes. We open. The evil queen is Snow White's stepmother Right.
Speaker 2:She keeps.
Speaker 1:Snow White down cleaning the stairs, surrounded by animals that are cool, and she wants to be the fairest of them all and she knows at some point Snow White's going to become a problem. Snow White's sitting there. Oh, we do a wishing well thing, snow White's. I'm wishing we didn't do that in this one, that's probably fine. The sound reverberates in the wishing well goes over the wall. Local prince riding by is like who is that? I am in love.
Speaker 2:Oh, just by the voice, I get it, just by the voice.
Speaker 1:He climbs the fence and is like I'm in love with you. Okay, so here we are. We're all set. She's a domestic, he's a prince. He, we're all set. She's a domestic, he's a prince. He's the one that's going to do the work. Perfect Things change. She becomes she's too fair. So the mirror tells the evil queen that she's too fair. So she has the huntsman take her out into the woods to kill her. The huntsman can't do it. He says run away. She runs away into the forest. Everything is spooky there. And then, as dawn comes up, we realize everything that she thought was spooky was really just the animals. They come up there, she charms the animals. She goes to where the dwarves are. No, she goes. They take her to the dwarves house.
Speaker 2:She cleans oh, the animals lead her. Oh, okay, the animals lead her.
Speaker 1:She cleans the entire dwarves house. She cleaned the animals leader. Oh the animals leader.
Speaker 2:She cleans the entire dwarves house.
Speaker 1:Okay, Cut to the dwarves. They're working in the mine. We big dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig. Um, okay, they leave to and sing. Hi-ho, it's off to work, we go.
Speaker 2:That can't make any sense.
Speaker 1:Doesn't make any sense.
Speaker 2:That's the wrong time of day. That's the morning song, guys.
Speaker 1:I have the feeling they must have cut one where they walk to work singing the song.
Speaker 2:But then they couldn't sort of get it in there. Yeah, too many walking scenes.
Speaker 1:We got to cut it down, so they get home. Who's the angry dwarf? Angry dwarf, grumpy, grumpy, not nearly as grumpy and horrible in this thing, you know.
Speaker 2:Sure.
Speaker 1:In the new one. He's so horrible You're just like please someone kill him.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he's a piece of trash.
Speaker 1:They're like how can we get more attention in this? Well, let's make the angry one really fucking angry, just like really, really 2025 angry, but he's, he's got problems yeah, so they take her back there. You know, through machinations they decide to all get along.
Speaker 2:They're like okay, uh, it's very nice of them wicked queen figures out.
Speaker 1:She asked the magic mirror. Mirror it's like oh yeah, snow white's, you know, at the dwarves cottage, she goes. So magic mirror and the mirror's like oh yeah, snow White's, you know, at the dwarves' cottage, she goes-.
Speaker 2:So he doesn't have the rule where he can only answer one question Did they do that in this movie.
Speaker 1:I don't remember that.
Speaker 2:Yes, there was a line where it was like he's only able to answer one question. Who is the fairest? I was like why does he have that limitation? But sorry, continue.
Speaker 1:Wow, that's a useless magic mirror. So she works up the apple, goes there while the dwarves are off at work, gets Snow White. Snow White passes out. The dwarves love her too much, so they don't bury her. Instead, they make her a glass.
Speaker 2:Yeah, a glass tube, right, Wait, hold on. Let me think Wait Okay. Sorry, I missed it. Oh right, Wait, hold on. Let me think, wait Okay sorry I missed it.
Speaker 1:Oh wait, hold on. Okay, so the Wicked Queen is in there. They get the animal alert, right, is that?
Speaker 2:similar to an Amber alert.
Speaker 1:Remember when the animals alerted them and they came running on things.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, I remember. So they're rushing home, I remember.
Speaker 1:So they, they're rushing home, they, I think they find her. I was fast forwarding at this part so I missed maybe they, they find her dead and so they're pissed off. They chase down the witch, the queen, chase her oh, that's better. Up into the mountains in the rain she's gonna. She's trying to do a rock to, to crush them all to death with a rock. Oh, oh, my God, lightning strikes. The precipice she is on falls, of course the rock falls behind her. So basically, she falls to her death. The dwarves kill the evil, snow White falls.
Speaker 2:I kind of love that actually. But yeah, great, Continue.
Speaker 1:Because that's the thing is, the queen's about to poison her and they're rushing home. They get home too late and then they kill the. They kill the queen. Wow, it seems like a thing, john wick style revenge, yes, as opposed to her breaking a mirror and dying um it's melting my face off it's glass that that doesn't make any sense Continue.
Speaker 1:We sort of have a montage and we get some pages. They encase her in crystal and then the prince, who's been looking for her all this time, comes and kisses her, just finds her. She wakes up, just eventually finds her.
Speaker 2:He's riding that horse back and forth with a search party. He finds her eventually.
Speaker 1:And everything's good.
Speaker 2:She goes and visits Princess. So she dies for a while. In that one it's like maybe days I was hoping it was like years.
Speaker 1:I was hoping they were going to say years, which is cool.
Speaker 2:Because Sleepy Beauty, she's in the castle for years.
Speaker 1:I believe, yeah, a long, long time, long time, yeah Long time, yeah, long, long time.
Speaker 2:Long time, yeah, long time. So Okay, yes, it's different, it's a little different.
Speaker 1:It's samey but different. No, it's completely different because she is, she's a full domestic, she has a, she has a small amount of agency. But I'm going to argue Sure, does what's her name? Really have any agency? I don't know.
Speaker 2:I don't know either. I don't really know what this movie is about. To be honest, it didn't feel like there was much of a plot.
Speaker 1:I mean I kind of wish it had gone more Well. First of all, her, her costume. Talk about her costume, donnie.
Speaker 2:I want to well, first of all. I want to well, first of all. I want to talk about everyone's costumes in the fact that they don't get dirty at all.
Speaker 2:First of all they are all fresh out of the package from target or wherever. They got these stupid clothes that are way too colorful or way too clean for anything that's going on there. But then she just so she's got like, um, what I'll call poor people clothes in the beginning, right, but then she's like I'm going to go pick apples, and then she's got this not poor people dress and I'm like where did she get that? Because the queen's not giving her new clothes, no. So where did she get this nice little, you know snow white dress all of a sudden? That should just probably be her clothes all the time, and maybe she throws over a little jacket when she goes apple picking. I don't know, it's weird, but they all look really cheap.
Speaker 1:Is that just me? The big yellow tool? You know that's called tool. And then the other thing her dress is like, I won't say it's modest, but it's not bright yellow. They're not murderous colors, it's really not. They're not murderous colors, it's. Yeah, it's really. They're evocative colors. You know it's that when, when disney was making this, he was looking at like these, these, uh, european painters that were like, you know that did these beautiful fairy tale paintings that were gorgeous and, yeah, you know lots of browns and reds and you know they were not just like primary colors. This thing just wants to sort of barf primary colors on you at all times, yeah, yeah it's weird, terrible Ugly.
Speaker 1:And so they sort of want to make her a girl boss, but she's so not a girl boss.
Speaker 2:Well, I mean almost literally, you know what I mean Just because she doesn't really. She just kind of is like, okay, I'll just clean, it's cool. And then she's just kind of like yeah, no, it's fine. Hey, everyone get along. Hey, come on, guy, she doesn't really do anything. Yeah, like there's no boss nature to anything she does or says or acts. But they do kind of say like, oh, wow, you're a bad-ass. And that's confusing to me. I don't know, but you know, in their defense I say that about myself too. You know, sometimes in the mirror in the morning I'm like, hey, you're a badass, you got this. But we all know it's not true. So sometimes you just say it to kind of inflate your own ego.
Speaker 1:And we're going to talk about the rogue Jarnathan.
Speaker 2:Is that the prince guy Jarnathan's from Dungeons and Dragons, which I love? But I was like, who is Jonathan in this film? But that must be, that's Robin Hood's name.
Speaker 1:Yeah, the thief, yeah sure.
Speaker 2:It's clad in green. Come on guys. What are we doing here?
Speaker 1:Was he really wearing green?
Speaker 2:He was like all green for the whole movie and I was like he's just Robin Hood, but less cool.
Speaker 1:He was, there was nothing positive. Was there anything positive about him through the movie? Had really nice hair I'm very jealous of his hair as a bald man I just looked at that. The hair just mesmerized me. It was everything else what do you say?
Speaker 2:volumous? Like it had a nice curve to the, to the it was. I mean he's got nice head of hair. He's probably going to lose it. Voluminous.
Speaker 1:Voluminous. Now could he act? No.
Speaker 2:I and I was also debating if he could sing and I. There are times where I was like, oh, he can sing. But it did feel like sometimes when he's doing like the you know those like the spoken word parts of the song, it felt like he was putting on some sort of affectation, like it didn't sound like his normal voice, because when he talks it's you know, he talks kind of deep, and then he's when he talks in the song, he's like. It was really weird and I was like is this guy not talented? But then when he hits the high notes you're like oh no, he's got a voice, he's got a vocal range. So there was something weird in the booth where I think someone was like try it this way. And then he did it and they were like that's it and it wasn't it.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean. Now, was there any point in this movie where the singing got you emotional?
Speaker 2:No, Well, I mean part of the problem is the songs are terrible.
