Hate Watching with Dan and Tony
Hate Watching with Dan and Tony
Hate Watching Strange Magic
Ready to take an animated roller-coaster ride into the fantastical world of Strange Magic? Join Dan and Tony as they delve into the peculiarities, plot holes, and questionable decisions that make this 2015 film a head-scratcher. From its hefty price tag to an oddly chosen soundtrack, we're left wondering what went on in the production meetings.
As we delve deeper into the mystical mayhem of Strange Magic, things get even stranger. We tackle the controversial themes that lurk beneath the film's surface like, which kid's movie teaches that love needs to be forcibly obtained? And why is the Bog King's character design so outlandishly odd? Don't get us started on Sonny the elf. And of course, we can't ignore the convoluted love potion subplot, which seems a weak explanation for sudden romantic feelings. We also mull over the missed opportunity of Kelly Clarkson's song. So, join us as we try to make sense of this jumbled jigsaw of a film, toss around sequel ideas, and devise a new business venture for our lovable Bog King. Tune in to our lively discussion and maybe, just maybe, you might find a strange kind of magic in it!
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Dan: @shakybacon
Tony: @tonydczech
And follow the podcast on IG: @hatewatchingDAT
Wow look, tony decided to show up. I'm sorry I'm late Listen to this shit. Dan Excuse me At 8.45. I put in an order for McDonald's, oh my god For Postmates.
Speaker 2:Your McDonald's order didn't come on time.
Speaker 1:It didn't come at all.
Speaker 2:Oh my god, i was still waiting.
Speaker 1:I was still waiting at 10.01. I was like well, i guess I'm fucking canceling this order then. Unbelievable.
Speaker 2:Welcome to Hey Watching with Dan and Tony. I'm Dan, i'm Tony, and we're the guys that watch the movies that no one's ever heard of, to make fun of them.
Speaker 1:I feel like most weeks we're not those guys. This week we are those guys. It's a fun mix up.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's um. yeah, each week one of us picked a movie. this week I picked the movie and I found this obscure classic from 2015 called Strange Magic, which is from the mind and story and and mixed tape of George Lucas, who Yeah, i don't like his musical taste.
Speaker 1:Spoiler alert Dude.
Speaker 2:He was like I read one of the things he was talking about it how he like when he did American graffiti. Yeah, one of the great all time movies of all time.
Speaker 1:For sure.
Speaker 2:Yeah, nostalgia, great soundtrack. He's why he wanted to get the Beatles songs and he couldn't afford them back then. Yeah, And like this movie. He could afford anything.
Speaker 1:And then he just got a bunch of bullshit. There's songs in here I've never even heard of. Why would you make a mixed tape movie and put songs to people in 2015. Will not know.
Speaker 2:More importantly, why would you make a mixed tape thing and then have them sing 30 seconds of a song of triple?
Speaker 1:speed with it's more. It's not. It's not so much a mixed tape as it is an iPod shuffle mode, you know. So it's just like kind of go No, that's not the one, that's not the one. Next song, i can't find the one I like it's at point five speed but you can't, because it's digital What you watch it on your phone. you can throw that.
Speaker 2:Oh my god what.
Speaker 1:Yeah, this is Oh boy, dan, get out, there are, there are. there are movies that we do that I laugh at a lot and I have a good time because they're so bad. I only laughed twice in this movie and the rest of it I just spent with my job. I was like what is what is happening? Who? who wrote this? What were they thinking, and why is Dan making me watch it? That was going through my head the whole time.
Speaker 2:You got, you got, you got to get a guess, tony, how much money you think this movie was purported to have cost.
Speaker 1:I think this cost a bunch of money. I think 80 million, 70 to 100 million dollars Oh man, i was right on the money. That's too much. You can make this movie for about $15. Give or take, other than the fact that he got relatively famous people to do the movie and then they were terrible. Did? he Isn't Alfred Molina in this movie.
Speaker 2:I think Alfred Molina was the bar kid, i think so. Doing an impression of Mike Myers doing track. Oh, that's, that's good, oh.
Speaker 1:God there's.
Speaker 2:Well see, i watched like the first half an hour of this movie and I was like, and then you quit, son of a bitch. I was like, okay, i got to watch another movie, another animated movie that I know is good. You know, not, not, not a movie I watch all the time. I'm like I'll put on track.
Speaker 1:I'll put on Shrek. It's a good one.
Speaker 2:Which I enjoyed, a movie I totally enjoyed. Yeah, i want to see what happened in Shrek and you watch Shrek and Shrek, just it lives in its, its little moments, all its little things.
Speaker 1:Sure, it just goes there, it just makes sense. It's a story that makes sense.
Speaker 2:First of all, step one It's little jokes or it's jokes, and you're just like you know. Am I rolling on the floor laughing? no, but I'm like. You know. Eddie Murphy makes a tic-tac joke. Normally, dan Goodson's gonna be angry about that, because it's like there are no tic-tacs in this world. I'm Dan.
Speaker 1:Goodson. I'm like That is very Dan Goodson. Me, on the other hand, love it.
Speaker 2:I love it I love it.
Speaker 1:Remember when she pulls out the Pringles and Ghostbusters? You were so mad, so angry.
Speaker 2:You know, and that's the thing you know. I don't fault you for liking the Pringles, because if you buy that kind of thing, it's a joke.
Speaker 1:Everybody that's listening to this episode. Go back to the Ghostbusters episode and see if that's true. If Dan Goodson really didn't fault me for liking that joke, i don't think that's accurate, dan.
Speaker 2:You know I'm warming up to it. I'm not warming up to it.
Speaker 1:Looking back, maybe you're a little more lenient now.
Speaker 2:But I mean, that's the whole thing, is we all make those assessments as they go along. You know how much reality you want in your movie. You know it's like Old West and you know they're talking about watching Netflix and you're like what's going on. You know we've watched a lot of science fiction future movies where they're like completely speaking in the colloquial of now.
Speaker 1:Yeah, this movie is made in 2012.
Speaker 2:Did they do that in that 65 million movie? that one was.
Speaker 1:No one spoke, sorry Yeah nobody spoke at all, so they were trying to tiptoe right around that one, dan, they watch our podcast and they're like well, let's not do that, let's just not have them communicate. If nobody can talk, no one will know when this movie takes place.
Speaker 2:So yeah, strange Magic 15 years. George Lucas thought about this, so he thought the best person to hire as the director was a sound engineer.
Speaker 1:That's making some sense already.
Speaker 2:Does this make some sense in this movie that? is so fiercely painful to listen to. I mean visually, you kind of you know bad.
Speaker 1:That's why it makes sense What I meant was as the director. it makes sense that this movie looks and feels the way it does because it's not directed by a person that's ever seen a movie before. It's only directed by a guy that's seen bits and pieces of a movie and a sound for them.
Speaker 2:But I mean, don't you think somebody that was like a sound engineer would? Is it like the way this movie sounds, one of the biggest problems of this movie?
Speaker 1:Saying one of the biggest problems is a bit of an oxymoron to me. It's every single facet of the movie is a huge problem, but I understand what you're saying. Here's what I would posit. I don't know, because you know sound people. There's different jobs in the genre, right?
Speaker 2:So a sound engineer, well, he's like I don't know, just sound engineer, but he's like a big sound.
Speaker 1:So now you don't know now you might be sending me mixed signals here. I'm just gonna say it's like an engineer is more the technical guy as opposed to like the art side of it. Right, i don't. I guess I don't really know enough about my sound design to speak properly about this. But my biggest problem is that nobody can sing in this movie. and I'm pretty sure they all can sing in real life, i like. I'm pretty sure that they have fine voices, but in this movie they all sound terrible.
Speaker 2:He's a sound editor.
Speaker 1:Exactly, he's an editor, so he doesn't know. you know, he's just making sure that the ins and your out sound good. Your transitions are on point Right, so he's fine.
Speaker 2:He's only won seven Academy Awards. That doesn't make you.
Speaker 1:For what? what? give me a list.
Speaker 2:Give me a list for everything He did, the sound best sound for West Side Story. Oh, he did add Astra. kick him in the balls for that movie.
Speaker 1:Bridget Spies, lincoln. The sound in that is actually quite nice.
Speaker 2:It's not.
Speaker 1:It's not the sounds fault.
Speaker 2:I found the problem. He worked on finding me, finding Nemo, finding Nemo guy. There it is.
Speaker 1:God, you hate finding Nemo so much. I can't wait to do that someday, but I love it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so Gary Lindstrom. The only other thing he really directed was a couple of Pixar shorts, including one where the Toy Story characters Imagine they're in a Hawaiian vacation night. I pulled up a six minute masterpiece and it seemed like a direct to video kind of piece of.