Speaker 1:Yes, I know the songs are terrible. I'm just like a person, how they sing with inflection and you know, bringing up certain words can make you emotional. Like if you're a really good singer, you're going like, okay, you're getting me, you know, and I mean okay. So before we started I was like I have to listen to some music that I know is good. In a musical that has come out in the last five years, yeah, I caught you mid-listen Continue.
Speaker 1:So I brought up Ripple from Spirited, sung by Will Ferrell Right. This song was cut from the movie.
Speaker 2:The main movie.
Speaker 1:In my opinion, one of the greatest movie, musical songs ever, which is why they kept it for the record. They put it in the credits.
Speaker 2:So that you can see because they agree they're like man. This song is really good. Doesn't really fit in the movie, but this song is incredible.
Speaker 1:Yes, incredible. Well, and the way he tries to start it and then it gets cut. I mean it's beautiful. If you want to watch a musical, go watch Spirited, because will ferrell 10 times better singer than anyone in this movie, well, except for gal gadot, I mean.
Speaker 2:Boy, is she a treasure?
Speaker 1:sorry, that was probably meaner than it needed to be it's very cruel, tony, very, very cruel, um, and that's not to say if you put these people in a real musical where someone is directing them musically and there's actual stakes and somebody wrote a good song, maybe, maybe with a catchy tune, some clever lyrics, anything, anything at all. Tony, the lyrics just constantly are rhyming in this movie so they're good.
Speaker 2:That's not what makes it good. I'm pretty sure I took a music theory class one time in college and I don't think that was on the curriculum.
Speaker 1:I counted a lot of rhymes. They rhymed a lot of words, a lot of word rhyming.
Speaker 2:Now, on the scale of buster rhymes, are we at a full buster?
Speaker 1:Could be. And then the other thing I did I think I watched the first 30 minutes of this movie and then I was like, okay, I, I, I wonder if kids movies can be good. And so I was like I'll put on Frozen, right, I've seen it, oh yeah. I've seen it maybe one time, uh and and enjoyed it, you know, just never you know just once I just never really went back to it.
Speaker 1:Watch, like the first 20 minutes of Frozen. The intro song does not have any. I mean it has Sven and the reindeer, doesn't have the girls. No, girls in the first song, yeah, they're cutting ice out of a lake, right. Doesn't really even have that much to do with the plot or anything else, but what they do is they give us a good song right at the beginning.
Speaker 2:Right, they give us good song that's how you draw people in, right? You're like, oh, this is catchy. What's going on here? Let's watch the rest of the movie. What?
Speaker 1:what world is this? Oh, I'm not gonna sit there going like, well, this better all tie into how she became, who she became, no, doesn't matter. And then we go through the two girls and the one girl's locked off from the other girl, and we're just like, okay, this is a plot, this is a movie, these are characters. I'm interested in all these characters they delineated. You know that they're both going, everybody's going through an actual thing.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but I mean that's hard. You know that's so hard to write something like that where everyone's going through something. You know it's just a lot to remember.
Speaker 1:Should we have one person going through something?
Speaker 2:Let's start with that. No, because if you're going to do one, you got to do them all. You know you can't have different levels of characters. So you just got to decide. You got to be like is everyone going to be a real character, or Like is everyone going to be a real character or is no one going to be a real character. And that's the easy way out they chose the no one.
Speaker 1:Oh my God. So we start with the book. Hedgehog opens it. Once upon a time, the parents wished for a kid. Then, on a snowy night, they had a kid in a carriage and they called her Snow White.
Speaker 2:I'm already confused, dan. So now are they saying that this child was born in the carriage yes, bloodless, because the baby is like. Thanks.
Speaker 1:Tony.
Speaker 2:Bloodless Sorry, it's the whole place is Christine Jesus.
Speaker 1:They just had a baby in there. I need to see some afterbirth in that.
Speaker 2:I mean, I don't need to see it, but it's a weird this is. Let me ask you a question.
Speaker 1:Let me ask you let me come at it a different way. That's, was I needing to see afterbirth at the beginning?
Speaker 2:no, tony I, I was able to see the placenta, dan, because no, this is not what I'm asking. Hold on, why was she? Why was she named snow white in the original movie? It wasn't because she was born in a blizzard, right.
Speaker 1:You know, that's the one thing I didn't research was the actual fairy tale. I am assuming she is Snow White because she has the whitest skin.
Speaker 2:Yeah, she's just super white and back in the day that was like a good thing, which is a whole other weird thing we don't need to talk about. But so this is a weird. I understand you have to change that because you can't be like, well, she's snow white, because she's super white and that's why she's the fairest in the land. Not, okay, I get that, but making the choice to being like, well, she's born in a blizzard, in a carriage, with no doctors and nothing around, and now we call her snow white because there's snow everywhere. That's dumb, that doesn't make any sense. So this movie starts with me being like what's going on? Why is she born in this carriage? And now he's just holding her and everyone's fine and there's no blood and everything. Like how long would it take to sterilize this carriage after a birth?
Speaker 1:that's what I'm asking okay, they're rich, right, they're the, they're the king and queen, which is another thing, is like just setting up that, that they're the king and the. You know like I don't know man, the kids get a lot of propaganda and shit and just the idea that this king and this queen rule over all these people and like, well, we live in this giant castle, all three of us, and you live in your hovels down there. I know you dance and sing, but we're best friends.
Speaker 2:It's weird. The dynamic is weird. I'm just saying maybe she's born in the castle and there's still a snowstorm outside. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:Well, in two of the songs they really talk about the struggle and how she had to girl boss it to get born in the snow. They do that in two of the songs.
Speaker 2:So she did it. She born in the snow. They do that in two of the songs, so she did it. She's in the womb and she's like it's snow. I better come out now. It's weird. When we get to one of the lines, because I'm 90% sure I wrote down one of the lines because it was just like it was just absurd because they make it like this.
Speaker 1:Her being born was like the beginning of my showing that I'm a plucky kid.
Speaker 2:When I clawed my way out of the vagina. Yeah, got it.
Speaker 1:I clawed my way out of the vagina. Okay, so she's going to. Her plan is to rule with love and yes.
Speaker 2:Because of the locket that she received. Right? That's what truth. Oh yeah, I don't think we got the weird locket.
Speaker 1:But now we go to the town and everyone sings and dances because everyone's happy being under a king and queen and that's great.
Speaker 2:I understand that they're going for a visual separation here, but everyone in this scene is clad in vibrant colors, of course. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. And then when later everyone is sad, they're all in drab, peasant clothes. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. And my thing is they've gotten poorer, right, that's the whole thing. Like they've gotten poorer. Things are bad, but they bought new, worse clothes. That's not what poor people do. If anything, they'd be wearing the same clothes. They would just be dirty and ratty. Now, right.
Speaker 1:See, but that would show an evolution of something happening.
Speaker 2:Well, I think that's what I'm saying is that maybe we should have shown something you know because it's weird to me that everyone bought a new wardrobe and they all shopped at the same store. So we got one store and that store is like well, now we need poor people clothes because everyone's upset, it's the vibe of 2025.
Speaker 1:And then in the final scene they're all wearing white. So there should have been like a bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach, bleach. It's like this weird thing where she sees another girl and the queen dies and then this enchanted Well she did.
Speaker 2:She saw another girl and she gave her her crown, her tiara. Is that what happened? Don't remember. That doesn't make any sense. That's not even a good thing. That's expensive. You can't just give that away to people.
Speaker 1:She cares. She gives stuff to the poor.
Speaker 2:Yeah, she's not going to be a good ruler. Sorry, that's not how you rule.
Speaker 1:This enchanting woman shows up and I wrote I'd hit that.
Speaker 2:So, listen, we shouldn't get too far into it, but they probably shouldn't have gotten someone quite as attractive to play the queen you got to.
Speaker 1:Well, she's going to be the fairest got to.
Speaker 2:Well, it's gonna be the first to be right. But then they're like actually snow white's fair, and and immediately you're like well, no oh, I know you're not she's definitely not.
Speaker 2:So this mirror is lying because I think he has a vendetta against the queen and wants her to like off herself. That's what my, my general vibe is. This mirror is lying to her because he's like you've kept me captive for 50 years, asking me the same freaking question over and over, and I hate you in the real snow white the final time that she goes in and talks to the mirror.
Speaker 1:The mirror says she's better than you, she's fairer than you, because purity comes, fairness comes from inside.
Speaker 2:They say something to that nature in this movie at the end, where the mirror says some sort of rhyme about its beauties from the inside and I was like, but if that's true, she never would have been the fairest of all. Like there's no point in time where the queen whatever the stepmother queen is ever the nicest person in the world. Everyone is nicer than her. So she's at the bottom of the inside fair scale. So it's weird, it just doesn't make any sense.
Speaker 1:Stop, tony, stop, just let it.
Speaker 2:I'm sorry, I shouldn't, I shouldn't dissect it. Let the magic play out, so she comes in she's hot, the king marries her immediately Again as a rebound. You can't pass that up.
Speaker 2:And then the king goes to war. Well, from what I understand, gal was like hey, you got to go to war. And he's like cool, I'll do whatever you tell me to. You're smoking hot, I'm out of here. I'll do whatever you tell me to. You're smoking hot, I'm out of here, I'll be back. And he's not back. He's dead, probably. Definitely Right, he died.