Speaker 1:Yeah, i'm sure it just ran in front of a different movie. You know what I mean, yeah.
Speaker 2:Or on a video tape, or whatever.
Speaker 1:Yeah Yeah On your old VHS.
Speaker 2:I still love VHS, this movie hour and 42 minutes Way too long for what it is.
Speaker 1:There's about 12 minutes of story in this movie and about an hour of music. That doesn't make any sense, and then there's a bunch of extra stuff that I don't even know what was going on. This is terrible.
Speaker 2:Shrek 90 minutes, including credits.
Speaker 1:There you go. That's great For an animated film. That's perfect. You're in, you're out, you're green. I love it.
Speaker 2:Shrek meets Naughty. They go rescue princess. They bring princess back. Princesses and ogre spoilers.
Speaker 1:Oh, i've never seen it, dad. Oh my God, oh my God.
Speaker 2:Oh, the stupid kids watching this. I just ruined their form Wow.
Speaker 1:And then you called them stupid. You called these poor Listen kids. If you're out, then you're listening. Good for you. Keep doing you, you're going to be great. Kids are stupid, right Kids are great.
Speaker 2:I mean, that's how they are. Kids are stupid.
Speaker 1:In general, kids are stupid, but they also think that we're stupid because we're old.
Speaker 2:They're very right, so it's a weird.
Speaker 1:So is anyone really stupid, or maybe everyone's stupid? Everyone's really stupid. Except me, except for Dan Goodsell, i'm definitely a bit stupid. I'll put that out there right now.
Speaker 2:So we have this story about two kingdoms. What are the two kingdoms? Tony, Fairy forest and dark forest, that'd be funnier if there were fairy forest and dark forest, fairy kingdom and dark forest.
Speaker 1:Don't give them names. Sorry, sorry, my fault Yeah.
Speaker 2:I know there's specifics on this thing.
Speaker 1:No no, no, no.
Speaker 2:You better make everything really bland.
Speaker 1:What is that? all that is in this world? then There's just these two things, and it's a whole world. I don't know.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:There's not even like separate kingdoms for the fair. There's only one fairy kingdom and the whole planet. I don't get it. I don't get it at all. You know who? I would expect to have a little bit more clarity. George Lucas This guy built Star Wars. Right, that world sucks, but still there's more things in it, at least.
Speaker 2:Did he build Star Wars? I don't know.
Speaker 1:I'm asking you You're the guy that saw it when you were a child.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he did that first Star Wars movie, and that first Star Wars movie is really great. But, then after that he involved lots and lots of other people and they conflated it and they built out of mythos And you know I mean. the thing about Star Wars is Star Wars exists on great design, great ship design, great costume design, not a prequel, so much though I mean green screen. No, but there's a lot of great design in those.
Speaker 1:Sure, but it all looks like a cartoon.
Speaker 2:Well, whatever that, you know what?
Speaker 1:Just spend the money. Build a set guy. I love the way it looks, but it needs to be real. I'm not an idiot.
Speaker 2:I was watching something on the Avengers thing and it's like, just when they're walking around, they've painted all those suits on every single character.
Speaker 1:That's intense.
Speaker 2:Yeah, Like you know, when they're walking to go time travel and and and Black Widow's wearing like the gray costume That costume is not real. None of that's real.
Speaker 1:That's wild, because those do look real.
Speaker 2:Yeah, they look real, but those are all digitally painted. They're all wearing the ping pong balls and all that They digitally paint up everything.
Speaker 1:That's incredible Yeah it's kind of. I mean I'm disappointed because just get it, just hire a fucking costume designer, let him make some costumes. These people need work everybody. No, you know what? Now I'm anti Marvel. Yeah, fuck you Marvel.
Speaker 2:He just turned on him. So basically, the premise is this is going to be about a love potion which immediately we're you know, we're in woke 2023 and we're just thinking about love potions and all the things that come with such a thing.
Speaker 1:Here's the thing Yeah, yes, 100%. I don't consider myself that woke, let's be honest. I'm a dim bulb. But right away I was like, oh no, this is that's what this movie's about. Forcing someone to love you against their will. Oh, that's not good. But here's the thing. The movie reinforces that. It's not only. It feels like they also know that it's problematic and they're like we're going to double down and make it even worse. There's a point where the bad guy is like if there is no love potion, there is no love. He's saying that there's no such thing as real love. You have to force someone to love you in order to get love. That's a very confusing message to send if this is a children's movie.
Speaker 2:One of the other things they said was when they were making this movie, they wanted to try to find the beauty in ugliness and weirdness and strangeness.
Speaker 1:So rape, the R word. Is that what they're talking about?
Speaker 2:No don't. They want to find the beauty in that.
Speaker 1:Tell me what a love potion is, then, because that's pretty much what it is.
Speaker 2:Well, we don't go there. But my point being is Don't we?
Speaker 1:Dan, the sister gets pretty hot and heavy. She like rides his staff at one point. It is confusing.
Speaker 2:Oh, so you're saying it's the other way around. It's like.
Speaker 1:Wow, because he makes her, He forces her to then want to. It's listen. this movie is fucked. I'll tell you that right now.
Speaker 2:So spoilers. By the end, the heroine Marianne and the bog king fall in love.
Speaker 1:Fall in love. I don't know about that.
Speaker 2:Well, they do fall. They do within the parameters of the story and things that are said.
Speaker 1:They tell me that that's what's happening. Okay, yes.
Speaker 2:The bog king is. He has broken teeth. Yeah, he has pointy things, he's always scowling, he's always miserable. He's not like this dark, magical presence.
Speaker 1:I mean, he's not the beast from Beauty and the Beast.
Speaker 2:The beast is like a snarling, angry, pissed off beast. That's a problem.
Speaker 1:Sure.
Speaker 2:And if Bell? just well, you can't have Bell fall in love because he turns into a man, doesn't he?
Speaker 1:Yes, he does.
Speaker 2:You can't have a big beast and a beautiful woman.
Speaker 1:You can. I bet you, if I go to the Internet I can find a bunch of it. Dan, You find a lot of it.
Speaker 2:But don't you think they could have designed the bog king as like something that was Let me Dan. I think they could have designed.
Speaker 1:They could have designed everybody a little bit different and not made everything so ugly. Every creature, person, thing is ugly in this movie, even the lead, like ticker bell ladies ugly, so ugly.
Speaker 2:She's, I wouldn't say she's so ugly.
Speaker 1:She's horrific.
Speaker 2:So, in other words, it makes sense that she comes together with the bog king.
Speaker 1:Yeah, i have no problem with that. They're both equally ugly in my book. They both look terrible, horrendous creatures.
Speaker 2:And then what about Sonny, Sonny the elf?
Speaker 1:Sonny looks weirdly. Human right.
Speaker 2:Is that just me? Well, he looks like a hobbit, Gornet.
Speaker 1:Oh, I was thinking like a gnome, but you're right. Yeah, you're actually right.
Speaker 2:But this is. You know. It's super interesting that they want to call him an elf, because elves like after Lord of the Rings, everybody's like. Elves are the fair folk, they're the beautiful, everything and Sonny and all the elves are like these.
Speaker 1:Well, they're like the Kebler's. They're like Kebler elves.
Speaker 2:That's what they reminded me of, except they're dark, brown and they look dirty and they look. I mean, it's Well, they're working the ground right.
Speaker 1:I don't know. I have no idea. I don't know what they do. I don't know what anybody does for a job in this kingdom.
Speaker 2:It's almost sort of racist how like unappealing they make Sonny.
Speaker 1:Sure, but guess what? Sonny's also the only character in the entire movie that can sing like an angel.
Speaker 2:Oh, you like to sing? Sonny's got a great voice. I like he's the only one that I liked.
Speaker 1:Okay, everybody else. I wanted to plug my ears, just like they do in the movie, which is we're getting all over the board and I apologize, but throughout the movie there's multiple jokes about people hating other people singing, but then they turn around and sing four seconds later, and I was just like it's fun. You shouldn't point that out in the movie, because I also hate everybody singing, so you're just reminding me how much everybody hates the people you've chosen to sing. It's bad, It's bad, it's bad. Everything about this movie is bad.
Speaker 2:So we start with Mary Ann who's Evan Rachel Wood.
Speaker 1:Yeah, very talented.
Speaker 2:She's doing a song. Only fools rush in. I can't help falling in love with you. And she's singing it to no one and we don't understand why she's singing it.
Speaker 1:That is correct, yeah.
Speaker 2:She accidentally goes into the dark forest, flies in there, because there's a thing in this movie where what they do is they always have characters to have something happening. They just have characters bump into stuff or they have characters fall over Or wander into the dark world somehow on accident.
Speaker 1:Let me tell you a quick story here, dan, if there was a light world and a dark world and that's where all the death was I'm pretty sure I would know exactly where that border is and never fucking cross it Never on accident, that's for sure.
Speaker 2:Well, more importantly, it's a really specific demarcation line. It's not like you're going to miss it. It's not like you're like. Oh whoa, i walked a mile into the dark place. I'm in trouble.
Speaker 1:It's like you'll see it from a mile away Like, oh, that's dark.
Speaker 2:Instantly, you know it's like one second.
Speaker 1:you're like, oh, I'm out of it, I'm in it, i'm out of it, i'm out of it, oh God.
Speaker 2:And so she we don't not know who she's singing about that she loves and she didn't. And this is the kind of songs that you have when someone you're going to, you're supposed to meet your dude, then you like walk away and then you start singing the song because now you're in love, because you've seen the person.
Speaker 1:You're thinking about it. Yeah, you're on cloud nine. You just met your bow.
Speaker 2:No, no no, she gets attacked by two goblins, by a couple of goblins, and then they because she wandered into the dark world, because she was singing her song or something right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so they sort of attack her and then she just sort of gets away and then they're like we better go tell the boss that someone came here, because if you get this special Primrose pedal, that's what you need to make the love potion, and the big the bog king, he makes sure to get them all so that nobody can make it to these potions.
Speaker 1:Who cares?
Speaker 2:I don't know. Here's the problem. This is setup.
Speaker 1:Tony Setup Here's no, no, i understand that this is what they're trying to set up, but my thing is she is clearly in love already. Right, she doesn't have the potion. She didn't use the potion. Love exists already, yes. How many people are really going for this love potion that he has to cut down? Exactly No one in the movie. Until a halfway in the movie is like oh shit, i want a potion. It doesn't make any sense. Dan Story wise zero plausibility.
Speaker 2:Yep, So bubububub.
Speaker 1:Also, they can't make it without the fairy. Wait, what Sugar plum?
Speaker 2:or Sugar plum fairy.
Speaker 1:Which is a very real thing, right From the rat dance musical.
Speaker 2:Sugar plum fairies dancing on your heads.
Speaker 1:Maybe it's from a song, i don't know, it doesn't matter. He has her captured, yep. So what are they going to do with the primrose? Nobody else can make the potion. No, i'm asking. I'm trying to get you to clarify the story of the movie that you made me watch last night because I don't understand.
Speaker 2:We're just setting up the mythology so that people can get deeper into it as time goes by.
Speaker 1:Well, i'm stuck, i'm already stuck.
Speaker 2:So we meet the bog king. He's like love is dangerous, and then he sort of almost starts a song.
Speaker 1:Almost. It's a fake out. guys, I know you wanted me to do it, but I'm not going to do it yet. Guess what, I didn't care. I didn't want him to start singing. I was hoping he didn't. I was like, oh good, great job.
Speaker 2:So his mom's there. She's sort of he's an insect, she's sort of a lizard-y thing, yeah.
Speaker 1:Does any of this make sense, Stan?
Speaker 2:I don't understand. And she just wants her son to find love, so she's going to do love connection stuff as things go, Which is very weird.
Speaker 1:They're because he's like I don't understand how they thought all this would make sense together. She seems very nice and very loving. I mean, he's supposedly this guy that kills everybody, Right.
Speaker 2:They say kills. They say kills people. They say kills a couple times.
Speaker 1:So I don't understand. he's got this super loving mother that just wants him to be happy and he's just like a grumposaurus because some woman he tried to force to love him didn't love him. I don't know man And yet. but he's also a huge softy later, so none of it makes any sense. I hate this movie, stan.
Speaker 2:I hate it. So now we meet Rowan, who's like well, he's not an elf, i guess he's another fairy, and he's like the male good looking fairy. How ugly is Rowan? Except for he's not.
Speaker 1:He's ugly as shit. I'm telling every single person and they keep talking about how handsome he is, and I just want to slap whoever designed it and be like if you want him to be handsome, make a fucking handsome. You can make him anything you want. You're drawing him. Why is he so ugly? It's not like you had to go out and find someone to cast while you still had monetary limitations, so I can't go get a brand pit, so I had to settle for someone slightly uglier. No, you drew him. You drew him and he looks like a fool.
Speaker 2:Here's Rowan. He's ugly. They're getting married. She doesn't let him see She's klutzy at the beginning of the show movie.
Speaker 1:Yes, you can call it a show, that's fine.
Speaker 2:Then that goes away for no reason.
Speaker 1:It doesn't make any sense, because she becomes like the fighter. She's like the graceful fighter. I don't know, maybe there's a training montage that we dropped somewhere.
Speaker 2:There is a training montage.
Speaker 1:Oh, did I just not pay attention? Yeah, that sounds all right.
Speaker 2:When she gets dumped or when she drops him, she gets angry, and so she learns how to fight.
Speaker 1:Oh, wow, Okay. Yeah, I totally missed our spoiler alert for everybody out there. I've been playing this game called Walkin W-A-L-K-E-N on my phone. I was deep into that by like halfway into this movie.
Speaker 2:I'm not going to lie to you It wasn't halfway, it was like the first 10 minutes of the movie.
Speaker 1:I was about six minutes into this movie. I checked on out.
Speaker 2:Training montage doesn't fix you being klutzy.
Speaker 1:Well, it shouldn't, because that's just kind of like inherent to your being. But I think it's great Good for her, for getting out of her awkward phase. You know Now why won't she let him see her? She's not in the wedding dress because her sister is like we got to go get dressed, dude. So, that I don't okay. Did you think did?
Speaker 2:you think Don was her sister when they first met.
Speaker 1:No, i only know that because of the end of the movie He thought she was her weird friend, right? Yeah, yeah, the kooky best friend, which is what she probably should have been the whole time, but that's fine.
Speaker 2:Do you want to talk about Don's hair?
Speaker 1:I don't even remember Don's hair.
Speaker 2:It's blonde, right, it's this weird blonde spiky thing Ugliest hair I've ever seen on a character.
Speaker 1:Because she's kind of the slutty one, you know. So she's got to be a little more loosey-goosey.
Speaker 2:Marianne asked do you think he loves me?
Speaker 1:And then we do the crazy in love song, And then why are we doing the crazy in love song after we already did the fool's rush? What did we sing at the beginning? Whatever she's saying at the beginning, why is she doing that same bit twice?
Speaker 2:So that she can duet with Roland, and then she can discover that Roland is going there to make out with his side action, who looks just like the main girl They look so much alike.
Speaker 1:Little cuter maybe? Well, listen, they're all very ugly. This is a very low-end scale that you're debating on, but yeah, i guess so. It was just weird, because not that I condone this sort of activity, but I feel like if you're going to cheat, wouldn't you want to cheat on someone that's different and not the exact same as what you already have? I don't know.
Speaker 1:More importantly, maybe not cheat the day of your marriage, the day of the marriage, and also 20 feet away from where you just were hanging out with your fiance. Maybe I'm just throwing that out there.
Speaker 2:Maybe do it in a house or room. Do they have houses, Stan?
Speaker 1:Under a mushroom, maybe Under a mushroom's good Yeah, go to the dark world. Nobody goes in there, just fool around in there. I mean, that's got to be what you do as a kid, right?
Speaker 2:Yeah, so she cries and then flies around and bumps into things.
Speaker 1:Just a ton of things. See how she's playing ping-pong with her body.
Speaker 2:And she tells Dawn that the wedding's off and we get another song. What do you do? What do you get when you fall in love?
Speaker 1:I've heard this one, so we're three for three, but we start our ratio starts dropping drastically as we get further into this movie.
Speaker 2:And then this is when she becomes a badass. During this song, she fights with the three little sprites and she's now a badass.
Speaker 1:I was totally paying attention, i guess I just didn't realize. I don't know. I don't know what happened. That's okay, because this is. is this before or after her dad talks to her? Must be before.
Speaker 2:I used to before the dad talks to her, because basically she cancels the wedding just by telling Dawn and then there are literal zero repercussions.
Speaker 1:Zero repercussions.
Speaker 2:There's no guests, angry The dad. I don't think the dad even gets angry at her.
Speaker 1:Okay, yeah, i'm sure you're right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, whole you know like if you cancel a wedding, that is.
Speaker 1:That is the next scene. It's expensive.
Speaker 2:It's expensive.
Speaker 1:Yeah, But instead we we fast forward a couple months at least, maybe more.
Speaker 2:I don't know, i have no idea. I if I assume this whole thing took place in the course of three days but I could be right.
Speaker 1:I never heard of change her eye shadow and become emo, so we're, we're watching this show this morning.
Speaker 2:Oh, the shrink, shrinking show on Apple, oh yeah.
Speaker 1:Is that good?