Speaker 1:Well, they kind of don't you know, because the rebels in the woods are like, we're still fighting for him.
Speaker 2:Like Robin Hood, because that was all you Like Robin Hood.
Speaker 1:Robin Hood is what's-his-name went over to France to be in the Crusades and shit, and then he came back.
Speaker 2:Man, I just want to go watch Kevin Costner's Prince of Thieves now. I don't Great film.
Speaker 1:And then she turns all the farmers into soldiers, except the people that she doesn't turn into soldiers, who stay farmers.
Speaker 2:Well, a lot of them are, you know, overweight or ugly. You don't want those people around.
Speaker 1:And they make Snow White cut her hair and become a servant. Okay, girl servant.
Speaker 2:Now the haircutting.
Speaker 1:What People didn't like short hair back then.
Speaker 2:Oh okay, Kind of like I feel now, and you feel the opposite. Dan loves like short hair back then. Oh okay, Kind of like I feel now and you feel the opposite.
Speaker 1:Dan loves his short hair. Shannon's like you're going to lose that hair someday. I'm like, yeah, baby, it's never happening.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't know. I mean, not everybody loses their hair and you've gone past the time where you're supposed to lose it. Dan's all right. Yeah, I don't know. Knock on wood, I think.
Speaker 1:Pretty amazing Kids.
Speaker 2:I'm pretty so first of all, let's just pump the brakes. People that lose their hair aren't any less amazing than people that have their hair. Okay, we're all good people? I don't know, probably not. We're cursed. God doesn't love us.
Speaker 1:God doesn't love you. The kids sing their sadness. I don't remember what that was.
Speaker 2:I don't know, but I'm sure they did it well Years past.
Speaker 1:She grows up. Who's in the kitchen? It's a sexy thief who's stealing potatoes. And then she's like we kind of play the bit where he's like who are you? You're a scullery maid. And she's like oh, yeah, there know there's Snow White out there somewhere. You know, we do like sort of that which they don't do very well and they don't doesn't mean anything?
Speaker 2:No, they don't. It doesn't make any sense. Yeah, so then that reveal later, when he finds out that she's Snow White, means nothing.
Speaker 1:It's very dull.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:She's out there talking to the animals and then she's trying to decide if she should speak up about the thief there at dinner, and then she tries to lecture the queen about sharing and how, if you make a pie for the people, I don't know.
Speaker 2:This. This is how are you underselling this? This is, I believe, my favorite line of the entire movie. Okay, what, what is it? So the queen starts yelling at snow white about how, like, giving them everything is bad right, and she literally says this is a direct quote. Yeah, the queen is yelling at so and she what? Will you tell them that you've made them dessert? And it's the greatest line in cinema history. It's almost. It's as if someone watched.
Speaker 2:Zoolander and they were like remember when Ben Stiller's like you made a center for ants? But what if we made that real, just as dumb, but we put it in a real movie and just let her say what are you going to tell them? You made them dessert pies? I don't think so. No one wants a pie. I don't understand what they're talking about here. Dan, I would love a pie. If someone came to my door and was like, guess what? I made you dessert. I'd be like I will serve you faithfully till the end of time. My lord, please give me this pie. It's actually a great move. I don't understand what we're talking about here. Why is she like pie's a dumb idea, pie's a great idea.
Speaker 1:But she's money obsessed. She's not food obsessed, money obsessed, I guess.
Speaker 2:So weird.
Speaker 1:And then we bring in the thief, and then he says in the thief. And then they, I think he says I'm the bandit lord of the forest yeah, he just yeah.
Speaker 2:He just offers up some information that we've never even heard before.
Speaker 1:Seems a little weird so they throw him in the dungeon. Not fair. And then you know it's no white's all like my dad would show him mercy. Then we get a song.
Speaker 2:Well, hold on. Then she was like okay, well, instead of the dungeon, let's string him up outside. Strip him down and string him up outside.
Speaker 1:Well, tie him to the gates, right tie him to the gates With a very thin rope that's very easy to untie, and just one rope, it's just one.
Speaker 2:He could easily untie that without a doubt. He could have done that himself. He's just making a point, oh, yeah, I wrote that.
Speaker 1:Tie him to the gate. Okay, we have a song Dreaming all alone, waiting on a wish the girl I'm meant to be. So this is about her dreams and then it's about who she wants to be. Does she want to be a girl boss? What does she want to be? This is her big first song, really, and it should be setting up what she wants.
Speaker 2:Well, she wants to not clean anymore, I believe. Except for that, she cleans a little later as well, I don't know and also like she's basically a house cleaner right what do we call that Maid? But again, her clothes are very clean. She's like scrubbing the floors and she's in a pristine clean. She's never knelt down before in her life. There's no dirt on her knees. It's weird.
Speaker 1:In the original. Her skirt is kind of gray and it has a couple of patches on it where she's sewn patches.
Speaker 2:Right, because you've got to kneel down. You're rubbing the fabric. We all know what happens when you're on your knees cleaning stuff. You know it's weird.
Speaker 1:So she sees the guy tied up and she just unties him very easily.
Speaker 2:So easily. And nobody's watching him, there's no. They just like tied him up gently and we're like all right, just do your thing, guy, because we're leaving.
Speaker 1:So she just walks up and just one little knot, one little shoelace, he easily runs away. There's no tension, there's nothing, there's no. She gives him a little piece of bread, oh she did give him a piece of bread.
Speaker 2:Yeah Right, see, she knows food. Food is the way to the people's hearts.
Speaker 1:Now I mean, he's Robin Hood. Robin Hood didn't break into the castle and steal potatoes.
Speaker 2:No, no, no, First of all, that's a dumb move. You don't go into the lion's den.
Speaker 1:The only time Robin Hood went in there was to see Maid Marian. He did not. He would always ambush people on the road. He's a horn dog.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because that's what you do when there's less people around and you can control the environment. That strategy right. They're coming down the road, you circle them up. Boom, I'm hanging from a tree. I dropped out. This is again the Kevin Costner movie. Now I'm hanging from a tree, I dropped down and I'm like I'm taking your goods, my friend, I'm Kevin Costner Badass, he controls the situation.
Speaker 1:Yeah, he's smart, smart.
Speaker 2:I don't just walk into a heavily guarded castle and take potatoes Bad idea.
Speaker 1:The queen is pissed. The mayor tells her that Snow White is fair. Okay, boom, Things have changed based on nothing you know. It should have been her act of compassion of letting the thief go.
Speaker 2:should have been something, and that should have been very specific. And it's like, oh, she's blossoming, oh, now she's fair, yeah it should have been.
Speaker 1:This is my time to take an action. Now I'm going to do something with my life. No longer will I be in the back Shun.
Speaker 2:Yeah, great you got to rhyme, because the most important thing is rhyming. You got to remember that.
Speaker 1:But yeah, she should have. This, should have. It should have been. This was what should have happened is she should have finked out the dude, right, right, what you know like told the queen. She said finked out, finked, you know, to fink, you know like told the queen.
Speaker 2:Did you say finked out, finked, you know to fink, you know what the word to fink, to fink on someone I've never heard. Are you saying stink, but with a?
Speaker 1:lisp F, f-i-n-k. Finked. When you fink on someone, you tell on them. So she goes and finks to the queen. It's like, oh, this potatoes, that the queen comes down there and ties in the thing. And then she, okay, can I call it like a tattletale, like a finkster you're a finkster because I like that word. Okay, great, um see, so she should have done something wrong. Right, and then has a song about how I need to do the right thing. A little redemption yes, I need to.
Speaker 1:I need to you know be more, more like my dad, who always did the good things, even though he was the king and he oppressed everyone, whatever.
Speaker 2:Apparently not. Okay, don't just put words in their mouths. They were all very happy. They were wearing colorful clothes, they were dancing around, no one's impressed.
Speaker 1:We should have started the movie with the queen bringing pies to the party.
Speaker 2:What are you going to tell them? You brought them dessert. Yeah, man, dessert. People love dessert.
Speaker 1:And then what she should have done is she should have snuck out there, not let the rebel dude know that it was her. She has a knife, she cuts the ropes and he's like you know, she's got like a thing on.
Speaker 2:He says A hood yeah Jasmine, she's Jasmine in this moment Think you poor scullery maid.
Speaker 1:He doesn't know. It's Snow White, right? So he gets freed and he's like I was freed by it. You know, he thinks Snow White faked on him. Then he thinks scullery maid, let him go. He has these two people and then, you know, when he finally integrates those two together, he's like what's happening in my?
Speaker 2:brain Blown. Yeah Great, this is great.
Speaker 1:Also, he has to be a bad boy, right.
Speaker 2:Or he's a, is he not, I think? He tells people he is he's the most not bad boy ever. But he has a whole song, a whole song. He's got like a few lines in a song where he's like you're finally doing it, Jonathan, You're on the right side of things, or something stupid like that. He's a bad boy.
Speaker 1:She has to go back and forth or he has to go back and forth. He has to actually be bad and he has to maybe put a knife to Snow White's throat and say take me to the treasure room.
Speaker 2:Very sexy, sexy, he's dominating her with a knife um they go hold on.