Speaker 2:by the way, todd really liked it. We watched the first episode and it was kind of weird, okay. But there's a point at which, like, he comes into the house and things are happening and I'm like, who is that? Who's that character? She's like, oh, this is the past, that's his dead wife. And I was like, how do you know that? And she's like, well, he's wearing different clothes and he's a different haircut. Oh, okay, i didn't notice any of those things.
Speaker 1:So just, you know details, just physical details here.
Speaker 2:So when you say somebody changed their eye shadow, i'm like that is not a thing I'm going to ever see.
Speaker 1:She did because she was like bright and bubbly and she was, you know, makeup free in the beginning, and now she's like got dark eye shadow on and her hair's a little different. She's very punk rock now. And yet still ugly, so you can't win them all.
Speaker 2:Okay, so we meet this other Dawn's hanging out with this thing. That's an elf, i have to write that in, because I thought it was a troll who's very hideous.
Speaker 1:Oh, okay, sure.
Speaker 2:And then he's in love. His name is Sonny, and then we find his name out about 10, 10 minutes later.
Speaker 1:We don't get his name ever Not at the top Yep.
Speaker 2:Dawn is obsessed with cute, good looking guys. She has no interest in Sonny. Sonny's in love with her, and you know that's going to be the premise of it. later on, dawn is going to fall in love with Sonny for literally no reason.
Speaker 1:She doesn't even fall in love, dan. She hugs him one time. She goes Sonny, i love you. It's like wait what? What happened? No, i don't understand. How did this happen?
Speaker 2:It doesn't make any sense at all Well Sonny what it should have had to do. Some grand gesture of heroic Some heroic.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's great, dan. That's narratively wonderful stuff, but nope, they just happen, it's just a switch that is flicked at some point and maybe she actually accidentally got dosed with the love potion and that's what happened. Bonus dust In the sequel you find out that she slowly comes out of it and is like what has been happening? I've been kept captive for the last three years by a man I don't love. That's a good sequel.
Speaker 2:I'm going to write that. So we do, we do, we do, don't worry about it saying don't worry, and then they get attacked by a lizard.
Speaker 1:It's tough because I know this movie came out in 2015. Ted Lasso just did an episode where Hannah Wadding is what her name Waddingham Sing's, don't worry about a thing, And she's so talented. So hearing this, I was like what the fuck is going on here? These people can't do anything. Took two pencils instead.
Speaker 2:I wish.
Speaker 1:I could have. I don't have any pencils. Thank God in the house or I'd be dead.
Speaker 2:So then Marianne sees them be attacked by the lizard, and so she just attacks, and then she just goes and scares the lizard away.
Speaker 1:And the least scary growl of all time, by the way. Here's my problem with this scene, dan. So Blondie and Sonny are just talking. Blondie, she has wings. I don't know if you've noticed this. She can fly. The lizard pops out. This lady just books it. She leaves Sonny with his tiny little legs to run away. As she flies away and gets away free and clear. Just pick them up.
Speaker 1:No she she, she loves him. But she loves him. Yeah, she totally loves him. She left him to die without a second thought. And then the sister comes in, also doesn't pick Sonny up. She flies around and hits the lizard. Eight seconds later, when he's in the dark world, she picks him up with one hand and pulls him into the light world. She could have picked him up at any time. Nobody just picked him up and flew away. The lizard can't fly. Lizard, lizard, it's a big lizard.
Speaker 2:That's. I think that's why I'm like I think maybe one of those stupid bugs movies, don't think I attacked my bird?
Speaker 1:Yeah, because it makes way more sense. You can't get away from that shit. That's dumb. I hate this movie.
Speaker 2:So Sonny, marianna, tex, sonny, yeah, sonny roll. I think he rolls into the dark forest because he's an idiot. Yeah, I guess the little dum-dum And he finds one of the pedals, but instead of taking it with him, which, like if you found something valuable, you just put it in here.
Speaker 1:But is it valuable? Dan I honestly don't know, because nobody is just out collecting them to then sell them. You want to talk about a great business opportunity. Before the bog king can cut them all down, just go out and collect them and be like I'll sell it to you for a billion dollars. This is the love post is the most important thing in the world.
Speaker 2:Well, so what he does is he rolls it up and then sticks it under a root.
Speaker 1:Do my save it for later, just in case I need it. Not going to bring it with me, but just in case.
Speaker 2:Easier this heavy, heavy pedal. Just put it right here. No, just leave it right here, right next to the dark forest.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, great stuff.
Speaker 2:So we get back and we find out that it's time for the ball. I'm like did we have a wedding? Yeah, this guy throws parties all the time.
Speaker 1:This king has no money left because he spends all of his money.
Speaker 2:Marianne, I'm too old. And then we have Roland come in there and Roland does a song at the ball where he's on his knees.
Speaker 1:You're skipping over a very important part of this film, which is where the dad sets it up, that Roland is there And is like Hey, i know that you had a tough few times, you know. period of time after the Roland. What did he say? He said a very important word. He wrote something down Misunderstanding the Roland misunderstanding where he put his tongue down another woman's throat. but let's not think about that. And he's like you should forgive him. You should go back with the guy that cheated on you.
Speaker 2:Why, barney, you have to put some incentive, like you need to roll in Mary Roland for this reason.
Speaker 1:We need to unite two people or something, Anything other than the fact that this dad is like I don't care that he sleeps around and he'll make you emotionally depressed all the time and he'll basically make your life a living hell. You should be with him for no reason. For no reason.
Speaker 2:So he does an on my knees song. Her song is what doesn't get to kill you, baby, make you stronger.
Speaker 1:Let me and here's the sir She's not, you're singing it just like she did.
Speaker 2:I'm the, i'm the white male.
Speaker 1:Beyonce. So this is a Kelly Clarkson song, right.
Speaker 2:Oh, I'm the white Kelly.
Speaker 1:Clarkson. Say what you want about Kelly Clarkson. She can. she's got some pipes. You need to pick songs that your people can sing or cast people and maybe in the audition be like, hey, let's hear some of these songs sung by some of the most talented singers in the world And then, if you can't do it, don't do it. She sounds like a child trying to sing this song and it's very disappointing.
Speaker 2:So rolling. It's the idea of the love potion. He hooks up with Sonny for no known reasons.
Speaker 1:Well, because he can manipulate Sonny into doing it for him, because he's a lazy piece of shit, that's true.
Speaker 2:Roland cries, and so his crying makes Sonny want to do it.
Speaker 1:Doesn't make any sense, because he cries for three seconds at the top and then the rest of their conversation, doesn't cry again, and at the end of it Sonny's like I'll do it If you just stop crying. What?
Speaker 2:does he?
Speaker 1:hasn't cried for four minutes, guy, it doesn't make any sense.
Speaker 2:And that's the thing is, everybody cries in this movie and that's always like Oh, he cried, so something so well, well, i do something or something good happening. Somebody's crying. Sonny goes, he goes against the pedal and he goes into the dark forest. We get some doors when you're strange, but just just some strings underneath.
Speaker 1:It's my favorite song that they use in the movie and we don't get to sing it at all. I love that song so much.
Speaker 2:When the bog king does it, don't mess with me song. I don't think I knew what that song was.
Speaker 1:I've never heard it before in my life. No, i should have looked these up just to know, have like an idea of who's saying them, but I didn't.
Speaker 2:And then Sonny meets the imp. You want to talk about the imp, Tony. What's an imp Is that the little free white guy, Oh yeah.
Speaker 1:They're the cute little rabbit.
Speaker 2:Only thing interesting in this movie.
Speaker 1:Yeah, i mean, we don't really use it, we don't utilize it enough, like I love the idea and his whole point is just like he wants to spread the dust to everyone. Why, why is he doing it? I want to learn a little bit more about his. Is it mischievous?
Speaker 2:Well, this this movie sort of based on the midsummer's nights, correct Summer. Dream It's a midsummer's night dream Midsummer's night, dream evening dream. So I think he's supposed to be puck.
Speaker 1:He is. No, i mean I, i get it.
Speaker 2:I'm just saying Can you say that?
Speaker 1:in this movie, Dan I you're. You're asking your audience, which I think is children right, That's who should be this for to have already seen a midsummer's night dream. That's not going to happen, So you're going to have to explain to them what this character is. Stupid children, Stupid, You got. You got these dumb children out here trying to watch this movie. They're not going to know the history of it. Now, do you ever do a midsummer's night? I did.
Speaker 2:I'm being Oberyn Yeah.
Speaker 1:So I'm technically the father, you're the father.
Speaker 2:So now did you want the daughter to marry the asshole?
Speaker 1:I don't think that's what happens And I don't remember. It's been a long time. This was high school that I was in.
Speaker 2:I was in a Shakespeare club at high school by the way, i'm sure I'm talking about this, you sure it's about that the other day. A little bit, just a little bit, we want no cover.
Speaker 1:I'll tease it. I'll tease it over the next couple of years, you know, because people are just dying for this content. You wore a lot of a lot of hose, a lot of hose, all sorts of pantyhose, leader hose. You know all sorts of hoses. Did you have to go?
Speaker 2:like pantyhose shopping with your mom.
Speaker 1:You're comfortable with that, absolutely. I'm not ashamed of that at all. Well, not even a little bit. You want to hear one that I am a little ashamed of? I had this audition back in college where they wanted me to be in the shower. By the way, i booked this commercial, so it's a good ending, but a weird middle. So I went to the first audition and they're like okay, now take your shirt off. So I took my shirt off and I did the audition And they're like could you come back for the callback and get ready your back hair, which I can't do by myself? So in between it was a Wednesday and a Friday. On Thursday night I was like hey, mom, i need you to shave my back. So as a 23-year-old man, i had to sit in the shower and have my mom shave my back. But I booked the commercial, so worked out real nicely. I booked the shit out of it, guys.
Speaker 2:Oh my God. So yeah, so Sonny's there with the amp, the amp is cool, and then somehow he figures out that the amp knows where his trigger pump fairy is.
Speaker 1:They make it seem like they're communicating, but they're not. The amp isn't doing anything. He's like wait, you know where she is. It's kind of like when they do Lassie, but even worse, right, where is?
Speaker 2:he, he's falling down the well Right like what. It's a deep well, tap, tap, tap to the northeast. Tap, tap, tap three miles. Ah, thank you, lassie, you're good.
Speaker 1:And I'm off. Oh, it doesn't make any sense. I love it.
Speaker 2:Mary Ann's at the Spring Dance is soon. So we've had a failed marriage. We've had a ball.
Speaker 1:Ball, and now we have a dance coming in.
Speaker 2:It's like it felt like Sonny just left a minute ago.
Speaker 1:Now we somehow maybe we have a dance every night, every other night, i think every other is probably because he got to clean up in between.
Speaker 2:And then the dad's like you need to look out for your sister And I'm like wait, mary Ann needs to look out for Don. Why?
Speaker 1:Yeah well, so I'll tell you why because she's too promiscuous. So he's got two daughters. One of them is too much of a prude and he wants her to loosen up and get with the guy that cheated on her. And then his other daughter is fucking everybody and he's like maybe let her drain her in a little bit, because women be crazy. That's basically what this movie is about is that ladies are crazy.
Speaker 2:So Sonny has it gets down there. He goes to the thing in the bog kinks. It's a castle place with skull.
Speaker 1:It's very precarious because it falls down pretty easily.
Speaker 2:He gets this room with all these cages and you're like, ah, sugar pump fairies in one of these cages. But no, that's not where they keep her. They keep her in this this ball of miniaturizing light blue ball which miniaturizes. So if you put your hand through the ear, hand becomes small because she's large, but she's there and she also.
Speaker 1:It's like. I like the idea. It doesn't make any sense, but I would love to put some stuff in it.
Speaker 2:Different appendages put it right in that blue light, see what's going on.
Speaker 1:Maybe a head shrink your head. That's funny, it doesn't seem safe.
Speaker 2:She's fine, She's like set me free and I'll give you the potion. And then we have a love is strange song. I don't know what song that was.
Speaker 1:Yep Never heard that song either.
Speaker 2:And then we have like let's put in a little comical thing where the mom is bringing in all these weird insects and monsters to try to be the girlfriend for the king. I thought some of the insect and monster designs were kind of cool.
Speaker 1:Yeah sure I don't know, It's just. I couldn't get past. how weird it all was Didn't make any sense. How long has he been angry?
Speaker 2:Since he got jilted.
Speaker 1:I understand that. When did that happen, Dan? I want a timeframe because I have several questions.
Speaker 2:It happened in the flashback.
Speaker 1:I'm gonna slap you right in the face. Here's the thing, dan. Before he got jilted which is a great word, by the way, that was very nice Before that happened, was the dark world still the dark world, or did he create the dark world? So it was always a dark world? He's always been a bog king, so he was always bad. Then why does it matter that he got jilted?
Speaker 2:He was happy mad.
Speaker 1:He enjoyed being mad. He enjoyed being nefarious. None of this makes any sense. I can't get past it.
Speaker 2:So the imp wants the potion. I guess she made the potion.
Speaker 1:Did she make the potion? Well, it's not a potion first of all, they keep calling it a potion but one. she just turned the pedal into dust that you sprinkle on people.
Speaker 2:Not a potion.
Speaker 1:But it's not a potion. You wouldn't call that a potion If I handed you glitter. You're not like oh, this is a potion, Potion, Not shun.
Speaker 2:So imp wants the potion. Sonny gets the potion, sonny escapes My king's angry The elves are now having the spring dance And so Sonny gets a song. He gets the One Day I Love You song. One Day I Love You. I don't know what that song is.
Speaker 1:I don't know any of them.
Speaker 2:And slowly the bad guys have left, because they know the potion's out there, and so then they slowly take over the band.
Speaker 1:They know because the fairy lady told them immediately. He didn't even torture her. He was just like, hey, where's he going? She's like, oh, he's going to the dance right now. It starts in 20 minutes. If you hurry, you can catch him. Why would she just tell him the information?
Speaker 2:Because she's the motivator of everything that happens in the movie. So she has to make sure everybody shows up where they're supposed to, so that the things in the movie can happen.
Speaker 1:I guess you're right about that. It makes perfect sense now that you say it like that. So the bad guys take over the band, and the only person that gets potioned is Dawn, and then she gets put in a bag, and so you're like oh, she's put in a bag Before she sees anybody, because the quote unquote potion, the first person you see after you get sprinkled with the glitter is who you love.
Speaker 2:So we know that she's going to fall in love with the Bog King. Of course She's going to get put in a bag And then by King shows up and he does a rock and roll. I've been insulted. It's not a song.
Speaker 1:I know I don't believe that it's a real song. That would be a dumb real song.
Speaker 2:But I don't know.
Speaker 1:I don't know Just listening to those words. That can't be a real song.
Speaker 2:It's possible.
Speaker 1:It is possible, i should try to look it up while you're gibber jabbering.
Speaker 2:He's saying give me the potion, and give me the potion. Just give me the potion, i'll give you back to her, But you got to do it before the moon sets.
Speaker 1:Before moon down, which I've never heard before, but I like it because it's like sundown, but it's with the moon.
Speaker 2:So Roland was hiding. Now he comes out and he's like I'll go save him, but you got to give me the army. And they're like Kings, like take the army. And then Mary Ann's like I'll go do it myself. And then she takes off, and then everyone yells at Sonny because he's an idiot. And then he tries to rally the elves and only this one elf says okay, i'll go. So which is?
Speaker 1:yeah, i don't know, it doesn't make any sense.
Speaker 2:So while King's gotten back to his castle, he says bring me the prisoner. They opened it up and boom. Now we found the most annoying song Human beings can sing Sugar pie, honey bunch.
Speaker 1:Sugar pie, honey bunch.
Speaker 2:And then she is falling in Dawn, is falling in love with the bog king, and then she does that song and you want to kill yourself.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, and you know, i don't blame you.
Speaker 2:Mary Ann does a song on coming and she trips on stuff and the alarm is raised Yep, yep, yep, yep. The imp has gotten ahold of the potion. He's being chased by Sonny. They crash and get wrapped up. You know one of those classic crashes where you crash and then you go Classic.
Speaker 1:It's classic.
Speaker 2:And then you're all tied up like this, and then here, So, here's my question.
Speaker 1:I need to just ask you about the physics of this right? So they have one rope, essentially between the two of them. Is that what I'm to believe? Sure, and then they're both trying to rope things right. But if they were to succeed in roping them, they are connected. So how was that plan ever going to work in the first place? It's not like you are holding on to one end of the rope, you throw the other end and then you pull it back. You're both throwing the ends of the rope. The rope is gone If you throw it technically. I don't understand, dan.
Speaker 1:I don't understand why the Okay, i get it, i get it.
Speaker 2:That's what happens to me.
Speaker 1:People just need to think about the little things that they do in a movie to just make sure they make the basic amount of sense.
Speaker 2:It's funny, it's really funny, it's not?
Speaker 1:funny. It's not funny at all, dan, it's not funny.
Speaker 2:What you're doing is funny.
Speaker 1:What you're doing is funny, what they did is not funny.
Speaker 2:So then the imp doses the lizard, so the lizard is in love with Sunny. I like that. I thought that was a nice dose.
Speaker 1:That was like you and the few You like that. Oh boy, it's weird.
Speaker 2:You don't want to see the lizard trying to impregnate.