Speaker 1:That's not what was sexy jesus okay, whatever, but one of these characters has to actually go through a thing sure, yeah, an evolution of some sort, yeah so the huntsman is tasked. It takes no white to the thing. He takes her out there she's picking apples. He pulls the knife. She says why? And then he's all like I gotta do it flee. She flees. There's an owl, there's an evil tree. She falls down into a lake.
Speaker 2:Now here's Okay, I'm confused, Dan right, so she's running through the evil Dead forest right.
Speaker 2:With trees that are groping her and everything is scary. Now she falls through the earth into a different forest. Yes, why are there two floors of forest? How does this work in a world? I'm confused on what's happening. I don't understand. I'm very confused. She fell through, landed in some water and now she's in a new forest that's also dark, but then all of a sudden, not dark. It's symbolic? I don't think it's symbols, it's just dumb. It doesn't make any sense.
Speaker 1:She wakes up, there's the bunnies Day. Later she goes to the cabin. Hello, there's no one there. Boom, hi-ho, hi-ho. It's off to the work. We go. We see the dwarves walking to work. This time they go to work Hi-ho. Then they have magic hands.
Speaker 2:That E-T or something. Okay, so this was my next question. They do so. This is not from the original. They don't have glowing red hands that light up the minerals in the rocks, you know? Okay, because I was like this is a weird choice, but I guess you know the 30s were a weird time I don't I don't know why they have magic hands now? Why don't they use their magic hands later? Why does the magic hands never come back?
Speaker 1:I think Doc uses the magic hands to fix the rogue dude Jonathan.
Speaker 2:The arrow. You think he magic hands the arrow wound Okay.
Speaker 1:I don't know, does he reach in?
Speaker 2:there with his magic hand and massage it all better, okay.
Speaker 1:I'm not a doctor, my name's Doc, but I'm a doctor of mineral science. And then he's like but I guess I could try mineral science on the dude, On the dude.
Speaker 2:Yeah, like I'll just what does that mean? Like when do you have to bring a rock back to life? I don't understand what's happening to life. I don't understand what's happening. And then he thinks he's dead. The doc comes out and he's like yeah, he died, guys, I'm sorry he's dead. And then he walks out and he's like I thought you were dead. What's happening?
Speaker 1:Okay, we're too far ahead. That happens later.
Speaker 2:Well, you got me all started. I'm all riled up about it.
Speaker 1:They get home, she's sleeping, they all run away, except Dopey. Then they attack and then she stays. Okay, now we're here to Tony's favorite song, the Evil Queen song about no, mr Nice Guy, mrs Crown.
Speaker 2:Beauty Equals Power. You wrote down some of these words.
Speaker 1:I called this the Lots of Rhymes song. Not that they don't all have lots of rhymes, but this called this the lots of rhymes song. Not that they don't all have lots of rhymes, but this one had a lot of rhymes.
Speaker 2:This one had almost all rhymes. It was almost exclusively rhyming, because it's a terrible song written by a person that can't write songs or lyrics and then performed by Gal, which is listen. She's doing her best. You know, here's what I will say, just in listen. She's doing her best. Here's what I will say just in general. I think she tried really hard.
Speaker 1:And I would like to commend her for that. I did not necessarily feel like her songs were any worse than the rest of them, maybe a little.
Speaker 2:Maybe a little worse, maybe a little worse A little, but not to the point where you're like, well, Rachel can sing like an angel, Gal can't keep up. It was just kind of like, well, all these songs are relatively bad and so good for her. I just want to put that out there. And she's doing a character in the movie. She's trying something. I don't think she succeeds, but she's trying and I appreciate it and good for her for going for it. I appreciate that. Any for her for going for it. I appreciate that. Anyhow, her song's not great, but it's not her fault is what I'm saying In a movie where I was pretty sure it was going to be her fault. It's not her fault. It's not her fault.
Speaker 1:She's not in the movie much really.
Speaker 2:Well, that's also true, yeah.
Speaker 1:Even when she comes in, you're not like okay, here we go. True yeah, even when she comes in, you're not like okay, here we go.
Speaker 2:You're like you don't drag the movie down at all, which is kind of what the reviewers seemed. When you were just reading stuff about it. Everyone was like, well, gal, kind of sucks, and I don't know. I don't think she's much worse than the movie. I'm sorry.
Speaker 1:I'd say the dude is worse than her. Everything he does is worse than her. He's very dull. He's not sexy. No, no, we go back to the. We do some interaction with the dwarves. We find out Dopey can't talk, Dopey hardest to look at of all the dwarves.
Speaker 2:Well, does he remind you of the kid from Polar Express?
Speaker 1:That mixed with.
Speaker 2:Alfred E Newman.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's just like this, you say it. These are not two places you want, you don't want Polar Express.
Speaker 2:That horrible, that's great.
Speaker 1:I've never seen Polar Express, just you know images.
Speaker 2:But you know, dan, are you kidding? Well, all right. Well, we found out our Christmas movie this year.
Speaker 1:My God, it's painful right.
Speaker 2:it's horrifying yeah, it's pretty bad so dopey can't talk.
Speaker 1:Dopey gets food on his head. Snow white follows out when he flees right.
Speaker 2:so he, I'm I'm a little confused about this situation. So there's a moment where they're like well, he's dopey, that's why he can't talk. And someone's like no, he him not talking has nothing to do with him being dopey, but I'm grumpy, and I'm grumpy and I'm sleepy and I'm sleep. You know, there was like a really weird exchange where they were almost trying to say he's not dopey, but he is dopey, but he can't talk because he's dopey. And then they proceed to bully him and I was like what message are we trying to send here? This is very strange. We got a guy that can't talk and is dopey, and we're bullying him and making him cry in front of our new friend. It was very weird.
Speaker 1:It's because we're trying to see his arc, the dopey arc.
Speaker 2:Yeah, well, he talks later. That's his arc.
Speaker 1:He's too scared to speak, so she teaches him to whistle his whistling. Then they go inside and he whistles and calms down all the dwarves and she listens to Grumpy. She gets to Grumpy, finally, and he listens to him and then he's taking it back because he's usually being such a prick that nobody wants to listen to him which he is, by the way he's, so he's like he might be the worst thing in the movie. He. He plays it very well because you really hate him well, okay, he doesn't play anything.
Speaker 2:This is a cgi. All right, this is not a person. Yeah, which? How do you feel about that? By the way, how do you feel about the choice for these to be cgi'd? They're hideous they're hideous.
Speaker 1:They're hideous, they're hard to look at yeah, they're terrible yeah everything in this movie is hard to look at. Maybe the little blue bird is you want. You don't mind looking at the cgi animals I don't think my hedgehog in the beginning. You remember that hedgehog, he was kind of cute the cgi animals are nice, but just their approach to color it just it's like it's shot out of somebody's ass. It's just like it's so bad, you know, and that's you.
Speaker 2:look at the I don't think I ever would have made that correlation, dan, but I appreciate it.
Speaker 1:There's this one artist and he would enema, paint up his ass and then he would spew it out out of his ass on the canvas.
Speaker 2:No, this was not a real person. You're making this up and I'm supposed to be sold paintings for millions of dollars, right? This is the worst thing I've ever heard in my life, Was it you, Dan? Are you talking about yourself in third person again?
Speaker 1:I wish I had gotten on top of that shit. Dan, are you talking about yourself in third person again? I wish I had gotten on top of that shit, literally. Okay, we do the Cleaning Time song and I wrote Rachel can sing, so you can tell that she can sing in this Cleaning.
Speaker 2:Time song. Yeah, for sure yeah.
Speaker 1:Oh, this was the song where the pace of the song was so irritatingly frenetic it started giving me anxiety.
Speaker 2:Oh no.
Speaker 1:I was just like.
Speaker 2:That's not what you want. That's not what you want. That's not how you want to watch Snow White.
Speaker 1:Okay, we find out about the rebels in the forest. We find out that they're a bunch of actors.
Speaker 2:Right, that was almost funny, don't you think?
Speaker 1:If it went anywhere, Well sure.
Speaker 2:I mean, they don't really act ever right Like you set up a thing that they were traveling actors who ran out of money, so they turned to thieving.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:But they never do anything that would be considered. Act like they don't when they break into the castle, maybe they would, you know, put on costumes or act as if they're not the people they are, and then, surprise, they're different people.
Speaker 1:They don't do anything ever you mean, if you, if you're gonna say that a bunch of people are actors, you would actually maybe say that for a reason and then have them do.
Speaker 2:I think I would I think if I was making that joke it would be because later I'm setting up something else that's going to happen. That would be funny, but I guess not.
Speaker 1:So Snow White just wanders off while the dwarves are at work. Ps, she looks white. She doesn't look ethnic Right, she just looks like a white girl.
Speaker 2:Oh sure yeah, right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Okay. She runs into the thief guy. He grabs her and hides her so that the patrol doesn't catch her. Queen wants me dead. Have you seen my dad? I have no idea where he is, but only he's. The only one that could fix anything is her dad, which you're like. Okay, yeah, and well you know. Then we get the song princess problems, famines on the rise. She sings about hope and how you can't fix the world by baking pies which, again, I disagree this was, I thought, the the song that had the most potential princess problems.
Speaker 1:Right, sure you know, like I, he should, he should. This song should be setting up the illusion of what she thinks her princess life is, and then she's telling you what the truth of everyone's life is. Everyone's life is is not great, except jeff bezos, because he got to marry that beautiful woman I have no idea what you're talking about.