Speaker 1:Sunny. Well, i mean, i don't want to not see it, but at the same time I don't want to see it. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:I was like you know if you're going to put a video on a lizard having sex with an elf in an elf, now that you've promised?
Speaker 1:it. I'll probably watch it If you would ask me straight up. Hey, would you ever want to watch a lizard make love with a little? What is he again? An elf.
Speaker 2:With an elf.
Speaker 1:I'd be like no, probably not. But if you came to me and you were like I have a video of an elf and a lizard getting it on, i'd watch it. My answer is then yes. Now I'm like, well, if you already got it, if you're telling me that it exists, i do want to see it. But if you're asking me if I want to make it, i'm like no that's weird.
Speaker 2:Oh man, okay, mom, now we do another whole scene where the mom brings up more suitors and we do a Harry Nelson can't live without you. And Harry Nelson rolled over and is great.
Speaker 1:It's great. You don't know who Harry Nelson is to you? I sure don't, but you know who? I do know who they are, now that I've just looked it up.
Speaker 2:Deep Purple is the name of the band.
Speaker 1:And that is who sings the song Mistreated, that the Boggings sings Mistreated. So I'm going to listen to that as soon as we're done.
Speaker 2:Yeah, deep Purple, that's a real band. More imp chasing the lizard eats. Somebody Who does the lizard eat?
Speaker 1:The little bunny rabbit that has the bottle and they're like I'll let him because and it's sunny, is like I'll tell the lizard to let you go because it loves me if you give us a potion, the amp eats the amp. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is my one of my two laughs in the movie Dan. Yeah, the sunny gives him the ultimatum. I guess him may not be appropriate.
Speaker 2:It gives them the ultimatum.
Speaker 1:Is that what I said? This is an ultimatum Palladium, the ultimatum of hey, i'll let you out if you give us a thing, and the imp sticks its arms out in the lips and does like the thinking pose, but with the lizard's mouth, and that was very funny. I just I want to give them credit where credit's due. They had one good joke.
Speaker 2:And during this we have like 25 seconds of cheap tricks thing called love, one of the greatest songs of all time 100 percent.
Speaker 1:But do you not? if you buy it, do you buy the whole thing? Maybe they could only afford a little piece of it. Is that a thing that can happen?
Speaker 2:We have 15 seconds of your song, so we're only giving me a thousand bucks.
Speaker 1:Yeah, what if they're like how much are you starting? Like, well, it's 10 grand per track And he's like I've only got $1,000. Can I have one tenth of your song?
Speaker 2:So the army is marching. What song are they, army, marching to?
Speaker 1:Probably the ants go marching in, yeah, yeah, one by one.
Speaker 2:No, they say they go to Lady Gaga.
Speaker 1:Oh right, no, I do remember that now. Yeah, what was?
Speaker 2:the song Which one See. I had it there for a second and I lost it. Sing it.
Speaker 1:Sing it.
Speaker 2:It's bad romance.
Speaker 1:It's bad romance. You don't know the one word. I think the people out there are really going to like that rendition, Dan. I think we really crushed that.
Speaker 2:I think we killed it. Lady Gaga's like I need those guys.
Speaker 1:We're going to get a phone call.
Speaker 2:Get them on the phone.
Speaker 1:It's going to be great.
Speaker 2:Sonny shows up to the army, gives Roland the potion And we do this whole thing, where now he looks at them and is like you're in love with Don, And we're like, how would it be Jumpy seven? fifth thing I know we won. He's like yes, i am in love with Don.
Speaker 1:Really You're telling Roland that of all people, I don't know man Because this movie doesn't make any sense.
Speaker 2:The Bog King demands that all the lovers, because the imp has gone and made turtles fall in love with squirrels and insect bugs fall in love with golf carts and just all kinds of weird shit.
Speaker 1:Golf carts There's no golf carts in this movie, Don't be confused everybody.
Speaker 2:So Mary Ann follows them and then she cracks through the window and she attacks the Bog King and we get the straight on for you duet between the two of them.
Speaker 1:And during this first duet the mom appears and is like, finally he's in love. What?
Speaker 2:What's happening? At one point, one of them sings the line and I think Mary Ann goes. What does that even mean? So you're commenting that your own movie doesn't know how to use the songs that it's being wrote.
Speaker 1:I picked the wrong song here, but I really like this song, so let's just keep going.
Speaker 2:It's like George Lucas, is an idiot. Why did you pick this song And tell me about how the battle ends, Tony?
Speaker 1:I think they just both get tired. Isn't that what happens? They're just like whew boy. Should we go get drinks?
Speaker 2:And the Bog King's like OK, just kill me.
Speaker 1:Yeah, oh yes, i should push the sword. And he's like just do it, i don't even. I'm so tired right now, i could literally die.
Speaker 2:So they're like man. Instead, we'll go see Don, and so we go through all the lovers, everybody's like, yeah, they all sing horribly.
Speaker 1:I don't know why that was a joke. Is that a joke? I don't know.
Speaker 2:I don't know. Then he's like let's work together and have to get stuff for fairy. I don't know what that means.
Speaker 1:I don't know what that means either, Dan.
Speaker 2:So the mom sets up the big love dinner for the two of them with like all the hearts, and they're all like they go and they do like the love dinner.
Speaker 1:Yeah, because he's already a softie about it, like he's not a mean bad guy, he's just kind of bitter And as soon as someone shows any interest in him, he's back. He's back to being a wonderful, loving guy with ugly teeth. Yeah, teeth is just a hard thing for me. Teeth listen, teeth are tough, and I don't want to be rude, like I understand, not everyone has the money for your dental work and stuff. It's just it's hard. It's hard because you see him a lot, yeah, and they kind of accentuate him.
Speaker 2:It's like you know.
Speaker 1:it's just like poor guy You feel for this guy Again, you drew him, so you can just draw him a little bit better. Yeah, it's weird.
Speaker 2:And then they, over the love dinner, they both realize that they both hate love. And then they bring up the sugar pulp fairy and she's like the only antidote for the love potion is the one thing more powerful than the potion. So the only thing that's the antidote is the thing that's more powerful than the potion, which is not a riddle, and they couldn't figure it out.
Speaker 1:It's not a riddle, though. No, it's not a riddle. She's just telling them the answer.
Speaker 2:Well, she's she's, she's positing a thing. It's like well sure you know, if you can figure out what's more powerful than the potion, then you'll have the thing that's more powerful than the potion It's like. well, how are we supposed to figure that out, unless some? it's just a riddle.
Speaker 1:I know immediately. Oh, did you really? You didn't know, it was true, love.
Speaker 2:No, I had never know anything. I'm the worst.
Speaker 1:I didn't know I didn't realize he changed his haircut and clothes. I admit I'm the absolute worst.
Speaker 2:I will be just about fooled by anything.
Speaker 1:I love that story, i know some plot stuff We've been watching.
Speaker 2:Sure, we'll talk about that. Oh, okay, the army approaches the bog King's castle. It doesn't even have a name. Usually you get places names. You name things in your world so that you can talk about them.
Speaker 1:Right, yep, that makes perfect sense. Not in this movie, they don't. There's not a lot of talking in general in this movie, which is good because the dialogue is atrocious. So we.
Speaker 2:He has to tell the story to figure out what the antidote is. The bog King fell in love with this lizard, or something and then he gave her the potion It was.
Speaker 1:I thought it was more of like a frog type lady. And here's the problem, here's my problematic, here's my problem with it Is it? they show the woman that he fell in love with and our lead character goes eww, what a bitch. Who does The lead girl? Oh, marianne. Yeah, marianne, she just keeps burry like putting this woman down that he was in love with. It's horrible.
Speaker 2:If you're trying, to make everything not about looks, then don't make it about looks.
Speaker 1:But everything is about looks, even in the beginning oh shoot, roland was uh, said something to Marianne before all the stuff happened and he's like, oh, you could get killed or, worse, be horribly disfigured or something like that. So it is all about looks.
Speaker 2:If you make. You know, and I mean I do believe in the Shrek movie they kind of deal with that. I don't remember that well, but they sort of talk about that as like she's okay Be. You know, like you gotta be okay with who you are, you gotta be. And if you're going to set up everything to sort of lead to that, then you know you got to make Marianne maybe not think she's super hot. Or you know, because you know, if you ask Marianne, are you super hot, she'd be like yes, i'm super hot, oh yeah, she definitely is into herself.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yes. And guess what? She's super ugly, so it's weird. But so for her, for having the confidence.
Speaker 2:So we find out that the only way to cure the potion is for the person to be actually in love?
Speaker 1:Yeah, Yeah, makes perfect sense.
Speaker 2:And then they do a little more talk and then she sort of Marianne talks about the Roland thing went wrong, And then wait.
Speaker 1:You know what, dan? It doesn't make sense. Let me ask you a question. Okay, ask me a question. I've dosed you with the love potion. Oh, tony, tony, tony, exactly.
Speaker 2:So you're going to me Tony. If somebody else I want to shave you back here every day. No, no, i keep it.
Speaker 1:Now, let's do it, i keep it now I don't know if you can see that but, it's Great, i'm full bear.
Speaker 1:But if somebody else comes along to talk to you, you're not going to give them the time of day because you're so in love with me, so in love with me. So how would somebody ever fall in love with somebody else while they're in the potion? to get the antidote, the only way that it works is how they do it in the movie, which is the person has to already be in love and not get affected. But that's not an antidote. That's like a defense mech, like that's. This movie doesn't understand what it's writing.
Speaker 2:BK says he's sorry, mark King says he's sorry about Don Never trust anybody. And then he sees, he sees Mary Ann's sexy wings.
Speaker 1:Is that what it is?
Speaker 2:She unfolds her sexy wings from behind and he's just like Oh whoa, his wings are like horrible dragon-dry wings with holes in them. Like, make him at least a noble creature, i guess that's the thing. Just make him evil, but make him have a thing Make him have powerful, dragon-dry wings.
Speaker 1:My favorite things are when my bad guys are very sexy. I love that. I love a sexy bad boy.
Speaker 2:And you can make him. You don't have to make him confident necessarily, but make him Well, because he's been jilted.
Speaker 1:He's been jilted, so he's lost his confidence. This is about him refinding his confidence.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and you know, like, do it in face acting, you know where you're, like, his mouth is like this, But then when he's in love with her, he sees her wings, he's all.
Speaker 1:This doesn't look like love.
Speaker 2:This looks like lost Dan, i'll tell you right now, that's Same thing. Then I wrote he catches her fall.
Speaker 1:Does she trip again? I don't know. She probably just trips and he probably catches her.
Speaker 2:So now we have the We have the Nave Sake song. Elo Strange Magic, elo my number one childhood band, still probably one of my favorite bands.
Speaker 1:I love.
Speaker 2:ELO more than anything.
Speaker 1:What else did they sing Dan? What else did they sing Tony? Was that a bad question? I'm sorry.
Speaker 2:Just go check out the Out of the Blue album, greatest album humankind has ever made. Wow, there's just so many. Jeff Linz, just the songster of all times Wow, he did all The movie Zanadu. He did all the music for that. I love Zanadu Okay.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's all ELO.
Speaker 2:There might be a couple non-ELO songs in there, but it's ELO. Did the separate? Okay, all right, i mean. Yeah.
Speaker 1:ELO.
Speaker 2:I mean there are no Huey Lewis in the news but it's fine, dan, this is probably the best part of the movies, when they sort of are falling in love and going through his dark kingdom and seeing the beauty of it. And they do a decent job of it.
Speaker 2:There's one centipede that goes by and I was like, okay, that's a cool centipede, sure, sure. If he'd have been designed off of that centipede, i'd have been like, okay, i can see her wanted to get with all those hands. You know, all those hands, all those hands.
Speaker 1:Dan Goodsell loves some hands.
Speaker 2:Mmm, these shows are centipedes. He takes her to the. You want to talk about the green bubble chamber, or what would you call that chamber, tony?
Speaker 1:I don't even know what that is.
Speaker 2:There are all these green lights that look like drops that hung on strings, Oh yeah.
Speaker 1:You don't even remember these parts. All I remember is them jumping over the plants. that, what is this? Venus fly traps.
Speaker 2:Yeah, oh, he catches her on the. She's jumping from Venus fly traps that she trips and he catches her. Well, she was showing off.
Speaker 1:She was doing like flips and shit She should have fell on. But here's, oh that's, but here's the thing. She's got wings, dan. Why did he need to catch her? if she falls up The thing, she just flies. She could just fly right back up to him. This is Stephen, so he looks out there and he sees the army and he's all like you played me, which is a fair assumption, i guess, but I don't know.
Speaker 2:You got me to leave my castle. I guess it is a castle.
Speaker 1:That's a good point. He calls it a castle.
Speaker 2:We should call it a castle, and somebody says oh, you two are having a lover's tiff. Maybe Roland says that. Yeah, i think Roland says that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that sounds about right.
Speaker 2:Sonny is snuck down to the bottom. He lets all the lover animals go, which is like six creatures. Roland and the bobkink fight And grabs Don, and then somehow the army like the three guys in the army have done something to make the entire bog kinks castle just collapse crumble, it just crumbles it's like explosives. It didn't do anything. No, it's like jenga do anything.
Speaker 1:They pulled out one pebble and then the whole thing fell down.
Speaker 2:So not great, not great construction well, not great movie construction, because nobody does anything to make this happen.
Speaker 1:Well, dan, that is not the first time we've had that scenario. This movie is is made terribly. Every decision is wrong, but it was pretty funny.
Speaker 2:I did laugh pretty hard when it fell down, because it doesn't make any sense and i mean this is the point at which sonny should have saved don and don realizes that sonny loves her.
Speaker 1:That is correct.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that doesn't happen, though, so don't confuse the people out there and then, but bog kink falls, saving dog, so bog kink falls to his death, saving well yeah, he stops.
Speaker 1:There's like a skull of some sort and they're running out and he holds the teeth up or something, and then the whole thing falls into what i don't really understand. Because shouldn't the castle have been built on ground?
Speaker 2:is that how you build?
Speaker 2:something you build the castle on top of this thing. That leads to chasm, so no one can sneak up on the castle. They have to like, do like the, you know. You have to do like the um, you know the allied forces. Where you hire your Clint Eastwood, the Eiger sanction, you know, because he's like a mountain climber and so he's like going to climb up the, the, the sheer cliff wall, and then sneak in and knife all the nazis, nazis, knife, knife, knife yikes, yikes, nazis, look out, wait, why am i cheering for the nazis?
Speaker 2:no, no, get him clint, sorry come on i got confused by the word he's cheering for the nazis over i've never seen this movie.
Speaker 1:I got confused. What are?
Speaker 2:you doing? why are you cheering for the nazis? what are you doing?
Speaker 1:i just i thought that clint was being a bad guy, but he was being the good guy. He's a mountain climber all right um because all mountain climbers are good guys. I love it.
Speaker 2:So something has happened. So what happens? everyone starts crying yeah, because the castle fell its face had. Suddenly starts singing. Don't worry about a thing. And don falls in love with sunny because he's singing. Bobby mcfarran, don't worry about a thing, that's everything gonna be all right nailed it and then bud kink just flies up because he's alive yeah, but his arm is hurt.
Speaker 1:He's got a little boo boo on his arm arm. You don't remember that. He's like ow, my arm, owie, owie.
Speaker 2:It's basically what he says rolling, then potions mary an, and then mary an starts singing the sugar pie, honey blanch, and then she punches roland and then bog king and mary an are in love yeah, they are gonna do it so hard and it almost, that almost worked for me. It was like i was right on the edge, where i was like oh, this is nice, i don't know what nice, but fine, fine, i just wish that he, you know that you're just that you had some, some transition.
Speaker 2:Maybe it didn't have to be fit, you know, just expression-wise, but he's still just kind of like sure you know it's like it's kind of it's kind of like if you fell in love with smeagol and, you know, fell in love with golem and in lord of the rings, you'd just be like, how did i fall in love with this guy?
Speaker 1:what? what does the matter with me?
Speaker 2:then we have a song i know something about love is a big group number, and then someone sings wild thing oh, mary, an flies down and starts doing wild thing yeah, because they're gonna do it.
Speaker 1:They're gonna do it so hard. Now here's my question about the wild thing song dan. Why does it all the sudden turn psychedelic and like it's got like tight eyes flying around? we've got these patterns it goes on kaleidoscope kaleidoscope, that's the word. What is happening? that doesn't fit anything. That's happened previously, in the last hour 45. Why is this happening now?
Speaker 2:yes, this movie is directed by a sound designer well, there you go maybe don't do that anymore.
Speaker 1:Guys, maybe don't hire sound designers to direct. I don't know. I don't want to say that as a blanket term. I retract my statement. I'm sure some of them could be great directors this one, not a great director uh, what's his name?
Speaker 2:michael geochino, who's like a composers, now director. He did the werewolf by night thing on disney, uh plus, which was great.
Speaker 1:I loved that. See, i i'm glad i retracted my statement because it can work, but let's be careful. Let's just be careful with it?
Speaker 2:what was it? who is the guy that did the the john travolta movie? oh, he was a second unit director. Was any the the battlefield?