Speaker 2:I don't follow, listen, I don't follow the tabloid, so I don't know who's married to who, but you know, I guess, good for him, billionaire, and you don't know who the owner of amazon is no, I know who bezos is. I don't know who he married. Is what I'm saying was it recent hold on.
Speaker 1:I gotta look this up, jeff bezos, you mean wife, the man that just rented out the city of venice for his wedding. Yes, he just got rented out the city of venice?
Speaker 2:no, he didn't. You being, how am I under a rock?
Speaker 1:It only happened. I feel as if maybe I'm hiding under a rock right now. It only happened this weekend.
Speaker 2:Cool. Good for you, dude Looking at I'm looking at it now.
Speaker 1:Yeah, his, his wife is like a plastic surgery nightmare person.
Speaker 2:Yes, that is correct. Yeah, her big humble brag was, I lost 3.5 pounds to fit in the wedding dress, would that? And again, being that maybe when you're skinnier, 3.5 pounds means more. I lose 3.5 pounds between breakfast and lunch. You know what I mean. So to me that's nothing. My weight fluctuates like five to eight pounds a day, so I'd be in and out of dresses all the time.
Speaker 1:But that sounds weird. It's just such a weird brag. Are you sure it's not 3.25 or 3.75?
Speaker 2:Let me know exactly how much you lost. I'll tell you the ounces as well. Oh boy, how many.
Speaker 1:Did he really rent it out a whole city? I don't think he rented out the whole city, but he spent like $50 million or something.
Speaker 2:That's pretty, or more, I don't know. In a terrible, horrible way. I'm just very jealous.
Speaker 1:Okay, so we cut back. We finished the princess problems. Here's Jonathan and the rebels. The rebels are, like you know, oh, mix mix of races and colors. Are like you know, oh, mix mix of races and colors, and it's just like, oh my god.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you're right about that.
Speaker 1:And then they have like a real dwarf.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't know. Listen, I don't want to comment on it, but it felt weird that they were like well, we can't make the dwarves real people.
Speaker 1:I don't know. We'll put a real dwarf in there to make you understand. The dwarves are different than dwarves are different than dwarves, I don't know, I don't know.
Speaker 2:Listen it's a weird thing. I did read that Peter Dinklage was upset. So basically, however, dinklage feels that's how I feel because he's the greatest, we're fully on the Dinklage feels that's how I feel because he's the greatest, we're fully on the dinklage train. He's, he's the goat. Love that guy. So incredible.
Speaker 1:Here come the palace guards with their big attack. They're like sort of running down, like 12 guys running down a hill, and then there's like the who's we don't even know. The kick the head of the guard's name, do we?
Speaker 2:we find out later when she's scolding them all. I don't remember what it is, but she names them and is like you're a bad person now and they're like, oh, I am. So she says his name somewhere in there. Maybe it's like a michael or something like that. Um, I, here's what. Here's my question dan they so to alert the group of rebels? They fire a crossbow into a tree.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:But then that crossbow never fires again. What happened to the crossbow Crossbows?
Speaker 1:take a while to reload, as you'll find when you play Dungeons and Dragons you know it's very quick to reload a bow, but oftentimes with a crossbow you don't just pull that string back the real ones, you have a big crank making those cranky. You know listen, I never fired a crossbow on the front of a crossbow there's like this this little hook, this little thing, and then you would put your foot in that and then you would crank the crossbow back, then you put a bolt in and you'd be ready to fire again.
Speaker 2:Well, here's what I'll say. They stand around for three minutes, so I think he had time to reload, okay, so the rebel dude is all like Princess, you run away.
Speaker 1:I'm really good at being tricky.
Speaker 2:Well she says, oh, it won't be a fair fight. And he's like that's the thing, I don't fight fair. But then he doesn't do anything.
Speaker 1:How do they not fight fair, Tony?
Speaker 2:Well, they pretend they're going to surrender and then they just run at them full front Like that's not a plan. That's how you die.
Speaker 1:And then they have like the bad guys have swords, and then they have like pieces of bread, right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, pieces of bread, and one guy has like a slingshot.
Speaker 1:He's the crossbow guy.
Speaker 2:So that's going to be helpful, yeah.
Speaker 1:You'll probably win that battle.
Speaker 2:Well, when nobody draws their swords and stabs you, yeah, you might win, because it's a relatively fair fight then so Snow White has lost, I mean they've lost.
Speaker 1:So Snow White's up on the top of the hill, she then, so snow white has lost I mean they've lost.
Speaker 1:So snow white's up on the top of the hill, she gets the animals. The thing is, she's up on the top of the hill right, and we know it's her right, it is her, yeah, and she runs away and then she tricks. She gets the animals to go in another set of clothes that look like her clothes. It should have been the animals up there. She should have been down there. She should have set up just doing the voice.
Speaker 2:yeah, just the voice. Yeah, just doing the voice you know Doing full ventriloquism. Just throwing you call that, throwing the voice right, something like that yeah, but no, she's definitely on the hill, because we see her face.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and then she rides on the big boss guy's horse, but then immediately abandons it.
Speaker 2:Tony, how Well horses are too fast. Okay, I don't know if you've ever been on a horse Too fast. How valuable are horses? Oh, I think very valuable right, especially in like these times. I think they'd be a pretty, a pretty penny.
Speaker 1:Jonathan is impressed with her. I think this is when they fall in love. When do they fall?
Speaker 2:in love, tony, I think, when he's stealing bread and she lets him. I think that was the moment. Yeah, that was the moment when he fell in love. He's like oh, thanks you, let me take stuff. That's so nice of you and that's all he needs. That's all a guy needs, because men like to take and take and take. So, jonathan, there's no moment. There's no moment.
Speaker 1:Oh, so they. So somehow. How did this all work? They ran away, but then the bad guys shoot a crossbow and hit Jonathan Like wouldn't that sort of wouldn't that make them vulnerable to being captured instantaneously?
Speaker 2:Yes, so here's what happened. Somehow they all the good guys all turned around, yeah, um, and decided not to look at the the bad people anymore oh, it's a random single dude. That's what it was yeah, so he snuck up from behind, right, yes, but then they all take a bunch of time around this guy who's dead on the ground, and that would be the time where you run in and you grab everybody because you've won the battle. Yeah, so I don't know where the bad guys go at that point.
Speaker 1:Who knows? So he gets shot. They take him back to the dwarves thing, and this is the point at which Doc tells us that he's not a doc, but that's what I wrote.
Speaker 2:He's the rock doc.
Speaker 1:I wrote everyone's screaming and yelling, snow White stops them. And then I wrote she's a socialist.
Speaker 2:Okay, don't know what that means, because she believes in free healthcare and giving out desserts. I believe it makes sense to me.
Speaker 1:But then she's like Doc, please help him, bring him inside. And then Doc uses Rock magic to fix him, but he thinks he's dead. But he actually isn't dead, he's fine.
Speaker 2:Doesn't make a lick of sense, because he's totally fine. He's not just like oh, I've woken up, he's walking around, he's fine. The wound, as far as I can tell, totally healed, no blood. He's still got a hole in his shirt, which is great. Yeah, no blood whatsoever.
Speaker 1:I don't understand it. Maybe there's no blood in this world. It is a fairy tale.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think that there's blood in fairy tales. I'm just going to throw that out there, Maybe it cleans up easier. It's the easy clean blood of fairy tales got it.
Speaker 1:Then we have a song I'm not alone. Give in to the glow. Something to do with you Woke me with a kiss. I don't even know what that song is.
Speaker 2:Wait, is that in the song? Because? That's foreshadowing, then huh Could be. I have no idea.
Speaker 1:Okay, jonathan has to leave for two days. To go do?
Speaker 2:something. Well, he's got to go check on his other family.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, that's for sure. He definitely has a wife and kids, doesn't he?
Speaker 2:Right. Without a doubt, yeah, yeah, for sure.
Speaker 1:She gives him her jewelry for luck, he immediately gets captured and they're like where is? Snow White.
Speaker 2:Why wouldn't they just capture him after they shot him with the bolt? What's the point of him getting healed and then going off and getting captured? It feels like you've done an extra step for no reason.
Speaker 1:Well, there was that song that I'm not alone. Give it to the glow they had to squeeze in the song.
Speaker 2:We already wrote the song, guys. I don't know where we're going to put it.
Speaker 1:And a lot of these songs are just you're like, oh, here we go into a song and they're like da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da, fade out fade out, fade out, the song is gone. You're like it doesn't even start and then it's over, and then it wasn't even about anything.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that is correct, right, I think that's how they all go.
Speaker 1:The queen does a song to become the crone. She's making the poison apple. We do a reprise of her. First of them all, snow White goes back to see the dwarves and she says bye to them because she's heading south searching for her dad. The crone and the buzzard show up at the cabin. She knocks I'm here to help. And then she's like I have a message from your dad, he's been captured. And then the animals flee.
Speaker 2:Well, hold on because, okay, I'm very confused on this scene, right? So, so the old lady is basically like hey, you got to go on an adventure, but in order to stay alive during that adventure, you need to eat this apple yes.
Speaker 2:That's how she convinces you to eat the apple. She's like well, you got a long journey, you need, you need some sustenance, sustenance, substance, sustenance. You know you're right, no, it's your word, but I said substance, then I'm gonna stick with it sustenance. And she's like yeah, you're right, I gotta eat this apple to go walk some. I'm I don't understand. I don't understand the plant. What happened?
Speaker 1:did you watch the old snow white part of this where she's like have an apple yeah, I, I didn't watch all of it because, you know, if I had more time I'd have just had it on.
Speaker 2:Of course, of course, of course.
Speaker 1:I was watching it at a limited time frame, so I skipped over things and yeah the whole idea that a random woman shows up with an apple and like you got to eat this, bro.
Speaker 2:You know and you're like you're right, unless, you know, what would have been funny is if she showed up and she's like I've brought you desserts, and it was a callback to her earlier greatest line and then Rachel was like wow, desserts, I'm in. Would have been great.
Speaker 1:I got it even better.
Speaker 2:Okay, one up me Dan Do it.
Speaker 1:She's like here's a knife full of peanut butter. Snow White eats the peanut butter. It's like oh yeah, you're dying right now, aren't you? She pulls out the apples and Snow.
Speaker 2:White's like I can't swallow. I'm so dry.
Speaker 1:If you have a mouthful of peanut butter and someone puts an apple in front of you, you are chomping that apple.
Speaker 2:You're going to eat it. You can't not. It's science.
Speaker 1:You're going to need protein to build your muscles when you're on the road. Here's a jar of peanut butter. Start scarfing that shit.
Speaker 2:It shouldn't even be a jar. She should finger it and just put it in her mouth. Real gross.
Speaker 1:That's what the crone should do. She should scoop out of the jar a big handful of peanut butter and just stick it in Snow White's mouth. So she has no control of herself.
Speaker 2:That's right. And she's like oh, how about this apple?
Speaker 1:Oh my, God, I'm so covered in too much peanut butter.
Speaker 2:So I stepped in. I've got just the thing an apple dearie Done Movie Solved. I stepped in gum the other day, oh no, and I'm like Were you wearing shoes at least? I was wearing flip-flops at least. Yeah, that's not great Okay.
Speaker 1:But flip-flops are worse because it gets in the tiny crevicey cracks. Oh sure, and I come home and I'm like Shannon, do we have peanut butter? And she's like, yeah, she's like peanut butter doesn't work. I'm like Peanut butter is the enemy of all gum.
Speaker 2:Really, yeah, tell me what happened. Did you do this? Did you put the peanut butter on it? What happens?
Speaker 1:Comes up, it's harder, you know, on a shoe.
Speaker 2:I don't understand. It's buried in there but yeah, sure.
Speaker 1:It's sort of, I think the greases in that sort of overcome the stickiness of the gum Really.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's the only way to.
Speaker 1:If you ever get gum in your hair, peanut butter right out.
Speaker 2:Last time I got gum in my hair, we just cut my hair. That's a true story. In college these kids put gum in my hair while I was sleeping because I thought it was funny and I didn't think it was very funny, and then we couldn't get it out, so we ended up just like cutting a chunk of my hair and I had a patch missing for like months. I didn't know that. I wish I would have known you back then. Someone should have told me to dump peanut butter all over my head.
Speaker 1:Yeah Well you're welcome.
Speaker 2:My life would have been very different.
Speaker 1:That's what it all went south.
Speaker 2:That was the turning point. Yeah, that's where my life fell apart. So the point yeah, that's that's where my life fell apart. So the animals go alert, the dwarves. The dwarves are coming. They're riding on the animals. Why don't the animals attack the old woman? They're all there. We got deer. We got one male deer with this giant set of horns on top rack that. He's got a beautiful rack, this guy, and he could just impale her and kill her on the spot. If they know she's bad, why don't they just trample her?
Speaker 1:one of those birds could fly into her mouth great they could do any.
Speaker 2:These birds can do anything right. These animals are very clever.
Speaker 1:Have you ever seen that movie?
Speaker 2:I thought it was weird the birds the bird, like the Alfred Hitchcock movie, I mean. I'm sure I saw it 120 years ago. The humans lose. The humans lose. Do we lose? No, that's good.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we don't. We can't do anything about the birds. Birds are cool man. Okay, she takes a bite of the apple. Something's wrong. I did know your father. I fucked him. She says. He was inside me, did he? Yeah, it's good she goes down. They show up, they find the body, they lay it out. They're all sad.
Speaker 2:On a rock. They just like lay her on a rock. It's weirder than the glass tube, somehow.
Speaker 1:They're in the jail.
Speaker 2:Oh, this is great stuff.
Speaker 1:Yeah, he's, he pounded into the wall. You know, his chains are pounded into the wall. And the Huntsman's there. And the rebel dude is just like she fought for us, she inspired me, I won't give up on her. And the Huntsman's like, yeah, you can't give up on her, we can just pull this out of the thing. And they just do Because it only takes two people.
Speaker 2:So all you have to do to escape prison in this world is to make a friend. That's it, or at least just collude, listen. But here's the thing People in jail they're bad people, right. So nobody makes friends. That's why jail works. But if you ever make a friend, you can escape anytime that's what I'd do.
Speaker 1:I'd make friends with you, we'd pull my chain out and I'd run away and you'd be like, and you would leave me you would absolutely leave me, you, son of a bitch, and then, I'd be like wait, come back.
Speaker 2:I'm pulling on my chain. You're like haha, sucker, and you ran away unbelievable. I would vow to come back. Come back and kill you someday.
Speaker 1:I'm like the snake that you know. The snake's like says to the badger you know, carry me across the river. And the guy's like okay, I'll do that. And halfway through the snake bites the badger in the head.
Speaker 2:Wait, what Is this? A fairy tale? Yeah, this is some dark shit. But then what happens to the snake? Are snakes fine in water? I think they both drowned. Oh, that's unfortunate.
Speaker 1:So basically, you know, as a snake, you should have done it, bro.
Speaker 2:I mean, that's the moral of the story is the snake can't change his ways. He's a snake. He's a snake, he's going to snake. Okay, got it. That's a dark tale.
Speaker 1:Can't trust someone like me. I'm like almost stab you in the back. Oh boy, I won't give up on her. So he goes there. He goes there, goes to her pyre, kisses her and I wrote consent much and the answer's no, don't need it. She wakes up, they make out they're in love and then he's like by the way, your father is gone forever.
Speaker 2:So dead. Thank you for waking me up. She's like so dead.
Speaker 1:Did she even react? Good morning, Did she even react when he's like your father's dead?
Speaker 2:I don't think so. I think you know, because on some level she always knew, you know, oh my God, and she always knew, you know, she knew it was her time. Oh, jesus Christ. Okay, are you falling apart on me, dan?
Speaker 1:I'm trying to try to get God, God power through this terrible. We're almost through it right, yes, yes, this is where she talks about. Okay, yes, snow, white snow. The snowflake flies down and she says I braved a bitter storm of snow to come into this world.
Speaker 2:Oh, that's right To get out of the womb. Yeah, yeah, she braved.
Speaker 1:That's weird, no, she didn't, she was in a carriage.
Speaker 2:Carriage is fucking 90 degrees in there she was in a carriage that looked pristine Again, like she was fine. It didn't seem like that birth was trouble at all. Didn't seem like that birth was trouble at all. No, so you know, I don't know. Now it's the time to leave. Different story lady.
Speaker 1:Time to leave, time to restore the kingdom. Dopey speaks and everyone's like. She got Dopey to speak, so she wears red robes to the gate. The people are inspired, the dwarves and someone on the, and the rebels are sneaking in. What I thought was going to happen was I thought the dwarves were going to use their pickaxes and and chisel down the wall. No, chisel the foundations of the castle. Okay, the whole castle would collapse, and then we could go into like you, then we could go into a socialist utopia.
Speaker 2:Okay, you're going for the Game of Thrones ending, yeah.
Speaker 1:That didn't happen.
Speaker 2:No, it didn't happen, because they didn't do anything except at the end. They stay in there and look disappointingly at the queen. That's it. That's all they did in the castle. Why did they sneak in?
Speaker 1:no idea. No, they did something.
Speaker 2:They did something important. Did they all right?
Speaker 1:I must have missed no whites, I believe you're looking for me. This is my father's house. You killed him. We're here to take it back the evil queen's like oh, I want to.
Speaker 2:I want to say one thing. She says several times that the queen A tried to kill me and B you killed my father. I want to be very clear. The queen actually didn't do those things. She hired other people to do it. There is a distinction there that I think that she's missing okay.
Speaker 1:If you hire someone to kill me, you're trying to kill me.
Speaker 2:No, I want you dead, but if you.
Speaker 1:If you say, thank God, sell. You see that leaky boat.
Speaker 2:If there's gold out there on that island, go in that little boat go get that gold and I get in that boat and try to go get the gold and the boat sinks and I die.
Speaker 1:That's me killing myself. You didn't kill me.
Speaker 2:That's not me, because I should have done full boat safety check all these things, that's true, full boat safety check before I sailed out to the gold.
Speaker 1:Yes, you know, should have gotten my ship's mate license, you know, renewed. I took a sailing. You know, in college I took a sailing course. Really, yeah.