Speaker 1:earth, yeah, all those touching yeah, it was great, it was really good it was not good, it was it happens, all right and then this is my final note for the movie. Well, i never have to watch that movie again that's funny, because my final note is this oh, i spelt movie wrong because i was typing too fast. I said this move is quite bad, but i meant movie. This movie is quite bad, but i embarrassed myself this move is quite bad.
Speaker 2:Um, yeah, this movie is terrible. Yes, it is just terrible, it's it's really really bad and i mean this is a perfect dantoni hate watching movie because it's just like so many unforced, you know, it's, it's, it's the, it's the errors of ego. It's like yeah stupid george lucas standing there, like i have this good idea making star wars for girls. Like can you imagine a girl liking this movie?
Speaker 1:no, because it's pretty much anti-woman, it's anti-feminist, like that's how i see it. But you know what do i know? you know it's also again. It looks terrible that everything is designed ugly so nobody's gonna like it. You, george lucas, you got a ton of money. Fix it, make it look beautiful.
Speaker 2:Gah lee let's talk about something good. Tony, did you watch anything you?
Speaker 1:like this week, i'm gonna be out with the. I did not. I did not enjoy a single thing this week i did not enjoy a sick, did you?
Speaker 2:you must be playing some stupid video game.
Speaker 1:No, it's been. It's been a tough week. I haven't. We haven't watched anything. We finished season two of only murders in the building, which is obviously great um, but you already did that last week, so i said that last week because that's when we started it and now we finished it and i haven't watched anything else. So here's what i will say, as i was at target yesterday. Okay, target, just shopping along, shopping along, looking in the book section as i do every once in a while.
Speaker 1:And guess who has a book? do you remember danie pellegrino? oh yeah, he's got a book now like, he's like, he's like i don't know if it's a novel. I think it's more of like a real what's that called when you write about real stuff? um, but yeah, i guess he's big on some social medias now and now he's got a book, so he's doing great good for him he's very sassy. I think he has a very sassy podcast and now he's got a book as well and it's called reading the book exactly and i took a picture of it.
Speaker 2:Let me find it because i want to give the title for everybody money and danie pellegrino's pocket. You just took a picture of his book.
Speaker 1:I did not buy it, that's true, but it's called uh. How do i unremember this by uh, unfortunately. True stories by danie pellegrino so check that out everybody and let me know if it's good and then i'll buy it. You know what i mean.
Speaker 2:Go danie, go, danie, go, danie go i don't remember him being particularly funny and comedy but i do remember him being sassy, so i feel like it does work, yeah, so it's good.
Speaker 1:That's good. I'm glad he's doing really well.
Speaker 2:It's awesome uh, new black mirror dropped, so we're three episodes you in um you know i didn't know that people complain and whine and say things uh i love black mirror, even you know. No matter what, it's great. Yeah, uh, kate maras in one oh, from zoom, from zoom, fame kate mara i was like looking at her and looking at her, i was like, oh my god, that's kate mara. Uh, needs to gain some weight, put some weight on oh no, she's just getting a little gaunt is that there terribly thin, but there's.
Speaker 2:There's some good ones. I'm three in. There's two more to go. Okay, we'll finish them up right today or tomorrow yeah, i'll have to.
Speaker 1:I didn't even realize that dropped. I gotta go. I'm so behind on on tv. There's so much content dan and secret invasions dropping on marvel plus i saw that and i i haven't watched marvel in a hot minute, i'm not gonna lie, but i i do love sammy.
Speaker 2:So i will be watching that yeah so, tony, did you find us a movie? is there? is there a bat are? have we finished all the bad movies? and we've seen them all?
Speaker 1:and no, we haven't but we're gonna watch a great movie next week because, uh, i'm finally. He's gonna start delivering very slowly on my promise i don't want to do it all at once and, you know, blow my load, as they say. Uh, i don't know why i said that's so dirty, i'm so sorry, don't, please, don't blow your load.
Speaker 1:I'm not gonna do it, i'm gonna. I'm gonna rein it in. Um, we're gonna go back to an old favorite here and we're gonna watch the twilight saga, new moon. Is that the second one that is? oh no, i'm gonna skip to the third one day. Yeah, it's the second one. We gotta take them one at a time, baby.
Speaker 2:It's gonna be good.
Speaker 1:I've just you know, i've been wanting to watch it for a while now, and i think it's time it just feels like time have? have you ever seen them? no, no. So i had only seen the first twilight one time, and then you made me watch it a second time and i had never, i never, progressed further through the series, unfortunately, because boy would it treat me either, so i'm okay, i'm virgin, the only thing i know about twilight is eventually, the one has the baby and the guy what's his name?
Speaker 2:falls in love with the baby a grown adult falls in love with the baby.
Speaker 1:Yeah, i know that part too, and that's what i'm excited to get to.
Speaker 2:That's end game right there, baby. So we're gonna do all we may as well, just do all the twilight. We'll probably just do all the twilight movies in a row now you just want to finish it off in a row?
Speaker 1:okay, great, i'm probably gonna have to rewatch the first one to really get back into the groove of it. I think so that is a movie.
Speaker 2:I really i remember quite a bit. I really i remember what happened in that movie i like that movie and i mean i don't think i'd seen it. I mean i think when we watched it was the second time i'd seen it, you know wow, okay and it's still held up for you. That's unbelievable still good, still enjoyed everything, but all the same things. I enjoyed about it the first time and enjoyed about the second time. I love it good for you like that.
Speaker 1:Listen. I'm i'm glad you like it and i'm excited to see how this goes. I i can't wait.
Speaker 2:I mean that's the funny thing is, you know, just like when we watch zoom, it's like i still like zoom, still, yeah, yeah, no zoom it's what we don't like.
Speaker 1:I'm like this works for me.
Speaker 2:You know, we all have terrible movies that work for us.
Speaker 1:Well, now i have only good movies, yeah uh, huh, yeah, and bring it on um fire it up. It's fire it up and get it right.
Speaker 2:It's right behind me but i mean, the interesting thing is, we've done this movie, this show, for so long and i think the only other movie, the only movie i think we've ever done that i would ever revisit, is mac and me that was the only one i'm at.
Speaker 1:It's great. Yeah, mac and me was very fun, the movie i remember what we've all done but i'm sure there's at least one more that i would rewatch. I don't know. I can't make that promise. I'll check.
Speaker 2:I'll check and find out okay, if you like what you see, give us a thumbs up, leave us a comment, uh, subscribe and um, yeah, if you know, if there's a movie you want us to do, we will always take that into consideration. And we'll be back next week for for a month's worth of twilight movies, because there's five of them. Right, are there five?
Speaker 1:i thought there was four oh, maybe it's four, so i don't. I don't know how many we'll.
Speaker 2:We'll either be doing three more twilight movies or four more twilight movies, depending. I mean there are pretty.
Speaker 1:I'm pretty sure there's one, two, three, four, five.
Speaker 2:Fuck me, there are five because, because i'm sure, like that last one is like one book they split into two.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's just a time to everyone breaking don part one and two yep, so we are in for a whole month of twilight we're in the twilight work, you know, since it is october and we're going into halloween, perfect time to do that's twilight. That's wrong, dan you got your months wrong again and, yeah, we're gonna see christin stewart.
Speaker 2:She's in all of them, so that'll be great.
Speaker 1:I mean, i can't taste stew.
Speaker 2:The funny thing is i love all three of the leads. I love k stew, i love patinson and i love um our boy abduction.
Speaker 1:That's another one i would watch again with uh, with the guy with the werewolf, it wasn't terrible wasn't terrible.
Speaker 2:That's when the bomb was in the oven in the oven good see, good see. Bomb in the oven good see. Yeah, i'm in the sad thing about that movie. If we could talk about that movie for a minute, of course we can it, they should. It should have been better. They should have given them an actual good vehicle. You know, it's like when you see what was the man.
Speaker 1:I didn't give them a chance the map damon borne identity.
Speaker 2:When you saw that first one you're like that's a good movie yep 100, not a movie i ever rewatched, but your. I was like i had.
Speaker 1:I have. I've rewatched it several times.
Speaker 2:It's very good yeah, so he, he got, he got he did not help taylor out at all short, short drift, yeah, 100% it is.
Speaker 1:That movie is not his fault, it's you know. You got to give him a better, a better thing to do. He's not a bad.
Speaker 2:I like him, we like him, he's yeah, it is funny how we've we've gotten our, uh, our, our people that are friends of the show even though they don't know. We've got a lot of friends of the show we'll have.
Speaker 1:We'll have him on guy story.
Speaker 2:He's a real good friend, real close, pretty much everybody that's in the franchise friends of the show, so i don't know about that get out of here, pat, and best looking, greatest actors that ever lived okay, we're getting out of control. We gotta end this podcast now okay, well, uh, we'll hopefully see you next time goodbye everybody.