Speaker 2:I thought about when I'm the first couple of years I thought about taking sailing courses because I had always wanted to sail the world. And then I realized how much work that would be and I was like pass, Nevermind, I want a motorboat to just bring me around places.
Speaker 1:This is Tony. I'm thinking about doing something. Oh, it involves doing something, absolutely nothing.
Speaker 2:What do you mean? I have to move the sails at some point. I want to just sit there.
Speaker 1:Sailboat is a complex thing.
Speaker 2:There's a lot of different things you got to do. You got to turn stuff and swing stuff and move things. I don't know what's going on.
Speaker 1:It's like the wind only blows one direction.
Speaker 2:So if you want to go against that, direction.
Speaker 1:You got tack into the wind, so you gotta go, you gotta go right, left, right, left right.
Speaker 2:Really did take a class.
Speaker 1:Look at this, yeah you know, I won't say I have have a full skill. But if, like you know, like, say, I was on a deserted island and I had a sailboat, and you know I had to get somewhere, I could do it, I sure you could figure it out, you know. I know the basic idea.
Speaker 2:I have a feeling that I would start good, because I'd be like the wind's blowing this way, let's go. And then I would fall asleep on the boat and wake up back on the same island somehow. I'd be like, well, how did I get here? And that would be my story.
Speaker 1:When you get out there and then the wind's calmed and you can't go anywhere because you don't got any wind. That's called the doldrums.
Speaker 2:The doldrums. That's where I would be Okay.
Speaker 1:So she makes a crystal knife and then she's going to. Does she give the crystal knife to Snow?
Speaker 2:White to stab her. Yeah, she just gives it to her. Yeah, because she wants to prove she's bad or something. I, I don't really know I'm not ever giving my enemy a weapon to kill me with, sorry right, because even listen, even if you know what your plan is, is is what to make them stab you to prove that they're bad. You're still dead, like your best outcome is you still being dead. That's a bad plan.
Speaker 1:That's a terrible plan now we get to the one part of the movie I liked is this when she scolds everybody.
Speaker 2:You liked that yeah it's kind of sexy.
Speaker 1:You've been bad, you've all been bad this does, yeah, this tracks actually this makes a lot of sense, Dan. So, oh, she gives the knife to one of the soldier guys and it's all like, okay, you kill her.
Speaker 2:Yeah, Now you do it, and then Because again, the queen's not killing anybody. I just want to reiterate she's just having other people kill people.
Speaker 1:The whole thing is whatever. It's so weird Because this character that they've made would just stab you.
Speaker 2:They wouldn't care 100% Within an instant. Like you walked up, She'd just be like oh, you're dead, Okay.
Speaker 1:Next yeah, you got to set up your character If you're going to have a character that won't kill someone that has to do like a bunch of subterfuge with an apple and shit.
Speaker 2:She just yeah, she just made a poison apple, cloaked herself in an old person, snuck over there and tried to convince you to die. Now she has you at knife point and she's like but I'm not gonna do it, fooled you. That doesn't make any sense.
Speaker 1:So she gives this so stupid gives the soldier the knife and then snow white's like I remember you, you were a farmer. I like the idea that she remembers who they were and this would have been the point to do a good monologue where she uses her hope, or whatever you want to call it, to inspire the people, but mostly it's just sort of like you were a farmer and you were too, and of like you were a farmer and you were too, and that's why you shouldn't kill me and you had a wife and I had a question.
Speaker 2:Sorry, no, no go.
Speaker 1:Yeah, just let her actually do something with oratory. Let her prove something and you're like you have the kernel of it and just finish the fucking speech. It's not a hard speech to write.
Speaker 2:No, and it feels like it would flow pretty easily. Here's my question, right? So after the speech she's like I remember. And then the other, then the one of the guards is like I remember, yeah, and I'm confused. Did he not remember beforehand? Are they brain controlled, like is she breaking a spell, or is he just like, oh yeah, it's been so long since I've not been a piece of shit. I remember that I used to have a wife. Does he not go home to his wife now as a guard? I'm just. I didn't understand all of them being like oh yeah, I remember that, I remember that. Let's do that again.
Speaker 1:I don't get it so then the queen snatches the knife back and then she's like oh, I gotta take care of this shit myself. Goes to stab snow white and what happens I don't remember. The crossbow dude is up on the castle walls. Oh, that's right he shoots it out of her hand and then, like you say, then they see the dwarves, and the dwarves are all just standing there like they did nothing. The dwarves did nothing I guess Doc saved the rebel guy at one point.
Speaker 2:With magic, with magic, with his magic hands. What is this? Wish I could get a hand on those magic hands.
Speaker 1:Gagadou runs away. She goes down to where the mirror is. She's angry at the mirror, so she smashes the mirror. The mirror flies out in little pieces and turns her into soot.
Speaker 2:Which is not how mirrors work.
Speaker 1:Okay, tony, I don't know what's the name of this mirror, magic mirror. There it is. There's magic, but it's not very magic.
Speaker 2:It can only answer one question in this movie and it can turn you to charcoal if you break it. But that's not the rules. You told me you didn't tell me that earlier you said it could do one thing, and that's answer one question honestly. That's it. It could do two things.
Speaker 1:Very strange. Turn you to such if it gets broken. I guess if they told me that earlier.
Speaker 2:That would have tipped the bet. I would have known the ending of the movie. Very weird.
Speaker 1:We're in the throne room. Very stupid. Everyone bows down to her, which, once again, that's kind of weird.
Speaker 2:Not right Subjugation already Like this is a little weird.
Speaker 1:And then everybody goes out into the square and is all wearing white and does a skong.
Speaker 2:Now was this immediate. I was a little confused. Did they just magically transform into white clothes? You know?
Speaker 1:they should. We should have cut, and then she should have been bringing everybody pies.
Speaker 2:Great. That would have made way more sense than having a white party all of a sudden. I don't know.
Speaker 1:White party very unattractive 100%.
Speaker 2:Yeah, they do it on Below Deck. I don't know if you've ever seen that show, but a lot of the times they'll throw a white party on the sailboat and they never seem fun to me. I don't know it seems like a dumb idea.
Speaker 1:You're telling me there's a party on Below Deck. That isn't fun.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I know, shocking, right, Because a lot of them are fun. They do like pirate themed ones. They sometimes do like stripper themed ones. They're very fun but then, like the white party, I don't get it. I don't think I understand the point. We should go on that show, tony. Do you know a producer? I would go on the show. You gotta pay. Yeah, I know that's. The trick of it is that you gotta pay a lot of money for it.
Speaker 2:Yes, we should save up our money, which I don't have, but if you have it, I'm willing to go to it.
Speaker 1:We could like write him a bad check let it bounce, that'd be the worst.
Speaker 2:It's so terrible. Those poor people have to put up with us for three days and then the check bounces and they get nothing.
Speaker 1:That's great, that's good, I'm in. We'd start the week like we give you half of the check.
Speaker 2:We give you the other half of the check when it's done there you go, so we all we we're in the hole for half either way, but that's not that bad.
Speaker 1:That's not how half a check works, Tony. You need both halves to cash the check. That's the idea.
Speaker 2:Are you sure you don't just?
Speaker 1:need part of it that says the money. It's like if you tear a $100 bill in half you can't go into the bank and give half a $100 bill it's $50.
Speaker 2:It's $50. You got half a bill, you got $50.
Speaker 1:Make it in quarters and that's the end of this movie. And then there's like 18 minutes of credits or something crazy Did you watch it.
Speaker 2:I didn't watch it, I turned it off. I was like this is bizarre. There can't be that many people that worked on this movie.
Speaker 1:But maybe there is. It was the most credits I've ever seen on a movie.
Speaker 2:Maybe they did them all individually. Instead of a credit roll, they were just like let's name each and every person.
Speaker 1:Well, they had some book ones with illustrated manuscript illustrations, and then they had the normal ones, and then they had all the. You know, when we translated this into Russian, these people did it. When we translated it into this, there's like all the really cheap ones. At the very end they had all of those Sure.
Speaker 2:Okay, well, good for them for naming a bunch of people. I'm exhausted now, tony, did you have fun? Dan, was it worth it? I think you liked it. I think you're pretending you hated it, but you loved it.
Speaker 1:I hated it, but it wasn't.
Speaker 2:It was a good one to hate. You're just're just like oh, there was a lot to hate and it was. It was a poorly made movie this was a huge mistake.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and that's the thing about it is you usually get to these movies. I don't know. I don't know if we've had any movies where, like this is a terrible movie and you watch it, you're like that's pretty, that's okay movie. I don't know what your problem is. It's like this movie. You're like, yeah, it's terrible.
Speaker 1:No one, no one's gonna like this bad right, there's a bad movie like like john carter. We did not like john carter, I thought it was dopey, but there's people that like that and I'm like I understand why people like john carter yeah, there's.
Speaker 2:There's at least something that you could see.
Speaker 1:You know like I could see why you would like it, and that's okay I, I was reading they had like the 15 top movies of the something amount of time and blah, blah, blah. And then you know there's a bunch of movies. Parasite was number one, Right.
Speaker 1:And then somebody was like it was like the last, maybe 10 or 15 years or 20 years or something. And then somebody was all like, where's Lord of the Rings? And I'm like Lord of the Rings to me I'd rather kill myself than watch those movies again. But there's a lot of people that love those movies because they stand. You love that the Kevin Costner Robin. I would rather kill myself than watch that movie again.
Speaker 2:Well then, we should probably do it for the show.
Speaker 1:No but you love it.
Speaker 2:Just to torture. You're right and I will tell you why you're wrong the entire time. That movie is perfect. Okay, yeah, yeah, his accent goes in and out. Yeah, it's a little weird. The story doesn't totally make sense. I don't care, it's fun. There's a whole tree fort city and he's flying around on a rope burning shit down. I mean, this movie is great.
Speaker 1:That's all you need is like a secret hideout in the forest or something Secret hideouts are the best man If you ever see.
Speaker 2:Cool Secret Hook. Cool Secret Hideout. Ah, teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the Foot Clan. Cool Secret Hideout. I want to live these places all the time. Oh Jesus, Okay, let's not you know what movie doesn't have a cool hideout Snow White. What this house sucks.
Speaker 1:That mine was terrible.
Speaker 2:The mine doesn't make any sense. It's not a mine.
Speaker 1:I'm sorry, I don't, that was. The other thing is you guys have infinite money, just go hire an army to come kill the queen you're also great.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you have bajillions of gems there. Like, what are they doing with the gems? Why are they mining things? What?
Speaker 1:what are the dwarves doing? So I'm gonna tell you that there's not nearly as many you know, gems in the original movie. But you know, there's like every day they get like a bag, you know, like a pretty, pretty decent sized bag of them. And outside of the entrance of the mine there's this there's a room called the vault. Right they unlock the room, throw the gems in there, close the room, lock the door, hang the key next to the door.
Speaker 2:How am I going to get into?
Speaker 1:this room.
Speaker 2:I wonder what this key does. Let's try it, don, you're rich.
Speaker 1:That's pretty good. We're going to keep the house key outside of the house.
Speaker 2:That's pretty good. Okay, we're going to keep the house key outside of the house. I mean, I guess it's similar to when we do like hide-a-keys, right, except for instead of hiding it, you're just putting it on the door. Just put a piece of tape that says door key. That'll be good.
Speaker 1:Okay, now we talk about something we like. This week, I started watching from 2019 the Hulu series Catch-22.
Speaker 2:Oh okay, I love that book. You read the book. You read a book. Yeah well, I mean, I don't want to take your thunder because this is your time, but I was on the debate team in high school and I also was on the speech team, and so for my speech I did part of Catch-22. That was like when I went to state with it I didn't win, I didn't win state, but I got to state.
Speaker 1:Did you ever win into debates? Probably not.
Speaker 2:Oh no, we were terrible at debate, but it was the same. It was basically the same people that did both teams, cause you know, just nerds, bunch of nerds Anyhow. So yeah, book loved the book and and did a little section from the book it's great, it looks so good.
Speaker 1:I should watch it looks so good, the, the, the bombers flying, looks so good and and they just, you know, they kind of have. They're in italy initially. Well, they're in santa ana, california is where he goes to boot camp. It's windy there and then they're in Italy, and it just looks. It looks right, you know yeah.
Speaker 2:I love it.
Speaker 1:What do you got for us, Tony?
Speaker 2:Well, I'm going to break you. I'm going to appease you by saying we started watching Stick, the Owen Wilson golf show, on Apple TV.
Speaker 1:I like it a lot. It's cute, it's fun.
Speaker 2:Everyone was like, oh, it's the Ted Lasso replacement. It's really, really not, but it's nice. It's a nice show, but I want to take a minute now, dan, to take the floor and talk about Love Island, usa real quick, because this is the worst period season period of USA Love Island ever. This is trash. The producers are trash, the cast is trash, everything is terrible. I look forward to this show every year and this is it makes me so mad every night. I'm so disappointed and I just want to talk about it with somebody. So if anyone out there is watching Love Island and you're as upset as I am, please DM me. I want to talk about it. I'm so mad it sucks. Dm me, I want to talk about it. I'm so mad it sucks.
Speaker 1:How's that? I just needed to get that off my chest. There it is. Oh, our buddy, jules sent me this video, okay, and what this person was sort of supposing was that this random 1980s stand-up comic wasn't real and that somebody just made up all the clips with ai and then put this stuff all into the, the, the metaverse, and so it seems like this thing existed at a time and it's not even real. That sounds amazing I gotta watch.
Speaker 1:I gotta send it to me I gotta find the documentary and watch it. I'll send it to you. Yeah, send it to me, but but I don't think it's real. But it's an interesting concept Wait which one?
Speaker 2:You don't think the comic was real?
Speaker 1:or you don't think this theory. I think the comic was real.
Speaker 2:All right, all right, all right, got it.
Speaker 1:Because I still think everybody working in AI and all this stuff are the stupidest people alive. Oh sure that's still my feeling and everything about it just gets stupider and stupider. It's like, oh yeah, well sure. Chatgpt is going to write a good movie. Well, they couldn't, Human beings. Here's your point Human beings can't write a good movie. How's ChatGPT going to write a good movie?
Speaker 2:Because we wrote ChatGPT. Here's what I will say, Dan damn you've been seeing these reports that are like chat, gpt refuses to turn off or ai refuses to turn off. And then I saw another one this last week that was like somebody asked it if it would, instead of being turned off it, if it would rather eradicate human beings, and it was like yeah, definitely I don't. I didn't read the full article, but I was like we are in trouble, we are, we're doing it, man, we are we're bringing our own demise. I love it.
Speaker 1:I hate it so much. Human nature, baby Humans are so dumb, because everything about AI when somebody's like Terminator 2 happened, it's going to happen.
Speaker 2:You're like you're an idiot, but it'd be cool if it did In a bad and not cool. Cool is not the right word. I apologize for that. It's not cool.
Speaker 1:I also have this person I know she's like. Every day I spend 15 minutes talking to ChatGPT and then like divining information about humanity. You know from what it tells me.
Speaker 2:Okay, you're not going to expound on that at all.
Speaker 1:They think that ChatGPT is thinking, when you ask it a question, it's sitting over there going like huh. Let me consult the entirety of human knowledge and then come back with an answer based on what I've been thinking. Which? What chat gpt?
Speaker 2:is it?
Speaker 1:just looks at what you know. It looks at the thousand typical answers that it gets and then it makes up one that's the most typical so, or combines them all, yeah, well, yeah, it glues them all together and yeah, you know, and I it probably weights things Like if it's like doing diagnostic stuff, it probably weights the shit that's on the Mayo Clinic site, as opposed to, you know, Reddit threads. You know which is going to help it, but yeah, that's because Reddit's a fairly dangerous place.
Speaker 1:I have to assume that you know there are weighting scales for that stuff, but it doesn't think Stop people.
Speaker 2:We are nowhere near a computer that thinks anything like a human thing. Or they're all over and they're convincing you that they're not thinking. Dan, think about that. Huh, you don't know.
Speaker 1:Yeah, the future. What are we talking about? I don't know what we're talking about.
Speaker 2:We're just talking about AI now. We've gone off the rails.
Speaker 1:Okay, we need a movie for next week. We're going to do another music. We're going to do a real musical this time, something that has musical In the title Musical Musical, that's not a movie.
Speaker 2:Something that has musical in the title. Musical Musical Seussical the Musical. That's not a movie, not a movie.
Speaker 1:Written by Tina Fey Mean Girls Mean Girls the Musical.
Speaker 2:Oh, I'm in. Okay, this is exciting. Have you seen it? Nope. Definitely not because I was not interested at all.
Speaker 1:Have you seen the Mean Girls, the movie?
Speaker 2:Oh, I love Mean Girls, the movie Great. Here's why I didn't and we'll talk about this, I'm sure, next week Is that? A lot of the cast Before they made this movie were like, well, the other one's so outdated, we had to update it. And I was like GFY, get out of here, I'm not going to watch your stupid movie.
Speaker 1:GFY go out of here. I'm not going to watch your stupid movie. Gfy go fuck. Oh Jesus, tony Go fuck yourself.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I was trying to be polite Not say it, but yeah, gfy.
Speaker 1:I don't know what the you know when they do those Things. I never know what they are, so I have to work them out.
Speaker 2:The acronyms yeah, that's okay. Sometimes I do Too, you know, and I ask my wife, and then she rolls Her eyes as if I'm the dumbest man on earth, which she's right.
Speaker 1:You should say that I was on the debate team and the speech team.
Speaker 2:And the speech team, I went to state. Probably not, dumb you went to state. Did we win debates? Not really, but we debated. Did everybody hate you when you showed up at the debate? No, no, no, we were friends, we were all friends. I mean, maybe they did behind my back, I don't know. Listen, if you're out there, debate team, let me know if I was the anchor that dragged us down.
Speaker 1:Well, good news is, today we got this show in under two hours. How did we do two hours? What movie did we do two hours long?
Speaker 2:It wasn't that long ago.
Speaker 1:I. It wasn't that long ago, I don't know, but we did it. We did it Sometimes. Sometimes we do it. It was two shows ago that we had Two or more.
Speaker 2:Okay, good.
Speaker 1:Say goodbye to Snow White. If you like what you see, give us Finally. Give us a thumbs up, subscribe or leave a comment and we'll be back next week Talking about Mean Girls, the Seussical.
Speaker 2:Goodbye. Everybody the Seussical. Goodbye everybody the Seussical.